]]> Fri, 23 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208434 0 32.71528 -117.15639 Last Wednesday we rushed my grandmother to the hospital. She was incoherent, had a temperature of 102, and hadn't passed any urine in over 12 hours. When we got her to the hospital, we had to make a decision to either intibation her or let her pass. My grandmother is DNR, but we didn't have the paperwork with us and we were not at her usual hospital. In a quick decision, my cousin decided to intibate her. This was done to prolong her life for a short time so that her children and grandchildren can say their goodbyes.

On Friday, January 6th, my mom and her brothers and sisters met to discuss when to take out the intibation tube. I can only imagine what that conversation was like, but I'm definitely sure it wasn't a fun conversation to be a part of. They decided to take my grandmother off the ventilator on Saturday afternoon.

That night, my cousins and I decided to go to AJ's house for dinner and games. It was a chance for us to relax before what we knew was going to be a long and emotional day. We ended up playing the original Nintendo (Kings of the Beach, Bommerman, and Off Road) for about three hours. Then, as always, played Scategories until 3 AM.

January 7th was a very long day. They extibated my grandmother at 1PM and we were told that she would pass within the hour. At 4PM, my grandmother still alive and with good vital signs, everyone decided to go home and get some rest. I decided to stay at the hospital to give the rest of my family the opportunity to sleep. During that time I was alone with my grandmother and had the chance to say good-bye to her.

My grandmother taught my me and my cousins how to read. She was our pre-school teacher. I remember her cutting up cardboard boxes and making flash cards with phonic sounds on them. So the flash cards would have say "at" on one side and the letters on separate flash cards. She would put the two together to make c-at or b-at or f-at. This would go on and on. I attribute where I am today to my grandmother. She gave all of us the foundation that we needed to succeed in school and we have all done that. I thanked my grandmother for this.

At midnight, it was planned that some other cousins would come and relieve me. At that time, I came home to get some rest.

January 8th...I woke up at 6 again because I couldn't sleep. I knew that my grandmother was going to go soon. Before I left, her kidneys had already shut down...so it was just a waiting game. By 1:22, my grandmother finally passed away.

At the funeral for my grandfather, my grandmother told him to wait for her because she would join him soon. None of us thought it would be within two weeks. It's kind of sweet and romantic. After 58 years of marriage, they are now on another journey together.

I've been asked countless times how I am doing. Truthfully...I'm numb. I've also been asked about how I'm taking it as my grandmother passed away on my birthday. To me, it's sort of an honor to share this day with her.

So now it appears that I am here for another week. The funeral is being set for either Wednesday or Thursday. On Friday, my cousins and I are planning on going snowboarding. On Sunday, I should be back in San Diego. I can't wait!

James
]]> Mon, 09 Jan 2006 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208433 0 38.58167 -121.49333
Today, my mom asked if I could stay the rest of the week. One of my aunts is sick...and won't be able to take her shift during this week. Even though my grandfather has passed, my grandmother still needs constant attention. Thus, the shifts continue. Without hesitation, I have agreed to stay in Sacramento for the rest of this week. I need to be here. My grandparents took care of me and my cousins when we were younger. They practically raised us. While I couldn't be here to repay my grandfather by taking care of him, I can at least help out for this week and help take care of my grandmother.

After the New Years Toast, we ended up playing Scattergories. We divided ourselves into teams of six. Scattergories is so much easier and more fun played in teams. I was very surprised by my little cousins (about 7 to 12) who were coming up with the most clever of answers. I don't know how one of my little cousins knows what impotence is...but he's (age 11) the one that came up with that answer for the clue "things that are soft" beginning with the letter "i."

Alright...i've got to jet.

Till next time.

James
]]> Wed, 04 Jan 2006 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208432 0 38.58167 -121.49333 * "That's what she said".
* There are Harley Davidson stores in so many cities. I didn't even know that they really existed. I knew that they were in shops, but I thought that stores had all sorts of bikes. I didn't realize that there was an outlet store just for Harley's. WOW.
* "I want a gay tracter".
* James spent the whole trip on E. It was vitiman E, but fun to say, nonetheless.
* "True Story"
* "You said bottom". "You said top".
* At the club in Chicago, I slapped James in the face pretty hard. You see, I spent a good 15 minutes dancing next to this guy that I thought was cute and then James walks by and in 2 seconds pulls the guy in and starts dancing with him pretty closely. James came over to me and started dancing and I slapped him. He did it multiple times that evening, so I slapped him for each. It was almost like that Friends episode where Monica and Rachel flick each others forehead and Pheobe has to separate them.
* Creating Music Videos to the songs from RENT. Along the way, we video recorded ourselves singing to RENT. They are pretty funny too!

