Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin
One year trip

Greetings From Bangkok
Bangkok, Thailand
Could our trip have got off to a more smug start? Not only do we have 365 days of holiday left, but our first meal in Bangkok was at a five star hotel (due to the immeasurable benefits of Murphs extensive extended family) and our first day spent lounging around a 5 star pool.
Our first tuk-tuk ride
Visited the Grand Palace, Temples and a giant reclining buddha.
Disappointed by only having seen about 5 lady boys but upset by the amount of sex tourists disguised as normal looking men.
We're heading to Chang Mai tonight on a dream of a 12 hour overnight bus. can't wait!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on March 24, 2006 from Bangkok, Thailand
from the travel blog: The Smug Adventures of Murph, Tay, Colly & Erin

Hola Mehicko!
Mexico, Mexico
Zocala
Mexico City is the third largest city in the world, with a population of 25 million people. Driving out of the airport, the lights illuminated the city sprawl as far as the eye could see. The depressing grey slums stretch for miles and miles, however once you get into the city centre, the outward signs of poverty disappear and reveal a surprisingly impressive array of architecture. We were initially staying in the Zocolo by the largest cathedral in Latin America. Next to this was what we believe could well be the largest flag ever created, at least the size of a football pitch. In order to get to grips with the history of Mexico, we visited the Anthropoloigical Museum where aside from learning about the progressing Mexican culture, we saw one hell of a lot of pottery. Even in our fine physical peaks, we couldn´t face covering the distance that is Mexico City Centre by foot. Instead we took an open-top bus which visited all the major tourist attractions such as the affluent area of Polanco, the historical Paseo De La Reforma and Chapultepec Park.
Team England
On our third day in Mexico City, we moved on to Hostel Amigo where it was impossible to pass through the reception/bar area without involuntarily having tequila poured down your throat by the energetic barman. We experienced some true Mexican culture when we took a group trip to the Mexican Wrestling Stadium. It turned out to be similar to WWF- very staged, extremely camp entertainment featuring lots of beefcakes in spangly leotards and gimp masks with bikini clad women parading the stadium and..........a token midget. Of course. A favourite was ´Maximo´the only gay in the ring, whose flouncing around brought his opponent man-hulks to their knees. Our authentic Mexican night continued as we were taken to a salsa club which featured a 12 piece Mexican band. Unlike a night in Jaxx, where we will happily bop on our own, we were continually accosted by Mexican men insisting we allowed them a dance. Humorous attempts at salsa lessons began with ample hip gyrating and twirling, revealing that those Mexican men can really move.
Colly and Aly show up the Mexicans?!?
The English among us got fully involved and dominated the dance floor all night. It was on this dancefloor that something magical happened.......as the Mexicans retreated for a mass breather, only seven were left standing, one thing untiting them all......terribly over-enthusiastic dancing. Team England was born, its members being all four of the smug amigos plus Oxford boys Aly, Nick and Sebastian.
Pyramid of the Sun
Bright and early the next morning, we headed to Teotihuacan which is a 2000 year old lost Mayan City. Here we scaled the Pyramid of the Sun, the 3rd largest in the world and strolled down Calle De Los Muertes (Street of the Dead). In 650 AD it was the 6th largest city in the world, a religious and economic centre until much of the city was destroyed by a fire and for unknown reasons fell into decline. It must have been an impressive sight when the pyramids were painted their original blood red and illuminated by the sunlight.
Oaxaca Market
After a throroughly enjoyable stay in Mexico City, we moved on to Oaxaca. We were lucky to be able to visit this picturesque town as just a few months ago the state was closed to tourists, due to political unrest.
Aly in birthday wrestling mask
There had in fact been a huge protest just a few days prior to our arrival and although we saw the remains of a few barricades, it was hard to imagine this tranquil town as the scene of such events. Some local specialties include Oaxaca cheese, chocolate and tequila, which we were happy to sample mass amounts of as we perused the market. The rest of Team England joined us and thanks to the addition of Danish friends Rasmus and Joel, we now became known as Team Europe.
Carnage?
We celebrated Aly´s birthday in style and he was especially delighted when we presented him with his very own wrestling mask. That evening we discovered that juvenile behaviour such as spraying each other with shaving foam and bouncing on beds is still as enjoyable as ever. Following this fun was a Sol-fuelled night which inevitably lead to yet more attempts at salsa dancing and tom foolery on the dance floor, much to the local´s bemusement.
Drunk star gazing
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on February 14, 2007 from Mexico, Mexico
from the travel blog: The Smug Amigos Do Central America

Bedknobs and Broomsticks
Puerto Escondido, Mexico
Clouds at the witch's house
From Oaxaca we took a detour from the tourist trail and stopped 3000m above sea level in the mountain village of San Jose Del Pacifico. Here Team Europe found themselves inhabiting a cosy witch's attic. The witch was an old lady with flowing grey braids and a weathered face who enjoyed conversing with her garden. Luckily for us she was a white witch who kept her powers only for special occasions such as fixing our broken toilet.
The witch's lounge
Her house was something special to behold, filled with voodoo dolls hanging from the ceilings, the walls covered from top to bottom with psychadelic art work, and the piece-de-resistance, her very own black cat. It was a very chilled out place with incredible scenery. The house was set in the hills above the clouds and from our attic window, one minute mountains were visible as far as the eye could see, and the next we were completely enshrouded in mist.
Very Mexican ponchos
We spent a couple of days relaxing and soaking up the atmosphere whilst having some very unique conversations (mostly started by Aly), involving cheese and the social strata of English dialogue. Having had enough of the cold, we headed down the mountains to the beach.
The minibus taking us to the coast grew increasingly sweaty as we approached Puerto Angel. Peeling off our dampened clothes we ran straight to the sea to cool off. Not much happened on our one night in Puerto Angel, although we did have an amazing fish dinner prepared single-handedly by a small Mexican lady in a tiny kitchen, (the meal was so good we ignored the presence of a rogue skunk loitering near the kitchen.)
Team Europe in Puerto Escondido
Our quiet bedtime reading was livened up by the loud intrusion of Rasmus and Joel, two very drunk Danish boys. They had managed to get completely legless in the quietest spot on the coast and provided some priceless bedtime entertainment before the English boys came to the rescue and sent them home.
Rasmus and Joel
We hopped a few hours up the coast to Puerto Escondido, a slightly more lively beachside town. It was here that we saw our first
Aly with barracuda
evidence of the corrupt Mexican police in action. Whilst walking down the street with an Israeli guy we had just that night befriended, a police van pulled up and demanded he get in as he was drinking a bottle of Corona. There was little we could do as he was whisked away but bumping into him a few hours later, we learnt that he had paid them off with 400 pesos (about 20 quid). Murph and Colly had got away scott-free despite the fact that they themselves were clutching tequila sunrises at the time! The boys went on a fishing excursion whilst we enjoyed some beach time. They returned home triumphantly bearing their catches of barracuda and tuna which they then proceeded to disembowel all over the communal kitchen, much to some guests' disgust. Tasted damn good though! Our last night in Puerto Escondido marked an emotional farewell for Team Europe. It had been a whirlwind romance, but all good things must come to an end so we wiped away those tears as we boarded the overnight bus to San Cristobal.
Pretty church
San Cristobal was to be our final stop in western Mexico and proved to be a charming little town in the hills of the Chiapas District. We spent a day visiting some of the many pretty churches and exploring the quaint cobbled streets. We visited San Juan Chamula, a traditional Mayan settlement. Our visit coincided with a religious festival and so we witnessed fireworks and a procession in the square. Their church is extremely unique, pine needles and candles covering the floor provide the heat necessary for worship and bottles of coca-cola are consumed for their energy. Their religion is based on Catholicism introduced by the Spanish but also includes elements of their traditional shamanist-animist practices. The second part of the tour took us to the house of a family where we watched an old lady prepare us fresh tortillas with goats cheese and squash powder. Tay had a wonderful suprise when Murph got down on one knee and proposed to her whilst sporting traditional Mayan wedding costume.
The proposal
They are planning a June wedding. Love was in the air as we celebrated Valentine's Day with a candlelit dinner for four, where Erin proved to be an old romantic as she presented the rest of the girls with wonderful heart-shaped lollies. Aah!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on February 22, 2007 from Puerto Escondido, Mexico
from the travel blog: The Smug Amigos Do Central America

Towed
Auckland, New Zealand
Apparently New Zealand is cold, very cold, particularly when you disembark a plane inapproriately dressed in flip flops. Rumours of a lack of central heating were quickly confirmed as we checked into a freezing dorm room in the heart of Auckland. Plans to buy new clothes were thwarted when jet lagged and exhausted from an over night journey, a short nap turned into an eight hour sleep-a-thon and day turned into night. To warm our cockles we sampled our first taste of southern hemisphere box wine known as 'goon'. We found a particularly pleasing brand in the form of Country (the cheapest)- no fridge was required in our dorm room. Being in an English speaking country vastly improved our friendship making fortunes in the Globe club that night. So much so in fact that we awoke the next day to a phonecall from Kiwi David reminding us that he was picking us up at 8.00 for Katherine's 21st birthday party. As a result we had to arrange our second date with Tako from Tonga for midnight at Lenin Bar at the Viaduct, after the party had finished. One hitch in making these plans however, was the need for proper shoes to gain entry into Lenin Bar. {{PICT0437.jpg|right}}Unfortunately trek shoes and flip flops would not suffice. Still not quite over our jetlag, we missed shopping hours (9-5.30) and as a result all had to buy matching $5 sparkly shoes. We warned our new friends of this fashion faux pas in advance to avoid needless embarassment. The 21st party turned out to be a fairly intimate family affair, luckily the free bar soon eased our discomfort. Things began to get surreal when the speeches started, to say our presence there was random is an understatement. We had never met Katherine before in our lives yet forever she will have a photo of four English girls, in matching gold pumps, sipping wine (at her Father's expense) in her special 21st birthday photo album. Midnight came, date two began and we spent the rest of the evening at the Viaduct, the trendy harbourside drinking area. {{PICT0440.jpg|left}}
The rest of our time in Auckland was primarily spent shopping for warm clothes and walking up Mount Eden for views of the city. A lovely few hours were spent over coffee with some local relatives of Erin's, the Potts family, who were quizzed, notepads at the ready, for all their New Zealand advice. Last job in Auckland was to pick up our hire car, Stanley, who was to transport us around the country for the next six weeks.{{DSCN0846.jpg|right}}
Clear blue skies and sunshine beat down on us as we made our way north to the Bay of Islands. We stayed in Paihia which despite being the busiest town in the area, was still tranquil and quiet and in an incredibly beautiful setting. Plans to further explore were temporarily halted when Stanley incurred a flat tyre during our second day with him. Luckily for us a heroic man in a ute came to our rescue and a quick change over to the spare took place. {{DSCN0849.jpg|left}}Back on the road we visited Ninety Mile Beach (well the 1st mile anyway). Colly spent a lovely morning revisiting an early memory from her days of living in New Zealand at Waitangi Treaty Ground where in 1840 the English and the Maoris formally agreed to live as one people. {{DSCN0878.jpg|right}}
One thing we quickly noticed about New Zealand was that it is near impossible to turn a corner without being dumbstruck by yet another incredible view, bays and lakes sneak out of nowhere. The advantage of having our own car means we have the freedom to stop when and where we like for the beautiful views and or comfort breaks. {{PICT0449.jpg|right}}
We returned to Auckland via the Waipoua Kauri forest where we saw some very big Kauri trees, 'the daddy ' had an impressive girth of 5 metres diameter and was 51 metres high. Back in Auckland it seemed that Stanley's bad karma returned to sting us one more time. Having been informed that we could park in any space until 8am we slipped into a row of cars. Upon innocently returning to collect her golden shoes Murph found that Stanley was nowhere to be seem. After frantically scouring the nearby streets, a kind passer-by eventually informed her that a white car had just been towed. It appeared that we had inadvertently parked in a bus stop (it could happen to anyone).
{{DSCN0936.jpg|left}}
The car was well and truly in the compound and would remain there all night and so we headed back to the Globe to drown our sorrows. As Erin smugly napped, Murph, Colly and Tay traipsed across the city to track down Stanley. After an hour of fruitless searching, they eventually discovered him next to the prison, what a lovely area. Elaborate plans to flirt our way out of a fine were dashed when we were confronted by a woman brandishing a pre-issued fine. {{DSCN0939.jpg|right}} $130 later we drove Stanley back to the hire place and traded him in for an automatic with a much needed tape-deck. Hopes are high that Sir Cliff Richard will be better behaved as he leads us South to Rotorua.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on August 5, 2006 from Auckland, New Zealand
from the travel blog: The Smug Adventures Down Under

Chiang Mai
Chiang Mai, Thailand
After some sort of a sleepless nightmare of an overnight bus we arrived in Chiang Mai and managed to bag a hostel with a pool- to die for. Goes without saying that the next couple of days were spent lounging by said pool in preparation for the three days trekking we were about to embark upon.
So the trek begins- delighted to find our group were extremely fun, not so delighted when we started walking uphill! Couldn't believe how extremely out-doorsey we were being and how we embraced looking exceedingly rank- sweaty, ugly and boy-like. The first night was an initiation into "travelly wavelly-ness" as we sat around with our group, guides and thai village folk whilst singing along to a guitar.
Our trek group
The night got more random however when opium smoking and moonshine drinking was interspersed with random thai massages from the locals. At which point the night got even more random when the village children came to dance for us, although we suspect our rendition of the time-warp for them was even more special.
Being entertained by village children
The next day after having been promised a tropical waterfall we found ourselves not in a timotei advert but a pokey, murky pond where tay caused a scene when attacked by a leech (more likely a tadpole).
"Waterfall" on trek
The girls at Whitehaven Beach
Got to our camp for the second night, delighted to find it was a jurassic park esque jungle setting..... however things were not so rosy when we discovered in our sleeping hut an unwanted guest in the form of Mr Leeroy Gustafer Pickles, a spider the size of a baby's head. When the chief of the village was alerted of this peril, we felt sure comfort in his experience of evil jungle spiders and how to eliminate them. However in a Steve Irwin like manner he proceeded to simply poke the spider with a long stick thus only angering Leeroy and hiding him from our sight, the enemy was now at an unknown location. However we soon found our response to Leeroy was somewhat dramatic considering that the extras from "Arachnaphobia" had been re-housed in our camp post-filming.
Elephant riding on trek
Next morning elephant rides all round. Colly and Erin got the dud slow one and were no where to be seen for the duration. However Murph and Tay rode Edgar- apparently the world's most competitive elephant. Whenever momentarily distracted by branches, Edgar took it upon himself to regain prime position on the walk by off roading and almost decapitating murph. Finally came the bamboo rafting where we found our punter was a psychotic livewire which made for an interesting trip down the river- ending with us paddling in sewage and rat infested water.
Overboard on bamboo raft
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on March 30, 2006 from Chiang Mai, Thailand
from the travel blog: The Smug Adventures of Murph, Tay, Colly & Erin

Chiang Mai to Chiang Khong
Chiang Khong, Thailand
After a good night's sleep and a nice shower we realised we had sorely misjudged the amount of days we needed in Northern Thailand and to our horror discovered that plan B "sitting by the hostel pool" was thwarted by cloudy weather. So plan C "random daytrips" was called into action.
Day trip #1.
A cheap tour of Chiang Mai on a tuk-tuk. Won over by our driver brandishing a photo of his 3 beautiful children we proceeded to allow him to take us to every factory within the province. We enjoyed the jewellery, the egg shell boxes and the parasol painting. However things took a turn for the worse when we rocked up to an animal skin factory. Realised it was time to cut our losses when we actually began to consider purchasing a burberry purse made from the skin of a stingray. At this point we started demanding temples, and got taken to a temple 100 metres from our starting point- only it was three hours and six factories later. After a walk around the site we discovered a couple of young monks perched under a sign advertising "Monk Chats" so proceeded to sit down and quiz them with intellectual questions such as "is it true you can't touch girls" and the piece de resistance "what happens if you bump into one by accident?".
Thai village
Day trip #2
Visited village tribes outside of city. Accosted by hoards of village children attempting to flog "beautiful" bracelets, goes without saying we all came home with one.
Small village boy
Murph being harrassed by small children
The Long Neck tribe came last- even after meeting them face to face- still not sure why anyone would want a giraffe neck or a long flappy earlobe.
Long neck tribe
Finally moved on to Chiang Rai- getting a little more off the beaten track. For anyone planning to go here would definitely not recommend day trip #3 to Mae Salong. Did we miss something? Promised by guidebook a mystical Chinese village set in the hills- were disappointed to find a crusty old settlement with the only Chinese influence being "poundstretcher" style Chinese Lanterns.
After racing home from disastrous 5 hour round trip to Mae Salong all very excited about finding ourselves and being at one with nature on impending "jungle retreat". Alarm bells started to ring when Colly and Tay found themselves clinging on to the back of a truck for dear life on treacherous mountain climb. After the jouney/near death experience to our destination we realised it wasn't going to be all hot springs and waterfalls as we found ourselves, in fact, a little too close to nature for our liking. After sleepless night spooning with iguanas and Leeroy's cousins we observed the Sunrise over the mountains at 6:00am and decided that this had definitely been out-doorsey enough for us and headed back to the comforts of the city at 9:00am.
Sunset on trek
Jumped on sweaty bus to Chiang Khong where we are waiting until tomorrow to cross the border into Laos.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on April 6, 2006 from Chiang Khong, Thailand
from the travel blog: The Smug Adventures of Murph, Tay, Colly & Erin