There were much, much more... but I can only think of these thus far.

Rob
]]> Sat, 31 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208431 0 39.29028 -76.6125 So, I left Chicago...without James. It wasn't that I left James in Chicago, since he did take a plane to Sacramento the day before. But I couldn't get it out of my head that I was leaving him there. The passenger seat was empty. I had no one to talk to. What a trip this has been. I can't even imagine explaining, but I'm going to try. What other trip do you experience:
* traffic that delays your trip about 3 hours (to Sacramento)
* a death in the family
* a heavy snowstorm that delays your trip about 5 hours (to Salt Lake City)
* sleeping in the car because your friend won't wake up.
* seeing your friend's family (James C's family, James L's family, Brian B's family)
* visit the memorial of a stranger that was murdered because you feel a common link (Matthew Shephard)
* sleep in front of a fireplace in the Rocky Mountain National Park (actually Estes Park), but one in the same to me.
* wake up to elk in the front yard.
* stop at T&A's across America to tell our stories
* find a new city (Chicago) where we wouldn't mind moving to and celebrating New Years in it a few days early

There is so much that happens in James and my lives. This trip is a turning point, but a symbolic event that tells me that nothing will change. At least I don't think so. At the beginning of the trip, we hit some things that may have prevented us to go further. In fact, with all of the signs, perhaps we should have turned around. But we didn't. We smiled, acknowledged what was behind us and moved on. That's how James and I react to each other. Every time we are in a fight, one of us kiss the other's ass so that we don't have to go to breakfast alone the next day.

James, believe me when I say - no matter what events that I have in Connecticut or other, they will not compare to the fun that I have with my best friend!
]]> Sat, 31 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208430 0 41.85 -87.65
The night out in Chicago was my New Year's Celebration. Since I won't be having one this year (my grandfather's funeral is on the 31st), I asked Rob, Brian, and Janine if they could celebrate with me. While strange to yell "Happy New Year" on the 29th...I'm really glad that I was able to ring in the new year with them.

The next day, Brian took us all over Chicago. The city is beautiful. Full of culture, diversity, life! Walking through the city reminded me of the first time I walked through San Diego. I knew I loved San Diego the moment I entered the city. I had that same feeling walking through Chicago. I'm definitly coming back...maybe moving there? who knows?

This trip has changed me. From my family getting to know Rob and James, to spending another Christmas with a death in the family (my dad's father passed away last Christmas and I spent Christmas in the Phillippines and New Years on a plane), to reignighting old friendships, to expierencing a whole new city with excitement and awe, to saying "I'll see you later" to a really good friend...this trip has given me new options. While I'm scared of what will happen next...i'm totally open to whatever possibilities 2006 has to offer. 2005 was a great year...here's to an even better one!

While my trip across the US is done (I'll be in Sacramento till January 3rd), Rob's is still going on. I plan on continuing to write until I actually get home,to San Diego...so stay tuned. What I write may be a little depressing...but I'll get through it.

I had to say good-bye to Rob yestarday. Once we got to the airport, I left quickly because I didn't want him to see me cry. Crying for two reasons...the whole trip, I didn't think about what was going on in Sacramento. Actually getting to the airport reminded me of what was ahead. Second...I'm going to miss Rob. So much of my life in San Diego was spent with him. I'm scared to be alone...and once I get back to San Diego, I will be. While I know that Rob will be back...and life will still be the same...there's a part of me that has to be put away while he's gone. Rob...thank you for being the trip and the experiences of this trip. So many memories...and I know that there are definitely many more to come. While I don't want to say "come back soon" because I know that you won't be back until your grandmother passes, I will say "you owe me a double headed semi!"

Alright..I'm off to go get some clothes for the funeral.

See you soon....