Nerd Alert In Guatemala!
Antigua Guatemala, Guatemala
Lake Atitlan
After an incredibly easy border crossing, our first experience of Guatemala was a terror inducing bus ride in which our gun-ho bus driver had a penchant for attempted overtakes on hairpin bends despite almost zero visibility. Whilst fearing for our lives Colly decided to enlighten us with some interesting facts about Guatemala from the Lonely Planet. Here are some of our favourites.
1. 'Guns, drugs and lives are cheap in Guatemala, an unfriendly combination.'
2. 'Due to people being unhappy with the judicial system, lynchings are an almost daily occurence.'
3. 'In 2002 there were 3606 violent deaths.'
4. 'Rapes, murders and muggings have been common occurences at many tourist destinations.'
Coffee workers doing their thing
After a change of pants we were in Panajachel by the shores of Lake Atitlan which fills a collapsed volcano. After an evening there we boarded a boat across the lake to San Pedro, a chilled out backpacker town. Coffee is one of the biggest industries in Guatemala so we felt it necessary to do a coffee tour to learn more about it. Expecting a chauffeur driven tour culminating with a nice cup of coffee, we were somewhat taken aback when we began scaling a mountain on foot. While we were busy whining and panting our way up, we were put to shame by the children, adults and OAPs carrying 47kg sacks of coffee beans down the mountain. Out of San Pedro´s population of 12,000, 10.000 work in the coffee plantations. The coffee beans are red and sweet so taste a million miles form the roasted coffee beans you get in your average Starbucks.
One Sunday we headed to Chichicastenango, where they hold the biggest market in Latin America. Some beautiful jewellery was purchased on all behalfs and we were very upset that we couldn´t take home one of the adorable chicks, kittens and puppies on sale.
Larking around in Antigua
Next stop Antigua, which was a lovely town with cobbled streets, old monastries and overwhelming views of surrounding volcanoes. An unmissable experience in Guatemala is to climb an active volcano. We opted for the sunset tour of Volcano Pacaya and embarked on a rather exciting and unique adventure. Although we knew we would be seeing lava, nothing could prepare us for being just metres from the flow and the falling red hot rocks. To add to the atmosphere, we could smell the rubber on our shoes burning and feel the heat emanating from the rocks.
Real life lava
In fact the rocks were so jagged that one false move could have resulted in a broken limb or an extremity submerged in boiling molten lava. Despite the action clearly going on inside the volcano, as we stood and surveyed the scene from the crater, we were left breathless by the tranquility of the view, the peaks of surrounding volcanoes emerging from the pink blanket of clouds set against the dusky sky.
Colly wiping away tears
It was so beautiful we sat down and composed some poetry whilst wiping away tears of raw emotion. Our return journey was perilous in the pitch black, illuminated only by weak flashlights, the occasional shooting star and the glow from our hearts. An amazing and exhilarating experience, definately one of the best things we´ve done all trip.
Apparently all bus rides in Guatemala were going to be hellish. Trying to save a bit of cash, we opted for a third class bus with cries of 'we got buses across the whole of South East Asia without air con or toilets, it'll be a god damn breeze'. Very soon into the journey we began to regret our decision as the bus driver stopped every ten minutes to see to his errands, drop off packages and enjoy personal cigarette breaks. We gained another insight into police corruption in Central America as the police pulled the bus over and forced all immigrants from neighbouring countries off the bus. Although legally allowed to be in Guatemala and having correct paper work, the workers were charged 40 quetzales each and informed us afterwards that it was already the fourth time it had happened on their journey. After a seven hour journey becoming fourteen, we arrived at Flores delirious from hunger, dehydration and flat-bottom syndrome.
Jagged rocks afront surrounding volcanoes
Flores is an unremarkable town used simply as a gateway for the Mayan ruins at Tikal. Arising at 2.45am, we took a bus to the site. Arriving at 3.45 moley eyed, we set off through the pitch black jungle, alert to every sound. Particularly disturbing was the frightening and bizarre noise of the howler monkeys coming from high above us in the tree tops. We climbed to the top of one of the pyramids to watch the sunrise over the ancient city.
Mayan ruins at Tikal
However as it got lighter, the view was obscured by thick clouds, not quite the magical sunrise we were expecting but a truly mystical experience nonetheless. As we climbed down the pyramid, a family of spider monkeys swung past us going about their daily business with babies of back. The rest of the tour was a nature trail and history lesson as we learnt more about the jungle and Mayan civilisation. Next it was on to Belize and the Caribbean sea.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on March 3, 2007 from Antigua Guatemala, Guatemala
from the travel blog: The Smug Amigos Do Central America

Smack Down!
Belize City, Belize
As we approached the Belizean border we breathed a sigh of relief as we saw that all signs were in English. Our days of frantically pointing at the phrasebook were over. Belize has a very different feeling from Guatemala and Mexico, both the Caribbean and British influences are very clear from the abundance of friendly rastas and the fact that many people are tri-lingual, speaking English, Spanish and Creole.
We stayed in the border town of San Ignacio from where we took a day trip to Mountain Pine Ridge National Park. After employing a local taxi driver for the day, we stopped off at some huge caves which had armed guards outside to stop Guatemalans robbing the tourists. We spent a leisurely few hours basking by the crystal clear rock-pools. Erin however, cockily thought she could tackle the rapids and was almost swept downstream whilst the others watched and looked on in amusement.
Plans to stop in Belize City were quickly discarded after getting in a taxi and heading towards a hostel when half way there unsatisfied by the surroundings, we redirected our driver to the ferryport. This turned out to be a good decision as on arriving on the island of Caye Caulker, we headed to the first guesthouse and heard a cry of "Helen!" from above. Who on earth did we know in Caye Caulker?! As we spun round and our eyes adjusted to the light, we saw a silhouette of Aly K, rock God extraordinaire and co-founding member of Team Europe, hollering our names.
Delighted to find that Rasmus and Joel were also there, the Team was partially reunited, unlucky Nick and Sebastian. Following a day bobbing in the sea by the Split, our team went global as we recruited Americans Evan, Chad and Zach plus Irish boy Keith. This proved to be a perfect blend of people as we embarked upon a 4 day drinking frenzy of which we will save you the gory details and just enlighten you with some of our best bits.........
1) Day time activities included riding around on golf carts (the only mode of transport on the island) frolicking in the sea and consuming large quantities of freshly baked banana bread.
2) Accumulating foot injuries was another popular activity and there were threats of gangrene aplenty.
3) Each night involved single sex wrestling matches, in which the girls thought they had held their own but the video footage reveals otherwise. This was made less embarrassing as the European boys were equally crap, Chad single handedly wrapped Aly and Rasmus in their bed sheet, "like a burrito." (Rasmus 02/07)
4) Accessories for evenings out included a wooden beaded curtain as worn by Aly and multiple pieces of sand-castle-making-equipment.
5) We invented the best drinking game in the world ever, ingeniously entitled "awight geez". Await with baited breath for its arrival in Great Britain on 1500 hours, March 20th 2007.
Overall we rate Belize 11 out of 10 and give it one big smug adventurers thumbs up!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on March 8, 2007 from Belize City, Belize

Laos Baby!
Muang Piang, Laos
After spending two days in Chiang Khong we crossed the Thai/ Laos border for a 2 day slow boat trip up the Mekong to Luang Prabang. Luckily the scenery and sunsets were absolutely amazing because after 14 hours sat on a plank of wood our arses had seen happier days!
Sunset over the Mekong
First night out in Luang Prabang was group 'slow boat' bonding exploring the city when in the distance we saw.....could those be bright lights? Could that be music? Could that be a sex-tourist-free zone? YES! It was Hive Bar, and we were sure to get involved in some vodka redbull as soon as possible. After hearing a number of reports that all bars in Laos closed at 11pm we were delighted to discover an after-hours backstreet drinking den run by the world's campest Chinese man and a shockingly agressive ladyboy (apparently the hormones aren't working) So in convoy we headed to 'Hong's Cafe' where in no time at all the police came and kicked everyone out due to excessive noise from rowdy drinkers and illegal levels of sweating.
Morning time came and it took four university graduates an alarmingly long time to realise that we had been robbed. After some confusion it was established that Erin and Tay's room had been visited by the ninja from Ocean's Eleven who had crept into their room in the early hours of the morning and stolen some money, their phones and Erin's camera. A trip to the Tourist police caused some friction as we had 'rudely' interrupted their game of bowls. After listening to heated discussions between police and the hostel owners that noone would translate for us, we came away with a 'police report' and let them get back to their busy day's work.
Waterfall at Luang Prabang
The following day we managed to find waterfalls of timotei advert-style proportions. A happy day was spent frolicking in crystal clear waters only disturbed by Murph's sudden attack of vertigo. Upon shimmying up a tree trunk she found herself trapped, her only way of escape was to jump into the waters below. After a grand audience had gathered she finally plopped into the water like a pencil.
The next day was complete cheese on toast as we became the Von Trapp family and cycled around the city.
Colly and Tay mimicking the Von Trapps
Murph and Erin mimicking the Von Trapps
If you're wondering why it looks as though we have just had a bucket of water tipped over our heads, that is because we had.....by every child in Luang Prabang. Apparently New Year celebrations in Loas involve children lining the streets and drenching every passer-by with buckets of water. Funny for the first couple of days until we realised the major drawback would be a nappyrash epidemic....so now we break into a sprint whenever we see one of the little buggers.
Being attacked by small children during the New Year Festival
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on April 12, 2006 from Muang Piang, Laos

Journey to the Centre of the Earth ........and other adventures
Vientiane, Laos
For anyone planning to travel from Luang Prabang to Vang Vieng by bus, please heed the following advice:
a)Under no circumstances feel it necessary to go out the night before and get blind drunk.
b)Colly would strongly recommend sleeping in a bed the night before and not the toilet floor.
c)Fight the urge to press snooze and try to wake up at least 10 minutes before you have to leave.
d)If you are of a nervous disposition avoid looking out the windows at all times as your driver is likely to be a maniac.
e) If a man with a huge rifle gets on there is no need to kick up a massive fuss as he's there "for your protection".
f) Under normal circumstances we would not suggest this for a long journey, but in this case, it is advisable to scoff all of your food rations before the bus starts as the relentless wiggley worm jerking makes it frustratingly impossible to eat (ice lollies can be purchased along the route)
Other than that, sit back, relax and enjoy!
First day in Vang Vieng, hired mountain bikes, again maximum chaffage due to continuation of water throwing. Trips to some caves proved to be a "999" special waiting to happen. Four young girls armed only with hot pants and flipflops enter the caves with one Laos boy and a mere three head torches, expecting a pleasant stroll. We soon realised we were infact extreme pot-holing! Particularly for Tay, whose flipflop bit the dust half way into the trip, and she was forced to scale the rock barefooted-hardcore. Despite the perils which included deep ravines and a swamp like lagoon, the caves were incredible and we would strongly recommend a visit (except for the safety conscious).
Cave exploration
Day was rounded off perfectly lounging in a bamboo beach hut bar which showed immense appreciation for 5ive by playing an entire album.
The next day was spent indulging in the infamous tubing which gives Vang Vieng its name among backpackers. For those unfamiliar with tubing, it involves floating down the Nam Song river in an inflatable tractor Tyre innard, breaking up the 3 km journey with bar stops and rope swings.
Tubing drunk
Due to it being dry season the tubing was unfortunately not quite as extreme as expected, and involved us basically walking half the 3km journey along the rocky river bed dragging our rings behind us. However, we made up for this by discovering at one particular bar a new found love for Lao whisky, redbull and coke. The highlights of the day included Colly losing her tube after it rushed down the river without her, jumping off rope swings and then comparing ridiculous sunburns due to cloudy weather complacency. Needless to say, the night continued in a similar vein with a shocking amount of our new favourite drink. We meet some new friends (who couldn't miss us due to the glare of our rouged limbs) who had the dubious pleasure of being our neighbours at the hostel, and the object of harrassment for the rest of the night.
The gang where we first met in Vang Vieng!
Matt, Hope you've learnt your lesson that asking a drunk Colly if she has had a henna tattoo done will go down about as well as a 15km Field of jars. Luckily enough, Vang Vieng is its own hangover cure as it is dotted with bars and restuarants, with bed like seating which show Friends reruns from dawn til dusk.
Currently in Vientiane having chosen the extremely sporty method of travel - a day of kayaking. Never having looked sexier on out life jackets and helmets, we risked life and (still slightly rouged) limbs down rapids. Erin and Collys attempt at the rapid was doomed from the start when they collided with the first rock and immediately capsized - "You've Been Framed" gold dust.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on April 17, 2006 from Vientiane, Laos

Woo hoo, Spring Break! Who wants a body shot?!
Cancun, Mexico
The Smug Amigos in Sombreros
Colly attacks the pinata
From Belize we headed to the beautiful white sandy beaches and aquamarine waters of Tulum. Here we had a few days R & R to recover from the excesses of Caye Caulker before hopping on a bus up the coast to Playa del Carmen, where it was clear that Mexico's east coast was not actually Mexico at all, but more like America. The beautiful rooftop view from our hostel was a majestic vision of supermarket wonderment, in the towering form of a giant Walmart. As the weather was disappointing, the bakery section became our haven where we abused the free taster system and sampled delights such as pineapple upside-down cake, ham and cheese roll and banana slice. We were so dedicated to the cause that we partook in thrice daily visits and employed strategic costume changes to avoid being recognised. Despite the Americana feel to Playa del Carmen, we managed to experience a taste of Mexican culture when Chris from our hostel introduced a game of pinata for his birthday celebrations. Its amazing how fun being blindfolded, spun around and ridiculed by onlookers can be when you're brandishing a large stick and sweeties are the prize.
The room pre carnage
The room post carnage
My thats a lot of heads
Group shot outside 'Coco Bongos'
We were dreading the prospect of spring break in Cancun due to lack of money, no drinking mojo and excesses of over enthusiatic American college kids. Arriving at our hostel didn't provide any comfort when it appeared to be in the middle of a golf course, had no doors or curtains on the showers or toilets, had strange padded rooms full of old sofas and our room was not unlike a boarding school dormitory from the 16th century. However our plans to leave the next morning were shamelessly abandoned upon the arrival of seven ridiculously hot Australian boys who weren't shy about walking around semi-clad. This is where our spring break really began and the planned two days quickly escalated into a week of carnage. Our main pleasure derived form shouting cheesy Americanisms such as:
"Who wants a body shot!"
"I max out about 130"
"Woo hoo spring break!!"
"Let's get some shooters!"
"Who wants a body shot?!"
"Hey dude how much d'you bench? Oh I max out about 130, but it pays the bills."
"Let's go chug a beer!"
Having a lovely time :-)
The group partake in 'Sperm Whaling'
The major drama of the week came on the last night when Petey, Lee and Ryan were a little worse for wear in our favourite club Daddy-O's and were consequently asked to leave. Somehow the situation spiralled out of control and they were soon encircled by policeman, handcuffed and being beaten with batons. They were bundled into the policevan and taken to the station. Having witnessed this shocking police brutality, it was Erin and Murph to the rescue as they began an elaborate adventure across Cancun brandishing their credit cards shouting about how they were going to "bail their boyfriends out of prison!" from the back of a golf cart.
Battered and bruised
A fine example of a hot body!
The next day was extremely sombre however, as it transpired that each of the fugitives would have to pay $1000 US bail to avoid being moved to the main prison in town. Sixteen long hours later the jail birds returned, their wallets considerably lighter and their bodies black and blue, but extremely glad to be free. The moral of the story is anyone visiting Central America should try and stay on the right side of the law.
The fun that can be had on a golf cart
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on March 27, 2007 from Cancun, Mexico

Last stop this town
Los Angeles, United States
We came to LA for one reason and one reason only- to shop. Having ditched pretty much every garment we owned in Cancun we were excited about the prospect of wearing clothes which did not have comedy value written all over them. With the help of our long abused credit cards we explored the Beverley Centre and 3rd Street Promenade in Santa Monica to our heart's content.
"We got your back Spidey!"
On our first night we attended the house-warming of Evan Asano, of Belizean fame who had recently moved down the coast from San Fransico. We reminisced about Caribbean nights over steak and vodka, but illness lingering from our time spent in Cancun made us very unhardcore and we all went to bed early doors. One thing we cannot fail to mention about Los Angeles is the appalling public transport system. Not only does the metro not cover about 95% of the city, the trains are so infrequent you could have run a marathon in the time it takes for one to arrive. Not only that but the entire city is so sprawled that visiting anywhere or anything becomes an expedition of gargantuan proportions.
Girls lunch with Mona
So it was a real treat when Evan became our personal chauffeur and took us on a sightseeing trip to the circus that is Venice Beach. We were disappointed to find Muscle Beach empty most likely due to the cold weather, but it was crawling with weirdos and crazys nonetheless. One place we really enjoyed in LA, however, was The Grove, where Mona Atzinger- Colly's sister's mother-in-law- took us for a scrumptious lunch, where we drank rather a lot of wine and had a thoroughly lovely time- thanks Mona! To add to the day's excitement Tay and Murph were lucky enough to bump into world famous 'Dancing with the stars' presenter Cat Deeley in the ladies' loo of a fancy department store- soooooo LA. The smugs became the stinkys as we finally, after 11 months and 29 of days of talking about it, went for a meal in the famous garlic restaurant- The Stinking Rose.
New best friend Cat Deely
We devoured on average around four or five or possibly even six bulbs of garlic each as we chowed down on the delighful garlic infused cuisine. The next morning we paid for our sins however when we awoke with seriously painful acid reflux and a very smelly room. Other than that we strolled along Hollywood Boulevard, saw the Chinese Theatre where the Oscars are held and perused the Walk of Fame to see the stars.
So on the evening of March 19th 2007 we arrived in LAX to board the flight to our final destination- London Heathrow. We had seriously mixed emotions- excitement about seeing our parents and families, devastation at knowing our year was over and overwhelming satisfaction that we could not have possibly had a better time.
Home sweet home
After ten hours of anticipation we decided to make our parents wait a little bit longer while we applied makeup in the toilets and all joined hands in baggage reclaim for a final teamtalk. After 365 days spent in each others company we could hardly bare the prospect of even a day spent apart, amidst promises of daily text updates for everything spanning dinner plans and unusual bowel movements, we braced ourselves, burst through the doors, and ran to greet our lovely, smiling parents. Top points for John Taylor (Father O'Doode/Mandy Marmite- Mother of nine), recently retired, he had managed to find time to construct a huge banner to welcome us home.
The extremely smug parents
We would like to take this opportunity to thank everybody who has read our blog and followed our journey. To all the very special people we've met along the way who helped to make our trip what it was, and last but not least, to our parents for putting up with a year of worry and always being there to support us.
We have had the year of our lives and can confirm that the Smug Adventures were truly very smug indeed.
Until next time, Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin x x x x
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on April 24, 2007 from Los Angeles, United States

No Man's Land
Hanoi, Vietnam
Blogboy, we sincerely apologise for what you are about to read. After completely disregarding your advice, the following horrific events ocurred.....why oh why didn't we listen to your wise words?!! After a couple of sleepy days in Vientiane we took a 24 hour bus to take us straight to Hanoi. We all expected a hellish journey but little did we know it was going to be worse than we could ever have imagined. The events that transpired here were so traumatic that it has taken us a couple of days to be able to relive this nightmare.
19:00- Depart Vientiane on a dangerously overloaded bus. A city's supply of sugar and our rucksacks filled the aisle.
22:00- Entire bus disembarks for a communal wee on edge of a Laos road.
00:00- Sleeping was impossible enough a feat on the overnight bus, yet any efforts were further squandered by a chorus of snorers that surrounded us.
06:30- Arrive at border.
07:45- Stamped out of Laos with no problems. However, Erin C Gillham notices slight water damage to passport. With blissful disregard we proceed to the Vietnamese Immigration Office.
08:00- Murph, Tay and Colly progress swiftly and smoothly through immigration and are happily stamped into Vietnam.
08:02- One of the guards (referred to from this point on as Satan) hands back Erin's passport and exclaims- "No entry!"
08:03- Erin turns to Murph with bottom lip quivering saying, "they won't let me in as my passport is damaged." Murph retorts, "don't be ridiculous," and returns confidently to the desk, said passport in hand. Satan again says, "No entry," at which point the passport is thrown on the desk with a slightly hysterical shriek of, "this is a British passport!"
08:04- Erin starts crying.
08:05- Tay starts crying.
08:06- Murph starts crying.
08:07- Coldfish Collman manages to hold back her tears.
08:08- Phone call to Daddy Gillham. After a chipmunk-esque explanation from Erin, Daddy G requests to speak to someone who isn't crying. Recomposed Murph takes the call and explains that his daughter has in fact been refused entry into Vietnam. We are essentially stuck in No Man's Land.
08:20- An attempt to smuggle Erin into the country was thwarted by a wall of guards. We are not going anywhere, unfortunately our bus is- without us.
08:30- The Embassy is called and they say they will speak to Satan.
08:40- Embassy call us back to inform us that Satan has repeatedly hung up on them, the situation looks desperate.
At this point we feel the need to point out that the border is in the middle of nowhere. Returning to Laos was not an option as we no longer had visas. In addition, due to there being no British Embassy in Laos, we would have had to return to Thailand to get a new passport and thats only if the Thai immigration guards would let 'the fugitive' in.
08:50- Erin is still crying and is showing no signs of stopping as her passport corrodes further.
08:55- We set up camp opposite the immigration guards. A stare-off ensues- us versus them.
10:00- It appears we are the talk of the Embassy and due to the serious nature of the event we are now in direct cahoots with the Vice Consulate, Elliot Haines- Our hero!
10:00- 14:00- The stare- off continues interspersed with random bouts of crying, fits of hysteria and plans of where the best place to sleep in No Man's Land would be.
14:02- One guard takes pity on us and hands us an unripe and therefore inedible mango. We gratefully accept this gift.
14:05- We come to the conclusion that the damage to the passport could not have been caused by water alone. Our investigative skills lead us to only one possibility- it was the acidic vapours from mosquito repellant that had leaked into Erin's bag. We could not enter Vietnam because of bloody mosquito repellant. Brilliant.
14:06- 15:00- Elliot advises us to charm and bribe the guards. An attempt at a bribe was met with laughter and a refusal of "never!" So operation 'charm the guards' began. A number of guards succumb to our feminine wiles. However, we soon realise it was not us, but our combination padlock that was drawing their attention. This gave us an idea, we began bargaining all of our possessions in exchange for the elsuive stamp in the passport. Murph even accepts a marriage proposal in exchange for the stamp...unfortunately for us he was only joking.
15:00- The Embassy finally has some positive feedback, at long last they have made contact with Satan and some sort of fax is on the way. This came just in time as Murph's last ditch attempt at swaying the guards favour (which involved walking up to the desk pointing frantically at "please help us" in the guidebook with a pleading face) was met with an icy stare from Satan and laughs from the other guards, who incidentally we believe were watching porn.
15:30- To quote Daddy G, "the diplomatic machine was in motion." The fax arrived and an incredibly official looking handwritten note scrawled on exercise book paper was signed by both parties.
16:00- After 8 long hours we hear the sweet sound of a stamp connecting with Erin's passport. Hallelujah! We are in!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on April 23, 2006 from Hanoi, Vietnam