James
]]> Fri, 30 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208427 0 41.85 -87.65
When the two arrived at the hotel, Brian looked more dashing than ever. Janine was perfect as she has always been - pretty and petite. I wasn't sure what the night had planned for us, but I knew that it started with a Chicago deep dish pizza. I thought that it would be like any normal pizza. I've been to Bronx Pizza off of Washington Blvd. It's ok. I've had better. I think that I prefer the Americanized Papa Johns and everything else is just blah. But not Chicago pizza. This pizza had layers to it. So good and we were full off of 2 pieces. I was surprised when I took the second. One large pizza covered the four of us. Good times.

We then waltzed our way into Boystown. Boystown is just like Hillcrest is to San Diego or Castro is to San Francisco. I would never believe that they would call it "Boystown", but whatever, it was fun nonetheless. There were boys everywhere. Holding hands, eating a romantic dinner, and reading at a coffee shop together. I am not sure how I knew that they were together at a coffee shop, but I just knew. It was like Chicago was a city of love or something. So damn cute, I almost vomitted.

We stopped at a little bar/dance club, who's name I don't recall. Brian immediately bought a pitcher of Margarita. James had a Bacardi/coke. It was a great night, there was a lounge area, and a back area which had a singing contest. The contest was for the next rising star. There were three contestants. The girl, I thought, was the best voice, but she couldn't remember any of the words from the song. It was a Les Miserables song, and James and I assisted her as much as we could remember. Definitely a good time. The crowd emptied and then came dancing.

We stayed at the bar until it closed at 1:30/2am. We proceeded to the next one: Charley's. Janine and Brian went back to the hotel. I thought that we would too, but James decided to stay out - so I did too. It was more fun than the other bar. I'll let James get into the story on that front. But let's just say, we are probably having lunch with a boy or two tomorrow. Nothing more than lunch though. We were very good boys and returned to the hotel. The one thing that I can't believe is that the second bar still serves liquor until like 5am! Holy Cow. I just stuck to water.

The walk home was brilliant. Although it was 37 degrees, the sweat on our backs and our body heat kept us warm. The cold air felt like air conditioning on a hot day. It was a nice walk back. And a nice talk between James and I. We'll be back, Chicago.
]]> Thu, 29 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208425 0 41.85 -87.65 Laramie.

Nebraska isn’t interesting. It’s very flat with nothing in any direction. But in it’s own strange way, the simplicity of the region makes it very beautiful. The people here (the people in the rest stops, gas stations, McDonalds, and hotel) are very very nice. I’m totally impressed with Nebraska. Funny thing is that I’d like to come back. Maybe spend more time in Lincoln and actually see this city.

We’ve been listening to “The Devil Wears Prada.” This is a really good book. It is so much easier to follow then “Wicked.” Wicked has a lot of “the witches sister, who lived next to the fireman’s daughter, went down the….” But Prada…now this is a great book. We’re about four-fifth’s done…and I’m routing for Amanda to get with Christian. Yes, I know that she has a long term boyfriend, Alex, but Christian is so much better for her (or maybe I would like to date Christian.)

Anyway…we’re off to Chicago. I’m excited to go out in Boystown!

James
]]> Wed, 28 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208424 0 40.8 -96.66667 Last night, James and I curled up on the bed and watched a movie on my laptop. I dug the speakers out of the car so that I could have surround sound. The laptop isn't very loud for DVD's. Like usual, he fell asleep and we didn't make it through the movie. It is a really cute move. If you get a chance to watch "Millions", you should.

So, we just had breakfast and now we are on our way to Chicago. This is the end of the roadtrip for James and will be the beginning for my sadness. I can never replace James. There are some good things about the trip though. My friend, Beth, is expecting a baby any day now. My friends, Stewart and Kate, are having birthdays shortly. I will be partaking in a few festivities. James - if you want to fly back out, you can enjoy the times with me. =)

Okay... Time to go. Have fun!

Rob
]]> Wed, 28 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208423 0 40.8 -96.66667
Taking the 80 through Wyoming takes us directly through Laramie. Now, it has always been in the plans that we would stop in Laramie to pay our respects to Matthew Shepherd, but earlier this evening and driving through it, gave me another perspective.