Pardon you!
Napier, New Zealand
One thing you cannot fail to notice about Rotorua, is it's eggy aroma. The stench hits you the minute you arrive. This isn't because it's inhabitants eat too many baked beans, it is due to the fact that it is built on one of the world's most geothermally active areas. A walking tour lead us along a route dotted with pools of bubbling, sulphurous mud from which steam rose creating an eerie atmosphere. Later on we stumbled across St Faith's, a charming Anglican church built on Catholic land. {{DSCN0964.jpg|right}}We were met by the proud caretaker, eager to tell us the history of the church and the story behind the beautiful window which originated in the Isle of Mann. Looking out onto the lake, it gives the illusion of Christ walking on water. We woke especially early one morning to watch the Lady Knox geyser erupt at Waipapa Geothermal Wonderland. {{DSCN0985.jpg|left}}For those of you not in the know, a geyser is like a miniature volcano that spouts boiling water into the air. In this case, the eruption is induced with a soap-like substance at 10:15 sharp every day. The rest of the wonderland boasted many geothermal treats for the eyes and nose, the piece de resistance being a large flourescent green lake. {{.jpg102.jpg|right}}Erin Charlotte Gillham (BSc Honours Psychology) concerned us all when after having read out a list of chemicals that were responsible for the lake's vivid colour, remarked, "it almost looks like there's chemicals in it."
We had an evening of entertainment when we went to the Tamaki Maori Village for a feast and concert. The evening started with a traditional welcome ceremony in which three Maori warriors approached our group's elected 'Chief' to ascertain whether or not we came in peace. After being instructed not to laugh, or even smile as it is considered rude, we had to watch poker-faced whilst the warriors bulged their eyes, waggled their tongues and frog-hopped across our path. {{DSCN1016.jpg|left}}Despite this, there was a general consensus that one particular Maori warrior was very sexy indeed, with delightful thighs- a fine example of a man. Our shameless perving, obvious by the plethora of photos of him dancing in his loin cloth. We watched traditional Maori arts, crafts and daily living before a concert of song and dance. The infamous haka was performed, which is particularly relevant amongst current controversy about the All Black's new haka which ends with a throat-slitting motion. Due to Australian protest we believe this has now been removed. We aren't sure how to make clear to you how good the feast was, cooked in the traditional Maori hangi. We were presented with an all you can eat buffet, which we definately did justice. Perhaps we can convey better with examples.........at the end of the meal, Murph tried to relieve some tension with a burp, which resulted in a mouthful of food. Yes, she had eaten that much. Meanwhile Tay had embarked upon a pavlova and custard eat-off with a boy twice her size. The competition really began to turn heads when they requested a fresh pavlova from the kitchen, long after everyone else had called it a night. Tay felt she had the moral victory considering he was a massive man.
An interesting fact for you blog-readers, is that Lake Taupo was created by the largest volcanic eruption recorded within the last 5000 years, the effects of which could be seen in the sky from as far away as China and Europe. {{PICT0566.jpg|right}}However, more importantly, Taupo was also the name of Colly's late cat, so we felt we owed it to him to make a visit. It was indeed a very big lake. Nearby we were impressed by Hukka Falls which turned out to be more like ferocious rapids cascading through a narrow river gorge. On the way past we made a 'bee-line' for a Honey Farm having been drawn in by promises of free admission and free tasting. The honey was quickly shunned in favour of free samples of fruit wine. After having been ID'ed for our thimbles of wine, we tried several new flavours, the boysenberry variety standing out. Having read that it was one of the most scenic routes to drive in New Zealand we headed sun blazing along the Volcanic Highway which circles the Tongarira National Park. Ten minutes into the journey the rain began and twenty minutes in, we were enshrouded in fog. Instead of the stunning scenes we were supposed to be enjoying we could now barely see three metres ahead of us. Visability was at an all time low. This became more apparent when we reached the Visitor's Centre and were informed that we were infact surrounded by snow-capped monutains which was news to us. {{DSCN1051.jpg|left}}After disappointing weather in Taupo the sun was shining for us in Napier on the east cost. Interesting fact number 2 blog-readers is that in 1931 Napier was destroyed by a massive earthquake. As a consequence it was rebuilt at the height of the Art Deco period and is now famed for this style of architecture. Our hostel the Criterion Hotel was a prime example of this. {{PICT0574.jpg|right}}We took a walking tour in the sunshine and the next day headed for Wellington.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on August 13, 2006 from Napier, New Zealand
from the travel blog: The Smug Adventures Down Under

Once upon a time in Hobbiton.....
Napier, New Zealand
The sign
Once upon a time on a cold and rainy day three young hobbits decided to visit some old friends. So Tayling Tubbleweed, Ezzabel Buttercup and Murphington Meadowflower skipped along a lane, round some corners and over a bridge. One they got to the shire, they found that it was a beautiful day. This was of course because the sun never fails to shine in Hobbiton. Upon arriving they met Eric the Good Story who sat them down and told them tales of how the Shire began. After all the story-telling the young hobbits were famished and so feasted upon plums from the plum tree. Then it was time to call on their old friend Bilbo Baggins. They knocked upon his door and were greeted with a huge smile and open arms, 'You naughty scamps! You should have told me you were coming! Would you like some tea?'.
Bilbo's house
The Shire
'Of course!' they exclaimed in unison, and so everyone sat down to have a delicious cup of hot tea. The young hobbits were delighted to discover that there was to be a party that evening, with singing and dancing and plenty of laughter. And so the whole Shire spent the evening dancing with joy around the Party Tree.
Dancing around the party tree
Hobbit Porn
Much later, the three young hobbits bid farewell to their friends, and dragged themselves home, exhausted from their exciting day.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on August 16, 2006 from Napier, New Zealand
from the travel blog: The Smug Adventures Down Under

Don't be angry Mummies and Daddies.................
Nha Trang, Vietnam
So Hanoi. There are 3.4 million mopeds in Hanoi and we have seen/ been run over by every single one of them. Boy do they love tooting their horns. After tranquil Laos Hanoi seemed ridiculously hectic. We were there during the Communist Party Congress and it was a surreal experience to be surrounded by such blatant Communist propoganda. First port of call was a date with the British Embassy, where we were disappointed to find that our hero Elliot Haines was back in the UK and so we couldn't thank him in person for saving our asses at the border. (Incidentally Erin is now stuck with the most unfortunate passport photo for the next ten years- unlucky.) We indulged in a trip to the traditional water puppet theatre where we discovered 45 minutes of watching puppets dance in water is actually 40 minutes too long. Enjoyed an overnight boat trip to Ha Long Bay which involved cheesy star-gazing, yoga up on deck and collecting shells on a tiny deserted island- paradise. More importantly though we suprisingly managed to entertain ourselves for an hour and a half with an indepth discussion about yoghurt. Whilst on the boat trip we discovered a love for arty camera work so we urge you to enjoy any future use of black and white or sepia image mode used in the journal. In our haste to get to Nha Trang (legendary party town on the coast) we found ourselves getting involved in two overnight buses and a horrific 5am start in just 3 days. A visit to the De-militarised Zone "served as a poignant reminder of Vietnam's recent brutal history" (Murph). The trip was made especially interesting when our journey back became a race against time in order for us to catch our overnight bus. We were bundled into a small van whose driver decided to play 'how many random Vietnamese people can we pick up off the side of the road and squeeze in to the van.'At one point there was us and 15 Vietnamese people snuggled into a 9 seater vehicle and the sweaty experience was made even more extreme for Colly as she had to spend the journey's entirety pressed up against the armpit of a clammy old man. Once back in Hue we had 2 minutes to get back to the hostel and catch the bus- in our panic we bypassed the sensible and speedy motorcycle option and opted for the only mode of transport actually slower than walking- the cyclo, good effort girls.
So got to Nha Trang and for $20 we are basically staying in a penthouse suite with sky tv, room service (which we have definitely over indulged in) and a balcony- to die for. After six weeks of relative sobreity we were looking forward to Jaxx-style nights and a Reunion with Matt and Robbi- the boys from Vang Vieng. For the parent's sake we'll keep the details of the following four nights as brief as possible and have decided to document events using bullet points.
1. Murph got stung by a jelly fish on her face.
2. Erin had a drunken revelation that on her first night here she had dampened her curiosity about the "bum squirter" (the hoses located in toilets). This began a group initiation with individual trips to the toilet to sample said bum squirter. Robbi came off the worst after sorely misjudging the force of the bum squirter leaving his linen trousers somewhat sodden.
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3. We spent one hungover and delirious day piled in our room listening to the entire score of Les Miserable with sing-a-long.
4. After drunken group deep and meaningfuls with the boys about how much we all loved each other the boys came out with a quote that scored a ridiculous amount of brownie points. After having likened us to the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers in Robbi's exact words "individually you are all amazing but together the whole is greater than the sum of your parts".
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5. Murph found her male hair twin in the form of Phil who was sporting a waist length mane. By looking at their silhouettes it was impossible to tell who was who (Kavos ladies you will especially appreciate this after Murph's "I am the man from the Black Eyed Peas" comment.)Colly then proceeded to grab Phil and shout in his face, "I'm actually obsessed with you!" Poor bugger.
6. We intiated comedy dancing on the first night which resulted in the whole dance floor doing either the scissors or the knee to elbow.
7. Murph rang Charlie Parish on her mobile purely to demand to speak to his Mum.
8. Murph has lost two pairs of flip flops, her camera and her purse. However she remarkably still managed to come home with a bag full of toilet roll so it wasn't all bad.
9. In attempting to grab Erin's attention Robbi called out "E C G" at which point Erin turned around with indescribable excitement and squealed "Oh my God, those are my initials".
10. Everything else is censored. {{DSC00181.jpg|right}}
We have four more days in Nha Trang (if our bodies can handle that many more buckets of Vodka Redbull) and then move on to Saigon.
For those having inquired regarding the author of our blog we would like to point out that it is the combined genius of all four of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on May 3, 2006 from Nha Trang, Vietnam

The Return to Normality
Nha Trang, Vietnam
After the boys left we felt it necessary to have a night off to recharge our batteries. The next morning we had a Team Talk discussing Redbull, where after a sleepless night of hallucinations decided to quit cold Turkey. At the beach that day we met two Texan cowboys and enjoyed spectating as they instructed a group of eager young Vietnamese boys in a Navy commando style workout regime.
Cowboys working out on the beach
Considering they looked like a couple of Hollywood stars this was of course a pleasurable experience for us. Arranged a dinner date 7pm sharp, by 8pm we realised we had officially been stood up! However, we recovered ever so quickly when our fish in claypots arrived- a taste sensation. Headed to the Sailing Club later that night to find that they were waiting, tails between their legs, with excuses at the ready. After flashing their Hollywood smiles, they were forgiven and the night continued in a typical Nha Trang style.
In Vietnam it is standard behaviour to ignore the annoying hawkers on the beach, however, in our fragile states we succumbed to the charms of a young Vietnamese boy brandishing a colossal collection of what is, in hindsight, relatively crap beach art. After examining the collection for approximately 2 hours, between us 5 were purchased. Surprisingly enough this lengthy deliberation did not prevent Erin from later realising she had purchased 2 identical pictures just in different colour schemes. Unlucky Mummy and Daddy Gillham, its the thought that counts. Murph and Tay were unable to tear themselves away from the charms of Why Not Bar on the final night, their tally is now 6 pairs of flip flops lost during one week in Nha Trang.
Erin in rain clothes
As much as we'd loved it there, we were relieved to say goodbye to Nha Trang and make a retreat to the mountainous resort of Dalat. Although it pretends to be in Vietnam we awoke after a 6 hour bus journey to find ourselves in the heart of the Swiss Alps. It was kag-in-a-bag/ jac-in-a-pac/ mac-in-a-sac en force as we strolled round a deceptively large lake (this was unfortunate for Erin as due to her turquoise waterproof and trouser set she morphed into a smurf for the day).
Posing at the cable cars
Next day had quite a few hours to kill so headed for a cable car where a thoroughly enjoyable day was had by all, soaking up the alpine atmosphere. The rest of the day was wiled away reading, writing and drinking bucket loads of free tea. True English girls at heart.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on May 8, 2006 from Nha Trang, Vietnam

Car trouble part deux
Wellington, New Zealand
First impressions of Wellington were good as we managed to find a hostel that provided free dinners. We'd heard Courtney Place was the party street and so Friday and Saturday night were spent there. After two nights of bar hopping each different establishment merged in to one. In hindsight, we needn't have left our hostel, photographic evidence shows that after having demolished a box of Country, we were having a lovely time amusing ourselves in our room. The fun you can have with bunk beds.........
We spent a lovely afternoon in Khandallah visiting Colly's old house and some neighbours Beth and Rachel. We thoroughly appreciated Beth's homemade banana cake and shortbread. Gifts of chutney and jam have been put to good use in many a sandwich. Colly, Beth and Rachel managed to inadvertently coordinate both their outfits and their cheeks in a shocking fuschia pink- we apologise for the glare.{{.jpg169.jpg|left}} One of Wellington's main tourist attractions is Te Papa, a mammoth six floor museum full of free exhibitions. Once again Murph, Erin and Tay geeked-it-up at the Lord of the Rings exhibition, whilst Colly pensively got involved in some art appreciation.
You probably won't be surprised to hear that our car problems continued. It turns out Sir Cliff Richard was to be no better behaved than Stanley. His timing was impeccable, when in the car queue for the ferry to the south island, we turned the keys in the ignition to no avail. We had a flat battery. After a couple of minutes of cursing Ace Car Rentals and watching all other cars board the ferry, Murph sent for help. A kind steward, jump leads at the ready quickly appeared. Once finally on the ferry we explained our plights to another steward who informed us in no uncertain terms that, "there would be plenty of young men on board willing to give you girls a jump start!" Luckily we didn't need one and cruised onwards to spend the night in Picton. The next morning we awoke to discover that we are undoubtedly the most unluckiest car renters in New Zealand. We had been issued a ticket for parking the wrong way along a street. Who even knew that was an offence? {{PICT0679.jpg|right}}
In Blenheim we were excited about the prospect of touring the wineries of the famous Marlborough region. Our excitement was slightly dampened by the fact that we had to share a very intimate dorm room with 8 smelly boys, all of whom snored and one of which shouted obscenities in his sleep. All being conossieurs of cheap Tesco wine, we headed for an educational trip to teach us about the finer varities. The tour began quite sedately with us being uncharacteristically quiet due to our lack of knowledge. Twenty-something wines later we were all too happy to voice our 'educated' opinions on undertones of Vegemite and oaky flavours. Tay and Erin found they favoured a light and fruity Sauvignon Blanc while Murph and Colly preferred a full-bodied Chardonnay. They were all in agreement about the bubbly.
Abel Tasmin National Park boasts some of the most unique and stunning scenery in New Zealand so we spent a couple of days wandering the shores and collecting shells. {{DSCN1082.jpg|center}} Pupu Springs were not as murky as they may sound, the clear blue waters were so inviting we had to fight the urge to jump in. {{DSCN1104.jpg|left}} Franz Josef, our next major destination was a long way south so we decided to break up the journey with a number of stops, the first being a seal colony. Despite gale force winds, we could'nt tear ourselves away from watching the baby pups and honing our now near-professional seal noises. {{PICT0621.jpg|right}}It was like a David Attenborough special. Paparoa National Park provided us with pancake rocks and blowholes. We couldn't resist a visit to Greymouth's mock gold mining town. The average clientelle consisted of 5 year olds with their grandparents. {{PICT0615.jpg|left}}This did not deter us from frolicking about the park with huge grins on our faces and pic 'n mix from the sweetie shop. We panned for gold and came away triumphant with our tiny flecks of treasure- we know how those early pioneers felt. {{PICT0616.jpg|right}}
Bad luck comes in threes and we made the schoolboy error of making one too many toilet stops. We found ourselves up shit creek without a paddle as Sir Cliff broke down once more. The flat battery had reared its ugly head once again. We found a local mechanic who instead of coming to help us, sent us away with a jump set and vague instructions on how to use it. {{S5020018.jpg|left}} Once we had got the engine running with all limbs intact, we returned the jump set and were sent off with the mechanic's particularly helpful advice, "to avoid further trouble, just don't turn off the engine."
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on August 18, 2006 from Wellington, New Zealand

Sky and Ice
Franz Josef Glacier, New Zealand
Sunset over Lake Wanaka
The first thing we did when we arrived at Franz Josef was to sample the delights of the only bar in town, The Landing. We woke up the next mornning unwilling to leave the confines of our hostel due to the previous night's behaviour (dancing on chairs in the middle of a near empty bar- the less said the better). We plucked up the courage to leave our hostel but only for the sole purpose of escaping to the barren landscape of the Franz Josef Glacier.
In a crevass
Trousers tucked into socks, crampons on our boots, we climbed four hundred ice steps, freshly carved by our pick-axe wielding guide. Three hours later we had squeezed through numerous crevasses, across steep ledges and narrowly avoided icy worm holes. It was during this time that Murph found a new talent as she inadvertantly discovered a freshly opened crevass. She likes to think that she saved many lives with this discovery.
Lake Matheson
On a beautiful day we walked around Lake Matheson, a mirror lake which brilliantly reflected the mountaineous backdrop. As trekking up Glaciers was old news to us now we were content with simply stomping to a viewpoint to observe the Fox Glacier from afar.
Next stop on our epic voyage was Lake Wanaka, a town full of trendy-wendy skiers and snowboarders. Due to ski season all the accomodation was full and so we trailer trashed it up and became residents of the local caravan park. At the Fox Glacier we had attempted to do a skydive, but good luck was not on our side. A half hour car journey had been spent psyching ourselves up to such adrenalin-pumping classics as The Prodigy's 'Smack my B***h up'. On arrival we discovered that not only cars had it in for us, our transport problems applied to planes as well. This time it wasn't just a flat battery, a whole new engine was needed. Take two and we decided to jump over Lake Wanaka instead, where luckily all planes were in working order.
Colly coming in to land
The day turned into an impromptu photo shoot as the company were updating thier website. You can browse the pages of www.skydivenz.com to find our photos along with alarmingly cheesy post-dive 'testimonials'.This is a direct link to a delightful photo of the four us. http://www.skydivenz.com/skydive_blog.html
Skydiving
Murph would like it to be known that due to warnings of severe cold at 15,000 feet she felt it necessary to wear two jumpers and a coat under her jumpsuit and this is why she looks like Fat Bastard's wife and not because she has put on 100 pounds. On the plane ride up there was much broken equipment banter as we all sat wedged on our instructor's laps. It is hard to sum up the experience, the dive was truly amazing. Falling out of a plane at 200km/hr and free-falling for 60 seconds is not half as frightening as one might expect. With views of snow-capped mountains, Glaciers and lakes we were very smug with our choice of location. We loved it so much we are already planning another jump.
Jump-suit porn
To celebrate we headed to Shooters Bar where we had the surprising revelation that the 'cool-guy' boarders had a penchant for karaoke. One particularly emotional rendition of Eric Clapton's 'Tears in Heaven' almost brought tears to our eyes. Shooters closed disappointingly early so we accepted an invitation to a friend's house party. Roger, 'Flank' and the crew must have woken the next morning to find a storm had passed through their rented apartment. Their weekly food shopping had been devoured, including a rather large supply of mustard and Erin confused by the concept of a sliding door pushed a little too hard and removed the bathroom door from its hinges. Boys: Erin 'The Incredible Hulk' Gillham apologises and hopes you got your deposit back!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on August 26, 2006 from Franz Josef Glacier, New Zealand

Car trouble part trois
Te Anau, New Zealand
Snow in New Zealand
After a night in Te Anau we woke to a landscape carpeted in snow. In order to travel to Milford Sound we were legally required to carry snow chains in our car. The drive was spectacular, taking us through a winter wonderland of Narnia-esque proportions where we felt it appropriate to crank up the Christmas tunes and merrily sing along despite it being August.
No stopping sign (so we stopped and took a photo)
The slightly risky drive led us through no stopping avalanche zones. We wanted to capture the moment by briefly stopping for a photo of the no stopping avalanche sign only to be reprimanded by two men in a passing vehicle who of course were the only car to pass us the entire journey and of course were highway patrol. Apparently if they had been police we would have been fined $150. Law breaking turned out to be a recurring theme of the journey as during a harmless muesli break we took sympathy on a hobbling giant bird who appeared to be helpless and hungry.
Evil Kea
After feeding the bird a hearty amount of dry muesli a car pulled up and the occupants informed us that the bird was in fact a kea. It is a criminal offence to feed these birds as they are extremely dangerous and have been known to eat the kidneys out of live sheep. We protested that this particular specimen was different, he was helpless and needy. Upon this, the evil trickster swiftly escaped (the broken wing apparently faked) to the tree tops above us. We'd been had. Milford Sound is one of fourteen fiords along the South-West coast. We took a boat cruise through the fiord past waterfalls and were lucky enough to catch a glimpse of seals and very rare penguins. Yet again we were dumbfounded by the uniquely beautiful scenery of New Zealand "is there no end to this country's captivating wonder?" (Erin Charlotte Gillham on Milford Sound 20/08/06)
Milford Sound
Next it was on to Queenstown, a renowned party place full of backpackers, skiers and boarders. Being as none of us know how to ski we indulged our passion for cable cars and rode the Queenstown gondola to the mountain top. Most thrillseekers flock to Queenstown for the world's first bungee, whitewater rafting and various other extreme sports. We however donned bicycle helmets and "luged". Not once, not twice but five times. Luging is a simple concept, it involves sitting in what is essentially a plastic tray with dodgy brakes and rolling down a hill.
Tay and Murph over Queenstown
Cue girly screams of unadulterated joy. We took a daytrip to nearby Arrowtown, a quaint former goldmining settlement which was nice.
Fun at the luging track
It was on an attempted trip to Glenorchy that Sir Cliff and his bad kharma struck again. After calling out the AA and having the battery changed in Franz Josef we had become complacent and believed our car troubles to be over. How wrong we were. Whilst cruising along leisurely a Range Rover sped by, its occupants hanging out of the windows frantically trying to attract our attention to something wrong with the car. We pulled over and a quick examination established it was a case of deja-vu - another flat Tyre. Our previous experience led us to believe that we could attempt to change to the spare ourselves.
Hero boys replacing tyre
After triumphantly jacking the car we attempted to unscrew the fake bolts on the hubcap and could have been there all day had a van with two skydive instructors not pulled over to assist us. They got the job done quickly and kindly followed us back to town in case of any more mishaps. We took the car to a Tyre shop where we were informed the offending article that had punctured the Tyre was a small shard of roadkill bone. What are the chances?
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on September 2, 2006 from Te Anau, New Zealand

Die Hard Travellers
Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam
We knew we'd arrived in Saigon at the wrong time when the bus pulled up outside a bar still seething with sex tourists. Arriving in a new foreign city at 4:30am is not advisable- all normal hotels were closed so we found ourselves inhabiting a disgusting sweat box of a room. Being such hard core travellers we lasted one night in this squallor before transferring to a luxurious hotel around the corner. At a mere snippet of $4 a head, it included such amenities as air conditioning, satellite tv, fresh towels daily and a fridge to cool our beverages in. First day in Saigon was spent on official business collecting Erin Charlotte Gillham's new passport from the Embassy complete with particularly special photo. This was followed by a visit to the extremely up-market offices of Price Waterhouse Coopers where replacement phones for Tay and Erin had been Fedexed. We temporarily brightened up reception in our inappropriately scruffy beach wear- thanks JT. The official business continued as we toured the city desperately in search of a new black bra. For those who have never been to Asia, you will not appreciate how South-East Asian women are not particularly well endowed in the chest area. Many frantic cupped-hand gestures and requests for "one very big black bra!" were met with shocked bewilderment and little success.
A more cultural day followed and included some of the more conventional sights of Saigon. Visiting the Cu Chi Tunnels was an eye-opener on two accounts:
1) Anti- American feeling is still being encouraged. This was confirmed by viewing a propoganda film that referred to Americans as 'the brutal devil'.
2) We Westerners are absolutely massive. The Viet Cong fought in tunnels that were 60cm high- these have been doubled in height for the tourists and believe us it is still a tight squeeze.
There was almost another 999 moment when two members of our group failed to emerge from the original tunnels and the Guide firmly believed they were headed to Cambodia. Murph and Colly enjoyed impersonating Bond girls when they shot AK47's- pity their aim left a lot to be desired.
A Nha Trang Reunion was had when we met up with a couple of Swedish girls and took them to our favourite restaurant. The reason we loved this restaurant is simply because they added copious amounts of cheese to every dish-a chef after our own hearts. Following dinner we returned to our luxurious suite to sample some Vietnamese vodka we had chilled in our fridge. Now we fancy ourselves as connoisseurs of cheap nasty vodka (Tesco Value anyone?) from hairspray to paint stripper we've had them all. However nothing could prepare us for the aftertaste of this shocker. It had a bizarre biscuity/ nutty/ foody/ indescribable flavour which offended even our hardened palates. This was continued the next morning when Erin rose to take a morning swig of refreshing water only to discover she had gulped a mouthful of vodka- she then proceeded to spend the next 30 minutes wretching into the toilet.
So far on the trip we have discovered a particularly astute talent at selecting the worst weather days for outdoor activities. So yet again, ignoring the clouds we traipsed to the waterpark where we found a slide that is rivalled by no other. Mounting a dingy in pairs we were plunged into complete darkness. Taken by surprise there were girly screams all round- only amplified by the unexpected finale of a free-fall drop into a plunge pool. Of course following its discovery we then proceeded to repeat the experience approximately 59 times. After excited Baywatch style runs into the wave pool, we discovered it was more of a gentle swell but it made for a great stage to watch the impressive thunderstorm that ensued in the afternoon.
To satisfy our love for the Mekong River and family orientated organised day trips, we took a two day tour to the Delta. This included observing quintessential Vietnamese floating markets and of course stopping along the way to learn the fine art of making obscure Asian delicacies. The Coconut candy was a surprising treat pity the snake wine (used as Viagra) didn't go down quite so well (no pun intended). {{DSCN0035.jpg|left}}No matter how spectacular the views of the banks of the Mekong, they were nothing compared to the events that transpired on our journey home. After three hours on a sweaty bus we were feeling fairly fatigued and subdued- this would not last long. Our guide who had been fairly uncharismatic and cranky throughout our trip suddenly came to life in what can only be described as an impromptu concert. He stood at the head of the bus microphone in hand and announced he would sing for us a traditional Chinese folk song. Our ears immediately pricked up- this was unusual but we had seen nothing yet. After a pretty ropey rendition of the Chinese folk song (to which the bus sat- a group of silent and confused spectators). The guide then began to belt out a variety of songs (mostly unrecognisable). Our personal favourite was undoubtedly the audience participation number 'We Will Rock You' to which he became most animated and urged the bus to clap and sing along with him. He showed Gary Barlow-esque song-writing ability when he spelt the word c-o-c-o-n-u-t to the classic tune of 'Freres Jacques'- a moving performance. {{DSCN0203.jpg|right}}
After a tearful farewell to our hotel and Vietnam we boarded a bus to the Kingdom of Cambodia.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on May 19, 2006 from Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam

No Man's Land, Part Deux (nearly)
Phnom Penh, Cambodia
12.00pm- We arrive at the border with Erin clutching both new and old passport in hand hoping for a smooth transition.
12:03pm- Erin breaks into a cold sweat upon sighting the all to familiar uniform of the Immigration officers.
12.04pm- Erin bravely approaches the desk and presents 'the passport'.
12:05pm- The guard looks stern and exits the booth.
12:06pm- Oh shit.
12:07pm- While Erin stands stranded at the desk Murph, Tay and Colly make a secret pact to sever all ties with "the fugitive," and continue regardless.
12:08pm- The short lived plan is thwarted when they realise that having entirely matching travelling attire makes them all too clearly recognisable as a group.
12:09pm- After Erin is dragged off to an outhouse Murph, Tay and Colly merrily make a beeline for Duty Free and spend the last of their Vietnamese currency on some Mars miniatures.
12:10pm- Murph, Tay and Colly position themselves on the sidelines and observe the drama unfolding whilst enjoying their chocolatey light bite.
12:11pm- Erin is being detained, stranded amongst a pack of immigration guards- her fate in their hands yet again.
12:12pm- The girl realise their friendship with Erin is simply a burden, she has trouble written all over her. They now begin to Hope that she will actually be stuck at the border. Plans to recruit a replacement group member commence.
12:43pm- Luckily for Erin after 30 minutes of deliberations the guards decide to let her off with purchase of a new visa to be stuck in her new shiny passport. The old one is now permanently banished to the bottom of her rucksack, never to be seen again.
12:44pm- Finally the girls leave Vietnam and enter Cambodia.
12:45pm- On seeing Erin pass successfully through to Cambodia, coldfish Collman breaks down and releases the well overdue pent up tears and cries, "oh God, she's still here!"
(Erin cried no tears during the course of this day)
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on May 22, 2006 from Phnom Penh, Cambodia

Murph's 22nd birthday
Te Anau, New Zealand
Murph with birthday dinner of New Zealand Salmon
Friday 25th August brought Helen Patricia Murphy's 22nd birthday. After receiving her extremely grownup gifts of a cuddly toy lamb and massive bar of chocolate, we did what we believe most 22 year olds do to celebrate their birthday and went for a round of indoor minigolf. It was the most elaborate course imaginable where the '19th hole' was a free lolly. The birthday girl won and there was not a hint of cheating involved. Murph's birthday present was a meal for four at a restaurant of her choice courtesy of her parents.
Night out in Wellington
Thank you Mummy and Daddy Murphy. The lovely meal was followed by a sickly birthday cake, store bought but home decorated with pick 'n' mix. A fantastic night on the razzle followed but we were awoken the next morning by the hostel receptionist who informed us that we could only stay the next night if we promised not to go out due to excessive noise making. Her first proper day of being 22 and Murph had been well and truly grounded.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on September 2, 2006 from Te Anau, New Zealand

Pucker up, anyone for sushi?
Christchurch, New Zealand
A perfect day in Dunedin combined two of our favourite things, alcohol and chocolate as we visited the Speight's Ale House and Cadbury's factory. The entertaining tour of the brewery was educational and not just a piss-up. We learnt that the yeast left over from the brewing process is used to produce marmite. For fellow marmite fans, a handy way to get free marmite, is to become a Sri-Lankan schoolchild, as they receive the delicious spread daily due to its health benefits. In New Zealand, 'skulling' is a term used for downing one's drink. We discovered that the vikings used their victim's skulls as drinking vessels and hence the term was born. The tour came to a pleasant finale when we were given a lesson on the finer arts of tasting beer and free reign of the bar. Here we could sample six varities of Speight's beer including the speciality chocolate ale, whetting our appetite for the chocolate factory to follow.
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We had been looking forward to touring the Cadbury's factory from the day we landed on NZ soil and discovered the huge array of Cadbury's bars only available down under. These treats include a 'desserts' range which boasts delights such as banoffee pie, lemon cheesecake and fudge brownie flavoured dairy milk, as well as the 'Moro' (Cadbury's mars bar) and the 'Perkynana' (banana flavoured chocolate coated chew). We had taken the liberty of compiling a short list of interview-style questions for our tour guide. Some sample questions follow:
Q. Why do they not have the Moro bar in Britain?
A. It's really just a question of British loyalty to the Mars bar, which came out first. In NZ the Moro arrived first and hence it was the favoured version and became NZ's most popular chocolate bar. In fact, there is one consumed every two seconds.
Q. Why does Cadbury's taste different in hot climates?
A. They reduce the amount of cocoa butter to stop it melting.
Another interesting fact is that New Zealanders are a nation after our own hearts. Despite the population being a mere 4 million, Cadbury's produce 40 million easter eggs per year and none of these are for export. You do the math. The piece de resistance of the tour was watching a ton of chocolate cascade from a vat in front of our eyes. Unfortunately we weren't allowed to stick our faces in it :(
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After our day of gorging we felt we should get out in the open air and we went for an invigorating hack at Bums 'n Saddles stables. The ride was frequently interrupted due to our horses being compulsive eaters as they stopped to devour every bush we passed. Colly drew the short straw with her loose cannon of a horse, Smoothie. The girls were happily trotting along when they heard a distant shriek and through the bushes, caught a glimpse of the back of Colly's head bobbing along as she disappeared off in the wrong direction. {{PICT0723.jpg|right}} Her stubborn mule had decided he was bored of the trek and wanted to go home. It took ten minutes to tame the live wire back onto the track, only for him then to attack Murph's horse Warner- there is apparently an on-going bullying problem. Warner finds it tough being the new horse on the block. Overall we really enjoyed the ride, particularly along the beautiful white sandy beach.
Our final destination in New Zealand was Christchurch, the most English of it's cities. We enjoyed ambling along the River Avon and around roads such as Manchester, Gloucester and Oxford Street. During one of our strolls Colly developed a craving for sushi so we popped into one of Christchurch's many sushi bars. Whilst trying to order two California rolls each, a communication break-down somehow led us to leave the shop with sixty four pieces. Colly's craving was more than satisfied.....for the rest of the trip.
Two reunions took place in Christchurch, first we had the pleasure of a drink and night out with Rhiannon Ayeh-Kumi a school friend of Colly and Murph's. Secondly was the reappearance of James Watkin of Asian fame. We certainly went out with a bang on our last night in New Zealand, it was an interesting night with an unexpected twist.....
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on September 6, 2006 from Christchurch, New Zealand

Daylight Robbery, a Familiar Face and the Heart of Darkness
Phnom Penh, Cambodia
On arriving in Phnom Penh a fifth member was added to our crew when we rendezvoused with Ryan James Russell. We don't know what Ryan was expecting but it was probably in the form of some romantic alone time with his girlfriend Laura Kay Collman. However, the poor bugger got a nasty surprise when upon arrival he now discovered he had 4 full-time girlfriends. Things got off to a sketchy start when we were robbed within one hour of our first day in the city. Collman's bag was snatched by 2 youths on a moped as they sped past our overloaded tuk tuk- there was nothing we could do.
Another day, another country, another foreign police station. We now consider ourselves experts in the art of statement giving. A few hours, a few white lies and a few fake witnesses later and $30 was handed over to the corrupt policemen and we left with another police report to add to our ever increasing collection.
That evening we decided to have a wake for Collman's lost bag and found ourselves in Phnom Penh's answer to Jaxx- "The Heart of Darkness" where we let out our pent up dance fever and Tay reacquainted herself with the beloved podium- having to relinquish only part of the stage to a couple of Cambodian ladyboys. Now that we had a smelly boy in our midst we tore oursleves away from the Heart of Darkness to watch the Champion's League final. Upon bursting into the bar shrill and drunk we were confronted by a silent room of 30 sets of angry boy eyes. The television volume was swiftly increased as we clambered over them to simply shout "whisky, we want whisky" in the bartender's bemused face. Drinks in hand, we watched with baited breath after having made a group pact with Ryan to all get naked if Arsenal won (readers from Hartley Wintney willl already be aware of Mr Russell's love for public nudity, please note "Mr April" in the village calendar). Us girls and probably the rest of the bar were all too relieved when they lost- thank God.
Skulls at the Killing Fields
In keeping with our European tradition (Auschwitsch) we can apparently only visit sites of mass genocide when hungover. Rather upsettingly the main feature of the Killing Fields was a tower displaying thousands of the victim's skulls. In line with the usually inaccurate English translations in Asia, this exhibition did not fail to disappoint. "They were trying hard to get rid of Khmer character and transform the soil and waters of Kampuchea into a sea of blood and tears which was deprive of cultural infrastructure, civilisation and national character became a desert of great destruction that overturned the Kampuchea society and drove it back on the stone age." Upon wandering around the site, you could see remnants of the victims clothes still peeping out from the soil. On a lighter note it was inappropriate comments all round when upon sighting a display of victim's teeth Collman announced, "those teeth are whiter than mine! I'm definitely getting mine bleached!" S21 the High School turned prison of torture, displayed many horrific images of victims and sick instruments used to inflict pain. Seeing photos and quotes from members of the Khmer Rouge who are still alive today living free in a society alongside their victim's relatives was a chilling reminder of just how recent these atrocities were. It is hard to believe that a quarter of the population were exterminated just outside of our own lifetimes.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on May 28, 2006 from Phnom Penh, Cambodia

Schnooky Schnooky Schnookyville
Bangkok, Thailand
Whilst in Phnom Penh we decided to treat ourselves to a couple of days at a Paradise beach resort that someone had described to us as, "party, party, party." Known as Sihanoukville to everyone else, due to our obsession with funny sounding words this quickly became 'Schnooky, Schnooky Schnookyville.' Our excitement was soon dampened by a black sky and a relentless rainstorm. We decided to cure our disappointment with a night out on the town and headed to Utopia, a notorious backpacker club.
Party outfits in Shinoukville
However we pulled up, complete with party outfits in the form of multi-coloured ponchos and found the entire strip shut down and deserted due to the storm. Unable to face defeat we instructed our motorcycle drivers to take us to "a bar, any bar." However, not even we could look on the brightside when upon entering 'Freedom' we were confronted by a mass of sex tourists and prostitutes. Somewhat despondent a bottle of whisky was quickly purchased and magically transformed the potential failed night into an unexpected success. Accompanied by two new friends we had previously dismissed as sex tourists (much to their offence) we found ourselves upstairs taking over the prostitutes' lair and spent the rest of the night perfecting the age-old art of pole dancing.
Murph and Ryan enjoying a pole
Erin getting involved with a pole
The crew in the prostitutes lair
The rain continued to pour and thus we gave up on the sun and headed back to Phnom Penh with new friends a plenty.
Our rave reviews of 'The Heart of Darkness' quickly enticed the rest of the crew to sample the delights for themselves and much fun was had by all.
Dr Dan, Murph and Patrick in the Heart of Darkness
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on May 30, 2006 from Bangkok, Thailand