We happened to be going by Laramie at about 6 PM. It’s dark and all the lights are out. All along our trip, it’s been cloudy. Suddenly, the night’s sky is clear and up above were a multitude of stars. From what I remember of Matt’s story is that as he was tied up to the fence, he had clear views of both the city lights and the stars. As we drove through Laramie that is exactly the view that I was treated to (Rob was asleep.) I couldn’t stop thinking of what Matthew had went through. Being tied naked to the fence. Cold. And the glittering of both lights from a city and up above.

In a pervious blog, I wrote about how I stand out. How I feel very different. How I feel out of place. Going through Laramie tonight reminded me that I am different. Being reminded of what happened to Matthew, reminded me that I (we) had to be careful.

When we stopped for dinner at McDonald’s, both Rob and I were getting stared at. We were also staring at everyone else. I don’t know which one of us was the outsiders. Everyone in the city looks completely different from what you would find in California…and I’m sure that we looked extremely out of place to all of them.

As we ate at McDonald’s, both Rob and I whispered to each other the entire dinner. Normally, I wouldn’t care a rat’s ass who was listening to our conversation. But tonight at dinner, I was very aware of what I was saying. I was very aware of not being overtly “gay,” of not staring at the cute boy walking into the restaurant, of not making sexual jokes out loud. It took every effort to be “straight.”

This is just the juxtaposition of what we were doing three hours earlier. Three hours earlier we were singing at the tops of lungs the songs from Rent. (We have a few of them on camera, so hopefully you’ll see what I mean.) How is it that we can be comfortable doing this, and then hours later, be cognizant that we couldn’t “act” this way because there is that possibility that we’ll get ourselves into a bit of trouble.

James
]]> Tue, 27 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208421 0 41.31139 -105.59056
The elk stand there, looking around, chomping the grass, looking up and around, and watching for people who may be approaching. James wants to grab the camera, but the elk are quickly approaching the car. If he opens the door, he may scare them away. But no one else is up either, so we are afraid we will be making too much noise as well. The elk are beautiful. They have this rum, though that is a different color. It’s almost like it is bare. And if it is, I feel sorry since the snow is flurrying right now and it’s bound to get cold. The wind alone would cause frostbite – or so I think.

Jessica and her family are all so nice to have allowed us to stay with them. It is only a short period of time, more like a night’s rest. We won’t be actually spending too much time with them besides breakfast or a snack before we hit the road. She looks so cute and motherly with her newly defined pregnant stomach. It wasn’t there last time I saw her.

I can’t wait to go back through the back roads to get to the highway. They were winding and close to rock. The rock, huge in form, lay on both sides of the road for a tight fit and a brilliant scenic view, I’m sure. It definitely takes a complete level of attention. One animal in the road and I’m sure – I’d be off into the river. We’ll take pictures, so don’t you worry.

We definitely wouldn’t have time for a music video. James and I have been recording ourselves with the camera singing songs from RENT. James broke out in his feminine act, singing “Today 4 U”. My oh my, what a sight. He and I both sang “La Vie Boheme” and “Living in America”. The second, we may show to people. Who knows?! My craze for the hit musical has died recently. Not sure if it’s my present predicament or if the movie was a final Hurrah for me. Watching the movie, I did feel as if I were dwelling on it. Obviously, when I saw the play for the first time, it was under a different set of circumstances. In the beginning, it was a trend, something to unite people together on a common bond. It was an immediate bond. When you were in the RENTline, you were family. People talked about where they were from, how many times they saw the play, who in the cast they have met. Then, we would talk about who we were, perhaps play a game or ten and even sing songs. Not always from the musical, but eventually the soundtrack would be put in and we would start singing from our favorite songs. Sometimes, we didn’t even need the background music. We would just go acapella. Now, I think that I am growing a little older and the crowd seems a little younger. I felt comfortable last time, but then again, I brought my friends with me. I think that it’s time to let others partake in the RENTline and I’ll stand aside.

“Last night, I had a dream”. I wasn’t in cyberland (as depicted from Maureen in RENT), but moreso in Balboa Park. I was with Dakota, Patrik and Josh. I was supposed to work that day for a little while. So, off I went, leaving the boys to baby-sit Dakota. At the end of the day, the fire alarms sounded. Anyone that knows Balboa Park knows that there are not fire alarms – but it’s a dream, so it’s allowed. I looked into the Park and a huge flame rose from the center. I had to get Dakota. Running through the crowd, I couldn’t find him anywhere. I kept searching, with thoughts through my mind of Dakota lost sitting next to a tree and a stranger collecting him to “take him to safety”, but really meaning to take him away. I had to find him, as tears started down my face. The phone rings. It’s Patrik. Dakota’s with Patrik! Thank goodness. I find their location and I run to them, picking Dakota up, hugging him dramatically, and then I woke. I think that my internal clock is ticking. I mentioned to James that it was time to finally settle down. Perhaps this trip is my first attempt at doing that.