G'day Mate
Cairns, Australia
We have now arrived in Cairns, the first leg of our six month Oz tour. After being jobless hippies for half a year resulting in bank balances containing a grand total of $0.00, it was time to get our hands on some much needed cashish. Within a couple of days we were fully fledged natives with Australian bank accounts, phones and jobs.
Erin at the white party
Secretly hoping it might take a while to find work so in the interim we could top up our tans and sample some aussie nightlife, it turned out the temping agency foiled these plans by finding us waitressing work almost immediately. Having arrived during the middle of the Cairns festival we were all working within days. We've had to trade the shorts and t-shirts for man shirts and bow-ties as we step into the shoes of five star waitresses.
Tay at the white party
Tay and Erin's first job was a little unexpected working at the races head to toe in white body paint serving such celebrities as Australia's Big Brother '06 winner. Their smug jobs continued as they landed a stint on Double Island serving at the privately owned resort.
Tay and Erin on Double Island
Meanwhile Murph and Colly were doing their own private tours of the luxury hotels and resorts around Cairns. Proving that this is clearly where we belong we have managed two drink spillages on guests and numerous glass breakages. Five star service all the way!
All work and no play makes the smug adventurers a little less smug. The infamous Woolshed is the backpackers' favourite club in Cairns, however, it doesn't even come close to our beloved Jaxx so we are currently experimenting with new places. The focal point of Cairns is its man-made lagoon, its free-use barbeques being a particularly enjoyable feature. We've embraced Aussie culture and thrown a fair few shrimps on the barbie.
Shrimp encircled by aubergine
As with everything we do each barbeque has become more elaborate than the last. No longer will a mere sausage suffice. Please see photo of shrimp surrounded by abundance of aubergine.
A big worry about coming to Australia was fear of spider infestations. Having been prepared to look under the toilet seat on every trip to the dunny, we have not yet seen a single spider (touch wood).
Warning crocs about!
However we have come across kangaroos, giant bats and crocodiles. We can't write this entry without mentioning one very sad event. On the day of our arrival, just an hour away from where we were, the "Crocodile Hunter" Steve Irwin died. In the words of the wise Tom Murphy, "First the Queen of New Zealand and now the King of Australia."
Night out in Gilligans
As we are currently working we may become slightly slack bloggers for the next few weeks until we hit the road again. Apologies blog fans, hopefully won't be too long!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on September 18, 2006 from Cairns, Australia

The Great Barrier Reef
Cairns, Australia
Our first day trip out of Cairns was to one of the seven wonders of the natural world- the Great Barrier Reef.
Boat action on the Great Barrier Reef
We jumped aboard Supercat for a snorkelling, diving and eating extravaganza. We bumped into two friends on the boat, Arfon the cuddly Welshman and Jake the tree surgeon (who once accidentally massacred an entire family of possoms with his chainsaw). We spent the day lounging on the deck, the tanning process occasionally interrupted by marine based activities.
Some fun snorkelling
Amongst the beautiful corals we came across cuttlefish, nemo and many other creatures of the deep. It became interactive as we prodded a giant clam and fondled a sea cucumber. Unfortunately for Tay whose one desire was to see a turtle when diving, she guzzled up all her air and had to surface earlier than the rest, missing her chance to meet and feed Georgina the turtle.
Georgina the Turtle (Tay hates her)
She would like to point out to readers that she doesn't actually care about this, she's not bitter and she's heard turtles are boring and stupid anyway. So there. Heah. We spent much of the day trying not to kick the coral as we snorkelled inches above it.
Jake, Arfan and Yordy
Back to reality and we returned to working in various venues around Cairns. Not all as mundane as it seems as Murph had the privilege of serving the Australian prime minister his dinner and listening to a riveting speech on agriculture. In addition we also worked at the beautiful, exotic Thala Beach Resort where Natalie Imbruglia was married. On a less showbiz note, with each new venue comes a new hideous outfit, see photo for one example of a Pat Butcher-esque blouse stylee number.
Looking amazingly hot in our Thala Beach uniforms
Oh how we yearn for the days of Tylney Hall's tasteful green and gold waistcoats. Other than work, pretty much every rare day off is spent barbequing and drinking goon around Jeff/ Yordy the Dutchboy's Combi.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on October 1, 2006 from Cairns, Australia

Angkor What?
Bangkok, Thailand
Next day headed to Siem Reap, however half the group were left behind leaving Tay and Murph to sweet talk a bus driver due to Erin leaving town with their pre-purchased tickets (the journey was hindered by the fact that they now only had one flip flop each). Siem Reap's cosmopolitan feeling and ample supply of up-market restaurants and bars left us impressed. We dined in the very same restaurant frequented by Angelina Jolie whilst filming Tomb Raider in the area. Angkor Wat, the world's largest religious site and reminiscent of the set of United States Jones and the Temple of Doom, provided a fun day out for all.
Bayern Site at Angkor Wat
Patrick and Millsy in Angkor Wat
We found the Bayern Site an ideal setting for hide and seek whilst the main temple was the perfect backdrop for a game of frisbee.
Frisbee in Angkor Wat
Inspired by our Vietnamese tour guide, two Cambodian recorders were purchased from village children and we held our own impromptu concert in the temple grounds. However, our repertoire left a lot to be desired as '3 blind mice' was the only recognisable tune.
Impromtu Concert with recorders
That evening a night out to celebrate Aussie Millsy's birthday was planned but unfortunately for the birthday boy, he came down with a bout of food poisoning leaving us to celebrate in his honour. Aussie Patrick decided to drink for two and after a few too many G&Ts he managed to be sick over the balcony and with shocking precision vomited directly onto the head of the hostel owner's wife. This was our cue to exit and after 11 of us mounted a single tuk tuk we arrived at Zone One. Apparently we had stepped into a year 9 disco as the club was filled by slow-dancing Cambodian couples. We knew it was time to leave when once again Patrick gave us reason to make a quick exit, as he mounted a table full of drinks which abruptly collapsed causing much mayhem and yet more death stares. Next we headed to the ingeniously named 'Angkor What?' bar where we settled right in and comedy dancing commenced.
Following a hangover day we headed to Bangkok on what can only be described as the world's poorest excuse for a road. Seven horrifically bumpy hours later we arrived at the border where for once a smooth transition ocurred. We then boarded the world's most beautiful bus with air conditioning and empty seats aplenty where we passed our time in a Tony Hart fashion sketching one another.
In Bangkok we felt the need to revamp our wardrobes that did not go entirely according to plan. After a ten minute panic buying spree, we returned home laden with day-glo cotton items-half of which were made for children. After spending a small fortune we departed for the island of Koh Tao.
Day-glo clothing galore
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on May 31, 2006 from Bangkok, Thailand

The Start of the Islands and a Deep Sea Adventure
Sunset on Koh Tao
We were pretty pleased with what we saw when we arrived in Koh Tao, a Paradise island complete with beautiful sunsets and beach side bungalows. After inital problems involving giant lizards inhabiting bathrooms, holes in thatched roofs and no power between 6am and 6pm which means waking up in a fanless sweatbox, we settled in nicely. A few days and evenings were spent aquainting ourselves with our fresh surroundings, when we were once again rejoined by old friends Matt and Robbi complete with new recruit Samuel Micheal Manners. We eventually got round to signing up for our open water diving course and persuaded Sam to join us diving for some "getting to know you" bonding sessions. At the point of enrolling we were unaware that this involved 9am starts at school, homework, tests and some hardcore sea action. Things got off to a shaky start when in our first session Collman revealed that she was both afraid of fish and an unconfident swimmer to boot. The instructors were further concerned when at every opportunity we digressed from learning the A, B Cs of diving to discussing overuse of cotton buds in the ear canal and a famous garlic restaurant in San Fransisco- expect to hear more on this in future!
Looking hot in scuba gear
The first real trauma was squeezing ourselves into damp wetsuits and the dawning realisation that scuba diving is literally the most unattractive sport that we could ever partake in. If the fins, goggle masks, mouthpiece (regulators) and cylinder on back weren't bad enough our instructor kindly informed us that in a few hours not only would we all be wearing these outfits but we would also be almost entirely covered in snot- yes please! Dive one involved us descending to the great depths of one and a half metres, not exactly the deep sea adventure we were expecting, instead we spent the next few hours practising such skills as removing our masks underwater, sharing breathing appartus with a buddy and learning how to relieve cramp. Once we had these manoueveres nailed we were ready for our first ocean floor experience and itching to do something more adventurous. After a couple of days diving to 12 metres we felt comfortable in the water and smug that so far we were A* students. The bombshell came however when it was revealed to us that on the final dive to 18 metres we would be accompanied by not one but two cameramen there to capture every inelegant leg flail and every stray bogey. An underwater dance off occurred with Murph rocking the knee to elbow, Collman doing the hop and skip and Sam whipping out a montage containing every dance move under the sun- the "bongos" being a particular favourite. This was only beaten by Tay pulling out the old school Macarena after panicking that an underwater "bend and snap" simply wouldn't work.
Upon meeting our instructors in a bar expecting a private viewing of the video, to our horror we discovered it was to be shown on three large screens for all to see and mock. Between us we purchased zero copies of this video- enough said.
The Sam Manners dance
Cheesy toilet shot
Overall we thoroughly enjoyed diving, not only is Colly no longer afraid of fish but her cold heart was melted at the sight of Mummy Nemo caring for her 2 babies. Tay still swears to this day that she saw a single tear through Collman's steamy mask. Our appetite well and truly wetted we are planning more dives later in the trip.
After a night out to celebrate our new status as qualified divers we left Koh Toa in a hazy blur. Unfortunately all too vivid in this scene was the now engrained image of Ryan James Russell, ever the exhibitionist, arriving in Koh Phangan wearing nothing but a flimsy skirt.
Ryan James Russell donning female clothing
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on June 7, 2006 from Bangkok, Thailand

Puppies, Jumping Through Fire and Full Moon on Koh Phangan
Ko Phangan, Thailand
Koh Phangan is known for the infamous full moon party, however after spending a week there it turns out that every night is celebrated like it is full moon. We'll spare you the finer details but here is a montage of our favourite parts:
Upon our arrival we immediately discovered that we were living next to a 24 hour bakery which quickly became our Mecca. The staff there were in awe at our tremendous and ceaseless ability to consume mountains of baked goods at any time of the day or night.
Murph and adorable puppy
Much excitement was caused on our first night out when we discovered a litter of new born puppies residing in one of the beach-side bars. Tay and Murph took it upon themselves to relentlessly harass the puppies and show them off like proud mothers to everyone else in the bar. Many new friends were made.
A major source of entertainment on Koh Phangan is playing with fire. Images of singed eyebrows and burnt hair deterred us however as usual Ryan James Russell felt the need to get involved. Superman eat your heart out.
Ryan James Russell jumping through fire
A usual day on Koh Phangan involved arising at 2pm, heading straight for the bakery, and then spending the entire afternoon bobbing in the sea. However on one particular occasion Murph, Erin, Matt and Sam, for reasons unbeknown to anyone decided it would be a good idea to swim to a 'nearby' beach. After a fairly pleasant but unexpectedly long swim there, the adventurers discovered that the only way to reach the beach was to clamber across razor sharp rocks cutting their feet left right and centre. Upon finally reaching sand they discovered that it was gritty, uncomfortable and impossible to lay down upon. Sam decided to investigate the beach only to be immediately chased back to the rocks by a pack of wild dogs. A quick exit was made and they now found themselves swimming against the tide amidst giant jellyfish. Eventually after a fearsom afternoon, 4 very red sunburnt faces returned home tails between legs.
The arrival of the World Cup played a major part in the Koh Phangan experience. We are fully aware of how controversial this is, but on viewing the first match with our legendary German friend Erik, we went to the dark-side and could be heard from a considerable distance shouting 'Deutschland, Deutschland, Deutschland!'. Things didn't look good for the first England game when a massive storm hit the island half an hour before kickoff and a powercut ensued. Hundreds of frantic English people spent the first half of the match sprinting around Koh Phangan looking for a bar with a generator that was showing the football and not the Thai King's anniversary celebrations. Luckily by the second half the power had returned and we were back on our usual spot on the beach watching the big screen.
The German Legend Erik Bonhorst
Being partial to taking a theme and running away with it, we discovered UV paint early on during our stay. The majority of our nights out were spent doused in the stuff which we have now discovered has ruined many of our already day-glo items. Our favourites included the UV moustache, the Power Rangers sign and our initials brandished across our bodies. We knew we'd gone overboard when on our final departure Murph and Matt boarded the ferry for Krabi still caked in UV paint from the night before.
Erik, James, Murph, Millsy and Matt getting involved with UV
The full moon party turned out to be exactly the same as every other night on Koh Phangan, just with more people. Everyone retired during the early hours however Murph and Erin, the hardcore ravers stayed out well beyond Sunrise to well and truly see in the new day. Tay rose from bed at 7.30am with a second wind and a fresh bucket in hand to join in the daytime beach rave. The girls only admitted defeat when the music finally stopped.
The girls and Sam all slightly inebriated
All in all a good week but definately ready to leave so we headed to chilled-out Krabi for some R&R.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on June 17, 2006 from Ko Phangan, Thailand

Tribulations and Celebrations
Cairns, Australia
Croccy Woccy
So a few weeks had passed and we felt it was time for our second trip out of Cairns. We booked a few days off work and headed up the coast to Cape Tribulation, the only place in the world where two world heritage sites exist side by side, as the rainforest meets the reef. On the trip up we encountered crocs on the Daintree River...did you know that a croc can survive on as little as one chicken per month and that the biggest croc on record was a lengthy 8m? We saw two baby crocs, but unfortunately it was a little too hot for the big Daddies as they wallowed on the riverbed to escape the heat. Incidentally, they achieve this feat by cutting off the blood circulation to their tails and other limbs and slowing their heart rate to one beat per minute in order to stay under the water for long periods of time. The crocodile is surely a fine example of evolution at its best. Astounding.
Erin having a lovely time at Cape Tribulation
We headed on to the Daintree National Park where we wandered among the rainforest and mangrove swamps. Our ecological education continued as we learnt about the resourceful nature of the mangrove trees. When their salt content gets too high (due to proximity to the sea) they filter all the excess salt into one unfortunately leaf which becomes sacraficed for the greater good of the plant. Marvellous.
One massive spider
After a strenuous day of learning we checked into PK's Jungle Village for some R&R. This was only mildly disturbed by the presence of a spider which made Leeroy Gustafer Pickles (of Asian fame) look like a friendly money spider. Alarming.
We spent an afternoon exploring Cape Tribulation and its lookout points, where its possible to stand with one foot in the reef and the other in the rainforest. En route home we began to wade through a creek. Some shouting from a local fisherman alerted us to the presence of a 4.5m croc in the vicinity. After a quick team talk we decided we didn't fancy becoming its next 'chicken' and found an alternative route home. Phew, close shave.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on October 16, 2006 from Cairns, Australia

Granny's Birthday
Happy Hour at Pier Bar
After a token stop in the 'playground of the rich and famous' Port Douglas, we returned home to Cairns to begin the celebrations for Erin Charlotte Gillham's 23rd birthday (Granny, if you will). This began with a meal courtesy of Mama and Papa Gillham, calzones and ice cream all round. Thank you it was truly delightful! Whilst a quiet night had been planned, we hadn't anticipated the vast quantities of free alcohol that was to come our way. Things were kicked off with a complimentary bottle of vino with dinner, then it was onto the plush casino bar, 'Vertigo' where we were lucky enough to have acquired a voucher for a free bottle of wine. Next stop was our favourite Thursday night haunt, ladies night at Rhinobar for free champagne. Bottoms up. Our last stop of the evening was, as per usual, Gilligan's, where after rescuing a man in thongs (flip-flops) and smuggling him past the bouncers he rewarded us with not one, but two bottles of wine. This is where memories of the night end. The next morning we retraced our steps by following trails of mini baby-bel wax, pretzels and foam teeth to the local Nightowl Convenience store (this is where we believe our night came to an end). Fatties.
Some free wine lovin' at Gilligans
After a couple of days back at work, Sunday the 8th October brought Granny's official birthday. Celebrations commenced with the obligatory birthday breakfast of sweets and chocolate. Yummy. Next it was present giving time, she thought the gifts couldn't get any better after unwrapping a souvenir 'Hard Croc Cafe, Cairns' t-shirt, but then out of nowhere she was whisked off to a surprise location...'Fun to bead' (average age of clientelle, 6) where we made necklaces and confirmed our suspicions that it is, in fact, fun to bead. Joyous.
From top to bottom: Tay's, Murph's, Erin's, Colly's
Celebrations continued with our beloved cockney boys Michael and Mark, with a barbie in the 'avo' at the lagoon.
Mark and Michael
Many animals were devoured. Bellies full, we waddled to the Pier Bar for our last ever Sunday afternoon happy hour. Sob. We watched the sunset sipping G&Ts where we were joined by Yordy, Jake, Matt and Kerry. The night took us through Koalas, PJ's and Gilligans and plenty of possom chasing took place.
Erin looking beautiful with birthday presents
Erin would like to say that she had a lovely time and thanks her wonderful, talented travelling companions for the magical day. Hurrah for us. Hangovers gone, Tuesday came and it was goodbye to our fantastic hostel Koalas, and to Cairns where we've really enjoyed our time.
Under the Koalas sign for the last time
We will look back on the memories with fondness. Au revoir, auf wiedersehn, adios amigos, see ya later alligator and in a while crocodile.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on October 16, 2006 from Cairns, Australia

Goodbye Thailand
Krabi, Thailand
View from our hotel in Krabi
A long and arduous journey to Krabi involved a wide array of different modes of transport and an unwelcome rainstorm. This caused us to arrive, along with everything we owned, soaked to the bone. After a night in the main town we headed to the backpacker's haven of Railay Beach. The journey was initially delayed as we were stranded in our hotel reception watching the relentless downpour. Once we finally braved the weather our departure was further hindered by a stand-off with the longboat drivers and their blatant attempts to rip us off. After surrendering we endured an Ellen McArthur-style Atlantic crossing which left our faces stung by the spray and nausea all round. We disembarked to a beautiful lagoon enshrouded by stunning cliffs. The still visible effects of the tsunami were a constant reminder of how different this Paradise place can be. The hunt for accommodation came up trumps when we found a pretty much deserted resort of chalets amidst lush greenery with spectacular views. The only drawback were the 65,000 near-vertical steps that had to be clambered up, rucksacks and all.
A smug day was spent lounging by the beautiful pool followed by an equally enjoyable day cruising round nearby islands- the highlight was the island that resembled a giant chicken, for obvious reasons.
Chicken Island
Snorkelling was enjoyed and luckily the large number of jellyfish were avoided. One of our favourite aspects of Krabi and in fact all of the islands, has been the seafood. Krabi particularly impressed us with it's evening barbeques where sumptuous shark and barracuda steaks were thoroughly enjoyed.
FHM Shoot
We left Railay Beach for Phi Phi which involved a slippery stomp through the shallows, with rucksacks on to board our boat. This was worth it when we were rewarded with free tea and biscuits once aboard. Murph and Robbi decided to become advanced divers on Phi Phi and so embarked on a course with crazy German instructor Hollie.
Robbi and Murph diving
Things got off to a hairy start when within the first five minutes, Robbi plummeted to the depths of 20m, disappearing within seconds into the darkness causing Hollie to go and fetch him and leaving Murph bobbing alone in the middle of the sea. Necessary elements of the course included a dive to 30m and navigating under water. The pair elected to do a wreck dive, peak performance buoyancy and underwater photography. All proved interesting due to high winds and rough seas, making clambering round the boat in scuba gear somewhat perilous. However, the wreck dive caused the most drama when the disappearance of a marker buoy, caused an entire passenger ferry to go missing under the sea. Luckily a fancy boat with a radar turned up to save the day and Murph proved she had learnt little in the navigation course when she managed to crash into the wreck twice.
Nemo
While the divers were getting their early nights, Matt, Tay, Colly and Erin were getting acquainted with the local nightspot- Apaches. Dotted around the club were numerous speakers which we found unable to avoid hogging all night.
The crew with death bucket
We knew we'd made a show of ourselves when accosted during the day by apparent strangers with heckles of, "Oi speaker girl! We saw you dancing last night!"
We were soon joined by others from the Koh Phangan crew- James, Erik and Ffion, accompanied by the 'Death Bucket'.
Lost in the moment
The infamous death bucket
After spending the last 3 months continuously talking about getting a Thai massage, we finally indulged. After being oiled up, clambered over by small Thai women and having every bone in our bodies cracked, we felt suitably relaxed. As well as leaving Thailand, we also said goodbye to our bum-chums Matt and Robbi.
Boys, we'll miss you!
The boys in a lovers embrace
See you in 9 months for an authentic Italian Rausa buffet courtesy of Vito.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on June 27, 2006 from Krabi, Thailand

A Change of Scenery
Tanah Rata, Malaysia
Paradise on the Perhentians
A new day, a new country, a new Paradise island and we arrived at the Perhentians on the north-east coast of Malaysia. However, Paradise was somewhat tainted for Tay and Murph who both endured a 24 hour bout of Malaria (in hindsight perhaps just a stomach bug) which involved Exorcist-style projectile vomiting en masse- delightful! We were back to the wild when Tay and Colly were awoken in their beach shack during the dead of the night to hear the disconcerting sounds of brawling monitor lizards. Once the sun had risen they finally braved the outside. Tay was unsure if she was feverishly hallucinating or if there was in fact, a 6-foot monitor lizard/ dragon/ Godzilla residing outside their front door. Colly's high-pitched stream of profanities confirmed the sighting. While this drama was taking place, Murph and Erin went in search of the great outdoors on a snorkelling expedition, close encounters with black-tip sharks and giant turtles left them speechless with delight and in awe at the wonder of nature, or more precisely the massive size of the turtle's head- beasts of the sea. If you're sensing a pattern, the theme of the island was oversized animals.
After a few days recovery time on the Perhentians we craved a change of scenery from beautiful beaches. However, in order to satisfy our need we had to give up something very dear to our hearts- the Bavarian Love Machine, our beloved German friend. Erik: German dancing changed our lives.
Pure Sex
Us aboard a tree canopy
Next up was the jungle, Taman Negara National Park. We reacquainted ourselves with the sexy trek shoes and headed off to explore. We braved the elements not feeling the need for a guide or even a map. This cocky attitude almost got us into strife when after ascending to the highest peak to see the beautiful view, our descent caused alarm when we found ourselves on barely-there trails with little sign of recent human activity. Panic started to spread throughout our pack when we became concerned that we had ventured onto a 4-day guide-only trek path without a map...a torch....food.....or any idea where we were. Eventually after much inelegant scrambling and abseiling with tree roots we found a small inconspicuous tattered rope which lead the way to safety. The jungle boasted the longest and highest canopy walkway of its kind in the world. Expecting a sturdy bridge we were surprised to find a string of our Dad's garden ladders secured with boy-scout knots, suspended 50m above the jungle floor. We loved every second.
Tree Canopies
Erin adseiling
From the jungle we headed into the cloudy hills of the Cameron Highlands. Staying in an aluminium bunker things were a little chilly and it was back to snuggling under blankets. This time round we ventured into the forest and sensibly elected for the safety of a guide. After learning the medicinal qualities of every plant in the Mossy Forest, we headed to the 'BOH' tea Plantation and factory to learn the process of making tea.
Proper BOH
They realised they were true English girls at heart when by the end of the tour, Tay and Murph had each enjoyed a cup of tea, a scone and a punnet of strawberries. You can take the girl out of England.......The day was topped off with a game of Scrabble.
Us in front of the tea plantations
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on July 1, 2006 from Tanah Rata, Malaysia

Trevor
Kuah, Malaysia
From the Highlands, we headed to Penang on the west coast. There was such an overwhelming abundance of things to do in Penang that in the three days we spent there we went to the cinema three times. Uninspired by our surroundings we decided that despite a month on the Thai islands, we had not quite had our fill of beaches so headed north to the island of Langkawi. We wiled away the first few days with inordinant amounts of eating, sleeping and reading. We developed an unhealthy obsession with the phenomenon that was to become known as "mini-treats". At regular intervals throughout the day, we would bee-line to our favourite mini-mart armed with small change and spend an obscene amount of time grappling at the large plastic jars to select a harmonious blend of bite-sized treats.
Cable Cars on Langkawi
After being kids in a candy store for several days, we decided to become grown-ups and explore the island with a hire car.
Driving Trevor
For the grand total of six British pounds, we had the pleasure of cruising Langkawi in a Proton Saga whilst grooving to the smooth tunes of 'Red FM's' 90's classics - Ace of Base being the unanimous favourite. The car oozed chav and was appropriately christened 'Trevor'.
Trevor Porn
We headed to the cable cars to get a bird's eye view of the island. Murph, Tay and Erin were understandably distracted on their way in by the duty free supermaket on this tax-free haven. By perfectly combining both frugality and incredible greed, they could not resist an amazing offer on quite an unnecessarily large amount of Dairy Milk chocolate. A glutinous feast was had. In fact, so insatiable was the girls' appetite for said chocolate, that even once it had been melted into an unrecognisable pulp within Trevor's fiery interior, they still continued to devour it with feverish delight.
Some fun with chocolate
Next up Trevor took us to a waterfall but en route we could no longer ignore the excessive leakage from underneath the dashboard and Erin's entirely uneducated cry of, "it has to be the radiator". We swiftly pulled into a petrol station, popped the hood, and the four of us proceeded to stare at the interior for a duration of five minutes, in complete silence. Even Erin Charlotte Gillham,'the mechanic', couldn't determine where or what the radiator actually was. In no time two heroes came to our rescue and quickly determined that the route of the problem was the air cooling system and nothing to worry about.
Trevor has some problems
Reassured we headed back out onto the open road. We enjoyed a paddle in the waterfall, oohing and aahing over a monkey visible in the far distance when suddenly, in the blink of an eye, we were surrounded by an entire pack of them moving towards us at an alarming rate. Luckily for us they turned out to be quite tame and our cries of, "why the hell didn't we get rabies jabs?" soon descended into embarassing baby voices, "wook at the widdle baby waby monkey wunkeys". The day came to a beautiful end with a romantic moment for our farewell with Trevor as we all watched the sun set over Coco Beach.
A monkey
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on July 12, 2006 from Kuah, Malaysia

Hollywood Stars and Hot-tubs
Townsville, Australia
Sunset over the Whitsundays
Our high hopes for Mission Beach were dashed due to a relentless downpour leaving our visit there a little washed out. Luckily our stay was mid-week and so the days became a countdown until Home and Away and Neighbours.
Not enjoying ourselves at Mission Beach
We took a token stroll along the beach but this was thwarted by the heavens opening and so we had to make a run for cover. And smug Australians complain about English weather, HELLLLLOOOOO!
The Topless Moke on Magnetic Island
Townsville was a fairly non-descript place, however, it has a badass kiddie's playground where we had competitions of who could go higher on the swings. This was just a one night stop off for Magnetic Island. Its beauty explains why so many travellers are 'drawn' to it and it certainly 'pulled' us in. Before realising that there was only one road on the island, Murph, Erin and Colly hired a Topless Moke (very small Barbie-esque vehicle). We spent the day cruising round visiting various bays and beaches. At the end of the day we chased the sun and watched it set from a vantage point on some rocks. Meanwhile Tay got in touch with her inner naturist with a trip to the nudey beach. Whilst the experience was 'liberating' the presence of a very naked, very old man hovering a little too close for comfort led her to cut the visit short.
After a chilled out week we arrived in Airlie Beach, the gateway to the Whitsundays, ready to P-A-R-T-Y!!! After a few nights on the go we decided to have a quiet singular drink in our hostel bar. This was before we were accosted by 14 football players from Perth on their end of season trip. They followed our lead and joined us in guzzling large volumes of snakebite in honour of English uni students everywhere.
The real Matthew
Normally very few things could distract us from the company of 14 strapping young men, however, a Hollywood star being one of these, the football boys were ditched when Matthew McConaughey strolled into the bar. Before any of you ladies stop reading due to extreme jealousy, we regret to inform you that he did in fact look like an alcoholic tramp. Sporting a Tom Hanks in Castaway beard, yellow trainers and for apparently no reason whatsoever, a Miner's headtorch, he proved that money doesn't buy you style, it does however get you rock hard abs and buns of steel ;-) Watching him dance to a live band in the Irish Bar was particularly special, his favourite moves being the chicken and the squat. Sarcasm was lost on him when Colly told him he was an amazing dancer and he innocently thanked her. Whilst the real Matthew had a no photo rule, luckily for us we had our own lookalike on hand to pose instead.
The girls and "Matthew"
Bradley from Koh Phangan looked more like Matthew McConaughey than Matthew McConaughey and one onlooker even asked us if he was his brother!
Us at the Whitsundays
We arrived at the pier for our two night Whitsundays cruise and couldn't believe our eyes when we scanned the sea of females. Had we inadvertently booked ourselves onto a lesbian cruise? No, apparently we were just bloody unlucky. Indeed the knowledge that Bradley and 20 men were on the Clipper's sister boat rubbed salt into the wound. We decided to give the lesbians a chance but we soon realised that they were a pretty dull bunch.
The fun elite crew
However, we quickly bonded with Londoners Sash and Naiby and the Aussie deckhands Eddie and Bryce. We formed an exclusive fun clique for the duration of the cruise. Drinking games featured heavily on both nights. When you are stuck in the middle of the ocean without a dance floor or podium in sight the only place to go is the boat's hot-tub, where we bundled in and played with a rubber ducky for hours on end.
Hot-tub action
We were rudely awoken at 8am by the crew banging on saucepans outside our cabins. Our hangovers quickly disappeared when we reached Whitehaven Beach. Our photos can't do it justice but it was by far the best beach we have seen all trip.
Whitehaven Beach
The afternoon brought snorkelling and due to it being stinger season we had to wear full body wetsuits. Unfortunately due to us being lazy we were the last ones off the boat and so were left with extra-large wetsuits where saggy crotch-lines caused much amusement. For reasons unbeknown to us we became fairly hysterical in the water and bizarrely broke into a snorkel-voiced rendition of 'God Save the Queen'. It was beautiful, as was the coral, which was much more impressive than we had seen in Cairns. Once on dry land we had an after-party for the boat, we shimmied our way around town, particularly enjoying Eddie's pole-dancing. The night as usual ended up with a food stop. Unfortunately for us Airlie Beach pie-shop is on our route home. The new pie obsession came to a head when Erin and Tay entered the pie-shop at 2am and requested a spinach and feta be put on hold for when they planned to leave the club at 3:10am. Who ate all the pies? We did.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on October 22, 2006 from Townsville, Australia

Dingo Alert
Noosa Heads, Australia
The "A-team" at Lake McKenzie
After waiting three hours in a pitch black bus stop at Airlie Beach, we were really pleased that we'd saved ourselves $30 by travelling with Premier buses instead of Greyhound. We eventually got to Rainbow Beach where there is really not a lot going on except vast quantities of sand.
The sun shines out of Tay's arse
Following this theme we visited a sandblow (a massive amount of sand blown up from the beach into the forest) where we watched the sun set and got arty with some photography. Enjoy.
Next day we began 'operation fun boys' to ensure we avoided a repeat of the lesbian cruise on our Fraser Island trip. We recruited Aussie Penny Crocker to our mission and scoured the hostel from top to bottom. Things went well when Murph and Tay bravely approached two lovely English boys, Andy and Paul, and asked them to be in our gang. They readily agreed. By the luck of the draw we were also teamed up with two buff young men from Canada, Kurt and Adrian. There were also two German girls. Our first group bonding experience as the 'A-Team' was a trip to the bottle shop to buy a large supply of alcohol for the weekend. Next morning we were up bright and early for pancakes and packing our 4x4, Frank the Tank. Luckily for us, the boys in our group all had get up and go and so we sat down and did what we would do best for the next three days... spectated/perved (also a major theme of the trip).
An inferior group's truck stuck in the sand
After a quick lesson on how to drive the truck we hit the road jack and set off with a shrill chorus of 'awhoooooooooooooooo' with everyone enjoying our quite frankly incredible Britpop playlist (Adrian we saw you taking notes). We drove off the ferry and embarked on our first experience of off-roading as we were thrashed around in the back of the truck on the track to Lake McKenzie, which is incredibly beautiful with pure white sands and crystal clear waters, perfect for a game of frisbee.
The smug adventurers pensing it up
Murph and the boys set off on a swimming adventure across the lake and she put them all to shame by swimming back again while they walked. We got to our camping ground as the sun set and we slipped nicely into our gender stereotypes as the boys put up the tents and the girls (Erin)cooked dinner. Colly would like it to be known that she chopped two whole tomatoes. After being told that fires were illegal, we lit one and our camp quickly became the hotspot. Drinking games commenced as night fell and very soon there were drunken slurs of 'I have never seen such heart-stopping stars in all my life', as we cheesed it up with group star gazing admiring the Southern Cross and shooting stars. We were rudely awoken at silly o'clock by over eager campers ready to embrace the day. We were not. We cruised along the beach up to Indian Head and climbed the rocks for ocean views where we spied stingrays and turtles in the waters below. While Colly and Penny enjoyed a shady nap under the truck, the rest of us embarked on a billion mile hike to the Champagne Pools where we played in the water as the waves crashed around us.
"Awhooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo"
Andy had raved to us about how good Eli Creek was to swim in, however when we got there it was only knee deep and seething with eels (one small one was spotted at any rate). On our way to the next camp ground we stopped for a nosey round the Maheno ship wreck. As we set up camp once more, a park ranger soon arrived to warn us that we were residing in a dingo den and therefore not to leave a single scrap of rubbish out overnight. It was not long until the dingos started appearing which resulted in continual screeching of 'Dingo Alert! Dingo Alert! Dingo Alert!' It was after our first sighting that we introduced the 'no solo toilet trip' rule which led to mass group wee-wee breaks. Our efforts to keep the camp clean and tidy went to pot after we had consumed our alcohol supply. This led to Andy waking up in the middle of the night to find a dingo with its head in a Doritos packet inches from our tents. Unfortunately the only way to view Lake Wabby was to hike across a sand dune not unlike the Sahara Desert. Exposed to the elements this quickly became known as the 'Walk of Death', it was touch and go for a while as to whether we were going to make it. We went for a little paddle in the lake whilst observing Paul and Kurt rolling themselves down the dune and plopping into the water. After doing the girls proud and impressing the boys with our driving skills, it was Colly's turn to take the wheel. Initially this led to mass panic in the back as we were thrust over sand dunes like ragdolls and our lives flashed before our eyes.
Group shot at Lake Wabby
After we managed to get her to slow down, we all thought she was doing pretty well when apparently, out of nowhere, one of the German girls screamed, 'Please can we change the driver, otherwise I'm getting out of this vehicle!' Good effort Colly.
Sadly the trip had to come to an end but just for the record we literally had the best three days ever and would like to thank our amazing group for making it so special. Clicks for the A-Team.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on November 4, 2006 from Noosa Heads, Australia

Koalas, Whatever ball and Tay's 23rd birthday
Brisbane, Australia
Sunset over Brisbane
As we moved on to Noosa, we were joined by a new smug adventurer in the form of Penelope Jean Crocker. That's right, a girl. We arrived on a busy day in Noosa due to the yearly triathalon. All this activity spurred us on and so we went for a ramble through the national park. Sightings of wild koalas and goannas caused excitement as we scrambled through the undergrowth. A nature sighting of another kind was a pair of naked pensioners strolling hand-in-hand along the nudist beach.
Tay, Murph and Steve Irwin
In memory of Steve Irwin, Tay and Murph along with Canadians Kurt and Adrian headed for a day at the Australia Zoo. Our visit coincided with halloween and within minutes of entering we witnessed a tiny child dressed head to toe in a wizard costume chasing a wild goanna. A very bizarre scene. We went to see a bird, snake and croc show in the 'crocoseum' and wandered through the open kangaroo paddy where Tay and Adrian got up close and personal and enjoyed a roo spooning session. Being too cheap to pay the $15 to cuddle a koala, we settled for a little stroke of the lower back. A memorial of Steve Irwin was moving and difficult to look at. Its hard to believe that he's no longer here as pictures of him dominate the park. All in all a lovely day, but we were all worn out and enjoyed a group nap on the bus on the way home.
An exciting evening followed when we realised just how much fun could be had without alcohol as we utilised Penny's extensive 'backpacker' wardrobe to play dress up. Colly, Adrian and Kurt were our victims....don't they look pretty?
Adrian looking very pretty
After our dress up session, we were all hyper like 3 year olds and so went outside to play volleyball in the dark. However, our skills left a lot to be desired and so 'Whatever Ball' was born. This is basically a rule-less version of hot potato which involves getting the ball under or over the net in any way possible. Boys, we'll see you at the 2012 London Olympics for the Canada/ England final!
Tay, new frock and one hell of a lot of cheese
Elaborate plans to earn some much needed cash in Brisbane were quickly quashed by our job agency when we were told we had to commit for a month. Being too honest for our own good, we admitted that we wouldn't be hanging around that long and so went shopping instead. Bugger. We met up with Andy and Paul from Fraser, Sash and Niaby Jeanette Cod (yes, another female friend) from the Whitsundays and Laura Tibbles a work colleague of Erin's and fellow featured traveller from the blogabond homepage (Vegtibbles). The day finally came to celebrate the 23rd anniversary of Helen Emily Taylor's birth. She stopped everyone in the street to inform them of this fact and soon found herself alone as the others disowned her. Yet again the day began with a sweet and balloon fest as we woke everyone up in our dorm by singing happy birthday at 7.30am when Tay opened her present of a beautiful new frock. Tay was excited about the prospect of her first hot birthday ever and caused a scene with a childish tantrum when we awoke to complete cloud cover and no sign of sun. Her spirits were lifted with a lunchtime falafel, the only thing that could brighten her mood. The day became a walk-a-thon as we saw the sights of Brisbane. We returned home to gather the troops and everyone drank excessive amounts of goon, apart from the birthday girl who splashed out on a bottle of sparkling rose. We headed to Fortitude Valley where we spent the night podium dancing in Birdie Num Num's.
The birthday mexican crew: cue cheese sweats en masse
Part two of the celebrations was an amazing Mexican meal where an over indulgence in cheese caused stomach cramps all round. Having passed on Australia Zoo, Erin, Penny and Niaby took a trip to Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary to cuddle one of the little marsupials. Koalas sleep 18 hours a day due to the low amount of carbs in their diets of eucalyptus leaves.
Penny and Donatello: a match made in heaven
They poo 80 times a day which Penny experienced 'first hand' when Donatello relieved himself on her.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on November 9, 2006 from Brisbane, Australia

A Day at the Races!
Surfers Paradise, Australia
Surfers Paradise
Surfers Paradise sticks to the formula of most resort towns, but on a bigger, flasher scale. Our arrival coincided with the Melbourne Cup. This is the biggest race day in Australia and we decided to use this as an excuse to get dressed up and spend the day drinking champagne at the Surfers Paradise Turf Club. Goon o'clock came early that day when we whipped it out at 11am. It was at this point that Erin Gillham loftily told two boys in our hostel kitchen, "its a bit early to be eating pizza isn't it?" with cup of dry white in hand. Kettle, pot, black. With our gladrags on we crammed like sardines onto an already over-full bus. There was no hiding the fact that everyone was already shamelessly checking out each other's attire, as would continue throughout the day. Although we looked the part we didn't stray far from our backpacker roots as on arrival we quickly polished off our stash of goon.
Niaby, Erin, Murph, Tay, Colly & Penny at the races
We then discovered the deal of the century, $16.50 bottles of Angas Brut bubbly, which was to be our drink of choice for the day. We were the last of the big spenders with our bets, as none of us placed more than $5 on a horse, mainly due to the fact that not one of us has a clue about racing. We gathered round a monitor to watch the Melbourne Cup race, eagerly clutching our tickets. Whilst Murph's horse Activation appeared to not even be in the race, Penny's was leading most of the way, but in the end it was neck and neck between Erin and Tay's Pop Rock and Colly's Delta Blues. It came down to a photo finish and Colly found herself with the winning ticket and smugly pocketed 55 bucks. After the race excitement, we headed for the live band and danced like idiots in the afternoon sunshine until it was time to catch our bus outta there.
Melbourne Cup day at Surfers Paradise
We landed on our feet when our free bus dropped us at Shooters Bar where we were given complimentary champagne and canopes. The most surreal part of the day came when we arrived home to discover it was only 7pm and therefore Home and Away time which we sat and watched whilst roaring drunk, thus perplexing the other hostel guests. The night continued in Melba's but the day caught up with us and we were tucked up in bed by midnight.
Tay, Kurty Wurty Flurty Murty and Penny
Having heard how amazing Byron Bay is from other travellers, we were disappointed when once again the weather let us down. Lifting our spirits was the fact that Adrian and Kurt were there to greet us. The main attraction in Byron is the lighthouse which one can enjoy a pleasant coastal stroll to. Having made it half way across the beach, a huge rainstorm began which left us dashing for cover to a nearby beach shack and opting for a taxi home.
Murph, Colly, Erin and Adrian at Cheeky Monkeys
We sampled the delights of the well known Cheeky Monkeys nightclub where tables serve as a dancefloor but we spent most of the night arm wrestling for no apparent reason. We bid Byron Bay farewell, but have plans to return on our way back up the coast.
Having passed through Sydney Airport twice, it was finally time to stop there. Arriving at 6.30am after an overnight bus was not an ideal start, especially as we then waited for 4 hours in a hostel lobby only to be told there were no beds. We moved on to the backpacker/ red light district of Kings Cross where the only available hostel was the skanky Mates Place. We spent a considerable amount of time wandering the city streets, saw the major sights and discovered one of the biggest lies of the modern world- the Sydney Opera House is not the sparkling white it appears in photos, but a yellowish baby vomit colour. Darling Harbour did live up to expectations though, and we took the time out to enjoy a drink in a harbourside bar, whilst watching the world go by.
Scruffy Murphys
We met up with the cockney boys from Cairns, Michael and Mark along with their Sydney friends. We went for a night out in Oxford Street, and to our unbelievable joy discovered that these boys revel in the 'stand in a circle whilst someone comedy dances in the middle,' as much as we do. Result. The major purpose of our brief stay in Sydney was a desperate search for accommodation over new year. After an initial panic that we'd end up in Mates Place for $70 a night, we stumbled across a guest house with an eccentric landlord. His one condition of stay was that we could, "roll a good spliff." We'd better get practising. Good job done, we're looking forward to returning for new year and partying hard!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on November 25, 2006 from Surfers Paradise, Australia

KL, Balloons and Towering Heights
Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
Sorry there has been such a delay in our blog of late, but we have been somewhat distracted by events in Singapore. Needless to say details will follow in due course.
So Kuala Lumpur, or as we are now qualified to call it, "KL". Things got off to a flying start as we were reunited with our favourite Northern boy, James Watkin.
As it was his birthday, James got free reign over the proceedings and we spent the day in Las Vegas- style theme park, complete with waterslides. {{PICT0237.jpg|left}} The waterslides weren't quite extreme enough for our tastes, but this was compensated for by the 'dry rides' which had a consistent theme of upside-down action, leaving us all green. {{PICT0248.jpg|right}}Good thing the birthday boy had selected McDonald's as his meal of choice and we sprinted there post-rollercoaster to combat the lingering queasiness.{{PICT0256.jpg|left}} After a three-course McDonald's the drinking commenced and we headed to the busiest nightspot in Chinatown, the Reggae Bar, where we danced the night away. Much fun was had with balloons, which became a running theme of the night(please refer to photo).{{PICT0272.jpg|right}}
Some readers will be surprised to hear that on waking the following morning, we felt that we had behaved impeccably. However upon returning sober the following night to watch The World Cup final, it transpired that we were now on first name terms with half the staff and the DJ-none of whom we recognised. The World Cup brought to light a few surprising revelations, namely we harbour secret desires for the extremely suave Jurgen Klinsmann and whilst watching Italy win the final we all developed a lustful appreciation for Cannavaro. For all those who share our passion, go to this link and turn you speakers up for full enjoyment. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHj1Q--MjVA&search=cannavaro
In KL, we stayed in the bustling hub of Chinatown where we enjoyed some amazing food, most particularly a buffet involving a variety of components, the most noteworthy being the pumpkin, which we've been obsessed with for the whole trip but is rarely available. {{DSCN0720.jpg|left}} We spent a considerable amount of time meandering around the city streets and came away with a good impression of the place. {{DSCN0747.jpg|right}} We wandered around the lake gardens, went up the KL Tower by night and the Petronas Towers by day for spectacular city views. A lot of time was spent in KL's fast quantity of shiny shopping malls, complete with roller-coasters, ice rinks and amazing selections of food. All in all we liked KL. {{PICT0309.jpg|left}}
Moved on for a quick stop in Melacca, a historic colonial town with Dutch, Portugese and British influence. Not a vast array of things to do, but after visiting the fort, we passed an interesting hour at the Museum of Enduring Beauty. This was slightly random as it had nothing to do with Melacca or indeed Malaysia, but was interesting none-the-less as we all now have a detailed knowledge of obscure tribal customs, carried out in the name of 'beauty'.
Looking forward to a rendezvous with Dad G in Singapore, we headed to our sixth country.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on July 27, 2006 from Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Farewell Asia!
Singapore, Singapore
We arrived to find that the chivalrous James Watkin, over excited about our arrival had paid upfront for our first 2 nights at the Prince of Wales hostel in Little India. Embracing the local ethnicity, we went for a curry at a local curry house where we ate with our fingers off over-sized banana leaves - when in Rome... Having failed to find an indie club to take
James for his birthday in KL, he was eager to take us to an open-air indie festival along the water front which he had heard about on the grapevine. Upon exiting the MRT, we were wowed by the setting and general atmosphere of the city, we immediately knew we would love Singapore. Unfortunately the indie festival didn't turn up trumps although we got a surprise show in the subway because apparently the youth of Singapore congregate there for amateur break-dancing practice. We had all been nervous about arriving in Singapore because we tend to cross roads in a free-spirited, haphazard kind of way. Unfortunately in Singapore they fine you $500 for this. However, within 2 crossings we had tired of waiting for the little green man to start flashing and reverted back to our former style of making a run for it.{{S5020154.jpg|left}}
The next day we preened ourselves in preparation for the arrival of Andrew Nigel Gillham, herein referred to as Dad G. Just after noon his first suggestion was to go for a beer and of course we didn't decline. At this point Dad G whipped out our matching T-shirts printed with the name of our infamous blog and the camcorder which was to document our activities over the next few days. After our Tiger beers were empty, our new tour guide escorted us to the Royce chocolate shop where we messily enjoyed squares of chocolate truffle heaven. We headed to Dad G's hotel where we picked up our long awaited care packages from home - thanks Mums, Dads, Tom and Rose. The overwhelming theme was a mountain of pastelle cotton granny panties. Pat Taylor you certainly outdid yourself, we counted 18 pairs in total, these will keep Tay going for at least the next 8 months.{{PICT0369.jpg|right}} Dad G was relieved to have made it through customs without being searched as even with his diplomatic skills he would have struggled to explain a suitcase seething with female underwear en route to Singapore.{{PICT0365.jpg|left}}
Next a real treat was had as Dad G took us up the Swissotel tower where cosmopolitan bar Equinox occupies the top floor. We felt a little out of place sipping our first champagne and cocktails in 4 months whilst sporting our scruffy knapsacks and day-glo market clothes. The bubbly gave us quite an appetite and we couldn't turn down the offer of dinner. Dad G had a hankering for meat so we all swaggered to Bobby Ramones in the Chymes complex where the ribs, burgers and chicken went down a storm. We rushed back to our hostel for our last night with James :( and reverted back to being 14 as we were forced to sip vodka sitting on the curb outside 7-Eleven. In honour of Erik we indulged in a few rounds of his favourite drinking game 'fick dein bus'. Then it was on to the ingeniously named 'Baa Bar Black Chic' a funky little club in Little India, where we found the lasers, smoke-machines and electro surprisingly pleasing. Our hangovers lead to a particularly emotional farewell to our last friend from Asia, James 'I'll give you that one for free' Watkin. We miss you loads, its all about Stuttgart '07! {{S5020171.jpg|right}}
That evening we were cordially invited to the home of Chris White where we also rendezvoused with Lindsey Neary, the ginger bombshell- Tay's friends from uni. Chris' Dad David cooked up a sumptuous barbecue with strawberries and Scottish fudge for dessert. After we had had our fill of dinner, Chris took us for a couple of drinks at Clarke Quay, a swanky row of bars along the waterfront, where we were introduced to a few of his friends from Singapore. The following day we had a lunch date with Chris and Lindsey at the Tanglin Country Club at which David is a member. The lunch was delicious- thanks again David!
Having visited every Chinatown in every city along the way, we felt it only fair to see what Singapore's had to offer us. We enjoyed a cup of chinese tea and a stroll around the market.
One tourist attraction that we knew we would enjoy was the night safari. This involved a tram ride through the wilds of Africa and Asia and their nocturnal creatures. We saw a host of animals, some of which we'd never even heard of- who knew bearcats and hogbadgers existed? Particularly exciting was the bat enclosure in which we had close encounters with giant fruitbats which left Colly and Chris cowering in the corner (complete with girly squeals from Chris). After the tram tour we attended the 'Creatures of the Night' show where we came up close and personal with a whole array of animals. A keen love for otters was formed after watching Pedro, a very well-trained specimen, demonstrate how to pick up and recycle rubbish. {{PICT0353.jpg|right}}
Next day brought the move we'd all been waiting for, our parents had booked us a couple of rooms at the hotel Dad G was staying in. It was finally time to swap dorms and communal showers for double beds and en-suites, and we revelled in it. Surrounded by clean towels and hot showers, it proved the perfect environment in which to groom and prepare ourselves for the glamorous evening ahead. {{DSCN0793.jpg|left}}First stop the infamous Raffles Hotel for Singapore Slings, which went down so favourably we consumed two rounds. We entered into the tradition of Raffles by discarding our peanut shells on the floor of the bar. Ironic how the one place you are allowed to litter in the city is its most renowned hotel. After having been introduced to some of Dad G's colleagues, we selected a Chinese seafood restaurant for dinner.{{PICT0358.jpg|right}} The menu was vast and largely alien to us, so we left ordering in Sharon's capable hands. This proved to be a wise decision when plate upon plate of delicious food continued to arrive from the kitchen- a unanimous favourite dish was crayfish. Proving you needed to be an expert to make such successful decisions, Dad G floundered in the wine selecting with a schoolboy error of ordering Chinese wine which turned out to be sherry. A lovely evening was perfectly rounded off by a cocktail amidst the grandeur of the Fullerton hotel.
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Our last night in Asia was definitely one to remember. After drinks at Chris' we went to The Ministry of Sound. Chris' Dad David rose to legendary status as he decided to join us, and showed us up on the dancefloor. Complete with fountains, escalators and flashing dance floors it was certainly a lot trendier than the places we have been frequenting during the trip. A 4am McDonalds feast brought the night to a close and sealed the deal on a fantastic last night in Asia.
Sharon, thank you for your insider's knowledge of Singapore and for the lovely gifts.
Chris and David, thanks so much for the hospitality and the amazing night in the Ministry of Sound!
Many thanks to Dad G for making our stay in Singapore so memorable and thanks also to the other Mums and Dads, sorry you couldn't be there to share it with us!
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written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on July 29, 2006 from Singapore, Singapore

Everybody Needs Good Neighbours...
Melbourne, Australia
Lucky boy "Dylan Timmons"
We’re sorry it has been so long since our last entry but due to constant work we’ve been more like the non-smug un-adventurers of late. We arrived in Melbourne on the coldest November day since 1953 after a 17-hour bus marathon, wearing short shorts and vests. As we’ve learnt from our time in Melbourne such freak weather conditions aren’t unusual with one day being freezing cold and the next boiling hot not unlike a hair dryer.
Check out those biceps
The current bushfires have added to the weird weather as the city is enshrouded in a smoky haze. We began our stay in Melbourne in the backpacker district St. Kilda and the first item on our agenda was to book on to the next Neighbour’s night. We may struggle to convey our excitement and unequaled joy as we sat in anticipation of meeting the Neighbour’s stars. The atmosphere was electric with frenzied English backpackers/Neighbours fanatics eagerly awaiting their idols whilst viewing classic Neighbours moments on the big screen featuring Scott and Charlene’s wedding and the passing of Helen Daniels which caused swells of emotion and nostalgia. The room reached fever pitch as the door swung open and in walked Lynette Scully, Boyd Hoyland and Dylan Timmons. We had found our nirvana. The night involved a meet and greet and photo opportunity with each TV legend which caused much hysteria. The night climaxed when we rocked with the Doc, Karl Kennedy, and his band “The Waiting Room”. They wowed us with their musical genius and we were left weak at the knees with Doctor Kennedy oozing sex appeal and flexing his guns of steel.
The steroids did you proud Boyd
Lyn looked much younger and attractive in real life- a MILF if ever there was one
Overall we could not have had a nicer time, the experience was everything we had hoped it would be and more. However the night was bittersweet and it was to be our last Penelope Jean Crocker, our favourite ever female traveling companion. Penny, you leaving us was a big fat negative, I mean “What the f**k?!, who does that?! Who leaves a full suitcase in a dorm room?!” ;-)
Our Neighbours experience in Melbourne would not have been complete without a trip to Ramsay Street.
The girls outside the home of Harold Bishop
After suffering constant jibes about our love of all things “Neighbours” at the hands of our landlord “Twang” he eventually agreed to drive us to the show’s homeland, the legend that is “Ramsay Street” otherwise known as Pin Oak. We arrived in the street with cries of disbelief, “this isn’t it, its too small!”
A game of cricket in Ramsay Street
But after surveying the houses and shouting such comments as “That’s the House of Trousers!” we realized that we were in fact in Ramsay Street for real. After being photographed in front of each and every house we enjoyed a quick game of Ramsay Street cricket and now feel that we can leave Melbourne fulfilled.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on December 21, 2006 from Melbourne, Australia

Deck the Halls with Boughs of Holly, Tra La La La La La La La La La La
Melbourne, Australia
Bourke Street, Melbourne
Melbourne from the Docklands
Our main aim of our stay in Melbourne was to earn some dollars so we signed up to an agency and due to the pre-Christmas rush have been working non-stop ever since. Due to work commitments in the city center we moved into a share house on Drummond Street. It proved to be basically like a massive student house, full of 26 backpackers and run by a 38 year old landlord “Twang” who from 10am onwards may always be found clutching a red wine bottle in one hand and beer can in the other.
Australian creatures we see on our way home from work
Our work has taken us to bars, gentlemen’s clubs, private homes and posh hotels across the city. The monotony of work has been slightly relieved by the meeting of such new friends as Jen from Canada, Daniel from Mexico and Manu from France. Recently we worked at the Telstra Dome for the Robbie Williams concert.
Robbie Williams only good in concert if its free
Whilst the fans had paid $100+ for the privilege of being there we saw the entire concert for free and despite being sceptical beforehand we found it surprisingly enjoyable. We are now officially over waitressing and never want to serve food and drink again.
Erin, Tay, Levi, Trej and Murph at the RAF base
Melbourne provided the opportunity to catch up with some old friends as we journeyed out to the RAF base to cheer on Levi and Trej from Sydney in their touch footy final. We met these boys on the legendary trip to Prague celebrating Murph’s 21st birthday and the subsequent weekend in Oxford, and have looked forward to meeting them again in Australia ever since. It was a real treat to catch up with the boys again and we enjoyed reliving the abundance of private jokes from Prague ‘bbbbbbbbbbbbbyyyyyyyyy the way’. The post-footy barbeque bash wasn’t exactly “The Biggest Club in Middle Europe” or “Pleasuredome” but we still had a thoroughly lovely time.
Out on Chapel Street
We rendezvoused yet again with Sash and Naiby from the Whitsundays and Kurty Wurty Flurty from Fraser Island and enjoyed a couple of nights pre-drinking in new recruit Alex’s swanky flat before heading to trendy Chapel Street and then “Honky Tonks” a renowned Melbourne club.
The girls with their arch rival Ollie Johnson
After having already met (Veg)Tibbles in Brisbane it was time for more Blogabond fusion as we met up with Ollie Johnson of “A Man from Cockshutt” fame who replaced us as the featured traveller on the Blogabond Homepage (not that we’re bitter about it). Hope you have a good Christmas in Canada Ollie. Colly also had the pleasure of enjoying a meal with some old Australian friends of her parents in their Melbourne home.
Alison, Jim, Colly and Annita
A bonus of living in Melbourne has been the chance to spend time with Murph’s relatives Uncle Peter, Auntie Lai sie, Sian and the very smelly Rosie. Their hospitality was particularly appreciated by Murph as she recuperated from an operation to extract a troublesome wisdom tooth.
Rosie, Murph and Erin enjoying some sunshine at the Beach House
This was followed by a very smug respite from work as we visited their beach house on the Mornington Peninsula. There we enjoyed two lazy days with plenty of wine and a couple of fantastic meals out. Thanks very much again guys!
We’re finding it hard to feel Christmassy here in Australia. The decorations look all wrong and they don’t seem to embrace the carols or the cheesy seasonal TV as much as we do in England. However as work is winding down we’re trying our best to find the Christmas Spirit by playing East 17’s “Stay Another Day” on repeat and hiring Christmas films. We’re going to miss you all lots during the festive season and hope our absence doesn’t leave too big a hole in your Christmas fun! Happy holidays x x x
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on December 21, 2006 from Melbourne, Australia

Things lost/ stolen/ broken in Asia
Singapore, Singapore
1) Erin's camera
2) Murph's camera
3) Tay's camera
4) Colly's camera
5) Murph's camera #2
6) Tay's camera #2
7) Erin's phone
8) Tay's phone
9) Colly's phone
10) 2 purses
11) 1 passport
12) 1 Ipod
13) $300 US
14) 1 credit card
15) 1 debit card
16) 1 driving licence
17) Infinite pairs of flip flops and knickers
Hopefully we'll have more luck down under........
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on August 3, 2006 from Singapore, Singapore

Baaaawwwwlllllll Shhhaaaaaaaaaaaane!
Melbourne, Australia
After losing our mojo from weeks of work, we were very excited about our big night out to say farewell to our housemates.
The crew at 93 Drummond Street
A vast group of 20 plus left 93 Drummond Street in a convoy of excited revellers. Our venue of choice was Metros and after a raucous night there we left a ledgendary 'house secrets' list in our wake.
Our Melbourne Landlords: Twang and Ranj
On Christmas Eve we bid farewell to our house mates as we upgraded to Murphs Aunty and Uncles house, along with Claire, Murph's cousin and her husband Tim. It didn't feel like Christmas Eve without the traditional yearly piss-up at the White Hart/ Cricketers.
The Australian Murphys: Lai Sie, Sian, Rosie and Peter
However, in an attempt to feel more Christmassy we watched 'Love Actually', 'Elf' and sang Christmas carols. A BBQ and plenty of wine followed which kick-started our immense eating and drinking extravaganza in the house of the Murphy feeders.
Sian and Rosie fighting over presents
For our first Australian Christmas we woke to cold, wind and rain - yes, the coldest Christmas day on record in Melbourne. To add to the joyous occasion, Colly and Tay headed off to work. Luckily their shift was brightened up by a visit from (a morbidly obese) Santa.
Meanwhile, back at the house preparations for the most elaborate and eclectic Christmas dinner ever had begun. Not satisfied by a standard roast, Aunty Lai Sie added such delights as roast chicken, ham, red snapper, cray fish and a mountain of prawns. Everyone got involved with the cooking, with particular praise going to Tim Cairns who became head chef for the day. Santa managed to find us in Australia as we opened parcels from home full of wonderous treats. Our sacks were fuller than expected as we recieved some gifts from surrogate parents Peter and Lai Sie.
Tim aka Jamie Oliver getting involved with a crayfish
Thank you for the beautiful necklaces and bracelets, we wear them every day. We managed to spend an impressive ten hours around the dining room table, only moving to retrieve another bottle of wine from the fridge.
Feeling somewhat more rotund and fuzzy-headed the next day, we rose for a day of cricket.
Matching knitwear at the Ashes
Yes, thats right cricket fans, we attended the Boxing Day test match in Melbourne thanks to the amazing Rosie 'poo' Murphy who managed to buy 8 tickets for the sold out event. England played appallingly, but at least this meant we got to see the entire team bat and watch Freddy get a couple of wickets in the last few minutes.
We had the privilege of meeting Shane Warne
Cricket in action at the MCG
We suppose we should note that we also viewed Shane 'fat bastard' Warne get his 700th test wicket. This was quite fun as we got to heckle, 'bbbbbaaaaawwwwlllll SSSShhhaaaaaaaaaaane' continuously for the rest of the day, much to the entertainment of the Aussie fans that surrounded us.
We would like to thank the Aussie Murphys once again for their generous hospitality, hope we didn't eat you out of house and home! Hope everyone at home had a very merry Christmas x
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on January 6, 2007 from Melbourne, Australia

We Have Moved
Wellington, New Zealand
Hi All,
Some people have told us that it takes a while for our blog to upload, so we have started a new chapter for New Zealand to try and make it faster.
If you use the short link www.blogabond.com/murph and have no problems keep doing what you're doing. But if you find things slow, try accessing the site by using the above short link and click on The Smug Adventures Down Under, which appears on our home page.
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on August 10, 2006 from Wellington, New Zealand

Rave in the city
Sydney, Australia
The Opera House
We officially love Sydney. We quickly established that getting jobs was out of the question for such a short time, so we were left with a two week window for fun and games. On our first night out in Sydney, we all got a little over-excited, this can be testified by Murph's grown up cousins Claire and Tim who bravely accepted our invitation to backpacker dive on Oxford Street, 'the Gaff'. We blame our incoherence entirely on Tim and those sambucca shots he fed us. We drunkenly slurred at them that they were our 'couple idol' and in return Claire declared us to be 'favourite cousin and friends.' Can you feel the love?
The Hartley crew at Empire
A major reason for our intense love of Sydney was that we had lots of friends there. Rob, Charlie and Adam from home in the village, Niaby, Sash and Rhiannon. Also there were the permanent residents, Pat, Millsy and Dr Dan from Asia days, Trej from Prague and ex-Guildford boy James. We want to thank them all for helping us get truly involved in Sydney life! Everyone in their life time should have a new year in Sydney and we're glad we can tick it off our list of experiences.
Happy New Year!
More important than the fireworks (which we watched from a penthouse room in the Intercontinental, dahling) was the fact that we were escorted by a bunch of international investment bankers to an exclusive party in a swanky beachside apartment in Tamarama. Luckily we were altogether at midnight when there was a comical rendition of Auld Lange Syne, slightly tricky after having had plenty of champers and not a clue of what the words are.
Caught in the moment of Auld Lang Syne
Although new year was great, our main celebrations were to be on January 1st 2007- Field Day. Thanks to Pat and Millsy's hot tip back in Cambodia we had learnt about one of Sydney's most infamous new year day's festivals. It is a 12 hour dance music marathon which we'd bought our tickets for back in September. After waking to pouring rain and with vicious post-new year hangovers, the thought of dancing in a field and drinking warm beer, was not ideal.
Loving every second at Field Day
However, a 2 hour nap later, we awoke to blue skies and felt much more refreshed. We followed the hoardes to the Domain, a large park in the city centre, where at 3pm we purchased our first drink of the day. We discovered a surprising treat in cans of Smirnoff Black Double. After spending the last four months slagging of Aussie boys for drinking this alco-pop, we weren't shy in admitting that after a mere can and a half we were already feeling the effects. What a marvellous invention. Whilst raving to Mylo in the 4pm sunshine with the city skyline as our backdrop, the comment of the day went to Helen Patricia Murphy, who overwhelmed with pure emotion exclaimed, "we must be the four luckiest girls in the world!" In goofy chorus the other girls agreed. How smug.
Drunk drowned rats, thank you Smirnoff!
As night fell, the clouds rolled in and much to our delight, a rain dance ensued. We were four little drowned rats, yet could not have been happier. Our love for the day is indescribable, so we will spare you any more shameless adulation (but just for the record, it was amazing, we loved it and one of the best days ever. Ever. )
New year over, it was time to explore a bit of Sydney and so we saw all the major sights. Our base was King's Cross, which despite its negative image amongst residents of Sydney, we loved dearly. Having now seen the opera house in sunshine we would like to retract a previous comment referring to it as being the colour of baby vomit. Its quite nice actually.
The Bridge
We were driven over the harbour bridge by old friend Trej and explored the Rocks, Sydney's oldest precinct. Sydney beaches provide an escape from the city, Bondi being the most famous, although we preferred the quieter Coogee and especially enjoyed a marvellous coastal walk between the two. A picturesque ferry ride took us to Manly, the busiest beach we've seen our whole trip. This day trip also involved a long-awaited visit to Cold Rock ice creamery. To fill you in on what this amazing delicacy involves, you pick an ice cream, a sauce and your favourite sweets or chocolate bar and watch as they are kneaded into a magical concoction. The results were extraordinary.
Coogee woogee smoogee
We began to have withdrawals from cheesy day trips and so set out on a tour to the nearby Blue Mountains, a mountain range enveloped in a blue haze due to lingering vapours from an abundance of eucalyptus trees. We were driven around the vicinity by a crazy tour guide, with a quick stop off at his Grandma's house to pick up our delicious packed lunches.
The Three Sisters, the Blue Mountains
We visited Wentworth Falls, the three sisters and descended a giant cliff-side staircase of 1000 steps. Luckily those stairs were a one-way ticket as we boarded the world's steepest railway (featured in the Guiness book of records)to return us to the top. Another of Australia's must-dos which we left until our last week, was the $5 steak. On personal recommendation from Sydney-sider Patrick Hoolahan, we chowed down at Captain Cook Hotel eatery in Surry Hills, and can now testify that we rate Aussie beef 10 out of 10.
One messy night at Chinese Laundry
For our last night in Sydney we decided to go out with a bang and so joined Pat and Millsy at Chinese Laundry, one of Sydney's top night spots. To sum the night up, we didn't go to bed, and Murph and Colly found themselves dancing in a 'day club' at 11am on a Sunday morning. Goodbye Sydney!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on January 16, 2007 from Sydney, Australia

A sailor's life for us!
Suva, Fiji
As we stepped off the plane at Nadi airport in Fiji it felt good to be back on the road. As there isn't much to see on the mainland we were lucky that our resort was very pleasing and a perfect location for relaxation and adjustment to 'Fiji time'. Our first relaxing day at the Sky Lodge was interrupted by the appearance of a crazy girl who, as we watched in shock, ran around the pool hysterically screaming at the staff. The scene was vaguely amusing to watch until she screamed "get off me or I'll sacrifice you, I'm going to have to kill you". By the next day there was a distinct lack of crazy girl, we can only hope that she was hospitalised somewhere. Apparently the coup wasn't what we needed to worry about.
Although we hadn't heard great things about Nadi, excited to be somewhere more "out-there" than Australia we spent an evening exploring the town/one street. We were obviously out of practice at handling local harrassment as within minutes of arriving we were sitting on a mat in the back of a souvenir shop accepting kava and a welcoming ceremony. Favoured by Fijians, Kava consists of a root ground to a powder and mixed with water, the result is a tasteless muddy water-like drink supposed to have calming qualities. The 'free' welcoming ceremony inevitably ended in us being asked for money for the "village"- rookie mistake. Cheap food means it was back to dining out and we were delighted to find a local restaurant with a delicious curry for a measly price.
The next day we boarded the ferry early and headed north to Kuata one of the smaller Yasawa islands. The resort we stayed at being the only settlement on the island, it was our own personal paradise. Similarly to our activities on the mainland the day consisted of doing basically nothing, the only difference being this time we did it in hammocks. Our sloth-like behaviour was only interrupted by hearing the conch being sounded for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Tay having a really nice time doing the Bula Dance
In the evening completely out of our control, we were dragged up onto our feet and forced to partake in the traditional 'Bula dance', pretty much a Fijian Macarena. It may have been slightly more appropriate had there been more than ten of us, we weren't full of recently scoffed dinner and weren't stone-cold sober. The most embarrassing part was the sequence in which we had to bunny-hop whilst holding the stranger in front of you's hand through their legs.Sly little Colly by nominating herself as designated photogrpaher managed to avoid being part of this car-crash and instead spectated.
Naviti Island Sunset
The next day we hopped back on the ferry travelling North to bigger island Naviti, where we stayed at the Korovou resort. We were greeted by a group of extremely friendly Fijians and were serenaded with a welcome song as we reached the beach. Our first night as it was Sunday, we were treated to a special barbeque buffet where the Coral Parrot fish was a tasty little number. This lured us into a false sense of security as over the next couple of days the food deteriorated into tasteless stodge, following a pattern of noodles, potatoes and rice, all with no flavour. From the resort's veranda we spent the evening watching baby reef sharks coming into the shallows to feed on the fish.
Hammock Loving
The rest of our time on the island was very educational as we enrolled in classes such as sarong tieing, coconut husking and fish feeding. Invaluably we now know how to craft a pair of shorts using just a sarong, one for the CV. Erin and Murph stopped off for one more night of island frollicks on Mantaray, as Colly and Tay enjoyed a romantic candlelit dinner for two back on the mainland. The girls spent an evening drinking with fellow Mantaray guests particularly enjoying the company of Colonel Tom May, a retired U.S. Special Ops pilot. Originally hailing from California he has spent the last ten years sailing the seven seas aboard his yacht Optimum Trust, in the company of Rambo the Yorkshire Terrier. After several Fijian beers Tom offered to take all four of the Smug Adventurers on a day-trip aboard his yacht.
Colonel Tom May
And so it was the next day we clambered gracefully into a dingy and stepped aboard. Joining us on our adventure was an extremely stereotypically French lady by the name of Caroline/Cathryn (we're still not sure which one). Oooh La La. The motley crew set their compasses north, put the boat on auto-pilot and enjoyed a leisurely gin and tonic whilst the boat chugged along. Sailing is extremely hard work it must be said.
Hot tub on Sea
On starboard side we saw where TV history was made when Bounty island became the set of "Celebrity Love Island" and on the port side we passed the island on which Tom Hanks starred in Castaway. We reached our destination Beachcomber just in time for their buffet luncheon followed by beers in the spa which overlooked the sea.
It was about turn and on to South Sea island for a spot of snorkelling and anchored down for a stunning sunset. The evening passed in a haze as Tom's wicked cocktail concoctions left us a little light headed. Thank you Tom for a lovely day and helping us bid Fiji farewell in style. See you in 2009 for our Amazonian adventure!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on January 30, 2007 from Suva, Fiji

Aloha, but not as you know it...
Honolulu, United States
Welcome to Americana
After having attempted getting bumped from our flight to United States for a lovely 200 pounds, we arrived in Honolulu airport only 1 hour later than scheduled and without the prize money we had already mentally spent. It was clear immediately that we were in the good old US of A, a land of fast food, badly dressed tourists, chain restaurants and huge malls. We were staying at a lovely hostel with friendly staff just a stone´s throw away from Waikiki Beach.
Waikiki Beach
There were 2 main items on our agenda for our 4 day stay in United States and they were to see Pearl Harbour and go to a traditional Luau. The visit to Pearl Harbour proved very interesting as we took a trip by boat to the USS United States Memorial, the wreck still visible, a tomb of the 1,177 navy crew who perished back on December 7th 1941.
USS Arizona Memorial
The second item on the agenda however was a bit of an eyebrow raiser to say the least. After having had expectations of incredible dancing, grass skirts, tropical sunsets and a traditional United Statesan feast, things took a turn for the worst when we arrived on the edge of an industrial park and were given bright yellow ponchos as the depressing drizzle began. Next up we met our hosts for the evening who were nauseating and hard to watch as they crooned an exceptionally cheesy love duet to which the audience were urged to hold hands and embrace their neighbours.
A magical moment at Germaine´s Luau
In a typically English fashion we awkwardly held hands and cringed inside whilst the American families around us were feeling the love and having a thoroughly spiritual time. Just so everybody knows,´Aloha` is not simply a hello, but a complex feeling of love, friendship and togetherness - cue gag reflex. The evening did not redeem itself and even we, who are easily pacified by a hearty meal, were shocked by the school canteen quality tucka. Somehow we don`t believe that a traditional United Statesan dish is limp, soggy battered fish and awful chocolate cake.
Poncho porn
The entertainment for the evening was a Butlins style cabaret with far too much audience participation and ridiculous UV costumes which we refuse to accept the Polynesians wore back in the day.
A whole lot of cheesecake
Other than these excursions, we explored the infamous Waikiki Beach but due to lack of sunshine and high winds, we were unable to enjoy it to its full potential. Luckily our dire culinary experience at the Luau was more than compensated for when we dined at the incredible Cheesecake Factory. The extensive menu was more like a book than a mere pamphlet. We had found cheesecake heaven!
written by  Murph, Tay, Colly and Erin on February 5, 2007 from Honolulu, United States

Oaxaca Market

Zocala

Drunk star gazing

Aly in birthday wrestling mask

Colly and Aly show up the Mexicans?!?

Carnage?

Team England

Pyramid of the Sun

A magical moment at Germaine´s Luau

Welcome to Americana

Poncho porn

USS Arizona Memorial

A whole lot of cheesecake

Waikiki Beach

Caught in the moment of Auld Lang Syne

The Hartley crew at Empire

The Three Sisters, the Blue Mountains

Happy New Year!

Loving every second at Field Day

Drunk drowned rats, thank you Smirnoff!

Coogee woogee smoogee

The Bridge

One messy night at Chinese Laundry

The Opera House

Our Melbourne Landlords: Twang and Ranj

Cricket in action at the MCG

Matching knitwear at the Ashes

The Australian Murphys: Lai Sie, Sian, Rosie and Peter

We had the privilege of meeting Shane Warne

Sian and Rosie fighting over presents

The incredible Christmas feast

Tim aka Jamie Oliver getting involved with a crayfish

Out on Chapel Street

Alison, Jim, Colly and Annita

Rosie, Murph and Erin enjoying some sunshine at the Beach House

Robbie Williams only good in concert if its free

Bourke Street, Melbourne

The girls outside the home of Harold Bishop

A game of cricket in Ramsay Street

The girls with their arch rival Ollie Johnson

Melbourne from the Docklands

Australian creatures we see on our way home from work

Check out those biceps

Erin, Tay, Levi, Trej and Murph at the RAF base

Lucky boy "Dylan Timmons"

The steroids did you proud Boyd

Lyn looked much younger and attractive in real life- a MILF if ever there was one

Melbourne Cup day at Surfers Paradise

Niaby, Erin, Murph, Tay, Colly & Penny at the races

Scruffy Murphys

Surfers Paradise

Murph, Colly, Erin and Adrian at Cheeky Monkeys

Tay, Kurty Wurty Flurty Murty and Penny

Adrian looking very pretty

Penny and Donatello: a match made in heaven

Tay, new frock and one hell of a lot of cheese

The birthday mexican crew: cue cheese sweats en masse

Sunset over Brisbane

Tay, Murph and Steve Irwin

Under the Koalas sign for the last time

From top to bottom: Tay's, Murph's, Erin's, Colly's

Erin looking beautiful with birthday presents

Happy Hour at Pier Bar

Some free wine lovin' at Gilligans

Mark and Michael

Boat action on the Great Barrier Reef

Georgina the Turtle (Tay hates her)

Warning crocs about!

Tay at the white party

Night out in Gilligans

Colly, Rhiannon and Murph

The girls with James Watkin

Larking about in the Botanical Gardens

Drinking at the Speights Factory

An incredible amount of sushi

Horseriding in Dunedin

Tay and Murph making chocolate at the Cadbury's Factory

Colly struggling with horse

Night out in Wellington

Self-timer action in front of Fox Glacier

Lake Matheson

Jump-suit porn

Skydiving

In a crevass

Colly coming in to land

Sunset over Lake Wanaka

A lot of glare

On top of Franz Josef

Toilet visit at Shantytown

Seal relaxing on rock

Driving fire truck at Shantytown

Erin pole dancing around bunk bed

Art Deco Porn

Art Deco Car

Matching golden shoes

J to the X (put on by accident)

Dad G with Chinese wine

Colly and Tay with Singapore Slings

Night over Singapore from the Swissotel Tower

A Singapore Sling

Chris and David at the Ministry of Sound

Erin and Dad G

Tay, Chris and the Ginger Bombshell

The gang at the Ministry of Sound

Pant porn

The crew with Dad G

Dad G and Sharon

The Chinese Seafood Feast

Everyone at dinner

Kuala Lumpur

The Petronas Tower

Erin and James Watkin on his birthday

Birthday Boy James Watkin

The crew at Reggae Bar

The Theme Park

Tay and James upside down

Water slides

James Watkin at Reggae Bar

The Petronas Tower at night

Proper BOH

FHM Shoot

The boys in a lovers embrace

The infamous death bucket

Chicken Island

View from our hotel in Krabi

The girls and Sam all slightly inebriated

Murph and adorable puppy

The German Legend Erik Bonhorst

Ryan James Russell jumping through fire

Day-glo clothing galore

Dr Dan, Murph and Patrick in the Heart of Darkness

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers

Skulls at the Killing Fields

Our singing Vietnamese Tour Guide

Erin not loving the Snake Wine

Boat Trip to the Mekong Delta

Vietnamese Lady collecting snails in the Mekong

Cowboys working out on the beach

Panicked cyclo ride

Murph and her hair twin

Vodka buckets- the calm before the storm

Robbi-s first experience with a bum squirter

Drunken stupor at Why Not Bar

The crew in Guava

Erin's ruined passport

Attempting to Kayak in Laos

Murph being harrassed by small children

Thai village

Small village boy

Sunset on trek

Long neck tribe

"Waterfall" on trek

Our trek group

Colly on first tuk-tuk

Elephant riding on trek

Being entertained by village children

Elephant riding

Overboard on bamboo raft

Our first tuk-tuk ride

Erin= dog

Erin holding up temple

Erin is dog

Erik, James, Murph, Millsy and Matt getting involved in UV

Erin is Buddha

The girls on one of the first days looking very pale indeed

Erin impersonating Buddhist statues