Well, off to shower, maybe even shave! My beard is starting to grow.

Enjoy…
Rob
]]> Tue, 27 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208420 0 40.015 -105.27
Boy do I look different. I always wonder what people think of me as we travel the country. No better place to figure that out is to go to the middle of nowhere, where everyone looks the same and you look different. Not only do I look different, but I’ve got a scar on my face. Now, in every other place, I think the scar looks hot, but here, I think it makes me stand out even more. We’re in Wyoming, btw.

As I went to the bathroom, I had to walk clear across the restaurant, through the general store, past the washers and dryers, and into the back of the building. Each person I passed, stopped what they were doing and looked at me as I was some sort of anomaly. Not that there is anything wrong with this, it’s just that I know I’m so out of place.

Now, we’re stuck in five mile an hour traffic with chains on the wheels. If we make to Salt Lake City tonight, that would be a tremendous feat.

R: Boo!
J: Boo you!
R: You snow.
J: Snow blow.
R: Blow horn.
J: Horny cock.
R: Cock block.
J: Block. Let’s stop this. This is quite stupid.

The snow falling on cedars. This is my first white Christmas. It’s quite magical. I would love to be home and just watch the snow fall. In a car, while it’s all around you, isn’t quite as relaxing.

It’s definitely been quite an adventure.

James
]]> Sun, 25 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208417 0 39.32806 -120.18222 It was fun to see Rob interact with my family. They were all teasing him to eat some fish. Now, I love fish, but this fish doesn’t look very good. If you ever had guppies as a pet…and sautéed them…and served them on a platter…you know what kind of fish they were trying to get Rob to eat. They were all talking about how he was white, cute, and gay. How he picked up a bowl and not a plate. My family was loving it. Sadly…because Rob didn’t eat the fish, he didn’t pass.

There are also these rumors flying around out there about my face. Most people believe that I got into a bar fight. Truthfully…I’d rather them think this than think anything at all. There’s also the rumor that I fell out of a coconut tree…caught syphilis….or that my boyfriend is beating me.

We also had breakfast with mama ling, mama ling boyfriend, and james. It’s becoming a tradition to have breakfast with mama ling before leaving town. It’s always at IHOP too. Mama ling is so cute. She’s like the woman version of James. Cute, spunky, and has a wild sense of humor.

Ok…I should get back to the book on tape. We’re listening to “Wicked.” I’m going to take a nap.

James
]]> Sun, 25 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208416 0 38.58167 -121.49333
Christmas Eve…begins at Christmas Eve. I was expecting to wake up…spend the morning lounging around and then get ready to go to my grandparents house at about 5 in the evening. So we got up…my sister is baking cookies (her normal addition to the festivities of the holidays)…and we begin watching “Crash.” Things are going smoothly…then the phone begins to ring…and ring…and ring. I hear in the background my sister talking about…”Oh Grandpa is fine. I saw him last night. There’s nothing to worry about.” Next phone call: “He’s just coughing up blood. Not too bad. He’s doing well.” Final phone call: “We’re on our way.”

I look up…and she tells me that we should head over to our grandparents house. Everyone over there thinks my grandfather is going to pass. My sister is still not worried. So I go take a leisurely shower and get ready to take off.

We get to my grandparents house and what a sight. He’s in a coma. He’s shaking and isn’t comprehending anything. They tell us to say our goodbyes. I new right then and there that it was coming close.

We all gathered in grandfather’s room and began praying. Throughout the prayers, I can’t stop crying. My grandparents were always there. Every day after school we would head to my grandparents house and wait for our parents to pick us all up. My grandfather would be the one to pick us up. There were about 8 to 10 little kids all piled up in my grandfather’s t-bird. But that’s what it was. It was our grandparents way of helping out.

My grandfather was always very strict. There are plenty of stories of how he would raise his voice at us and be constantly mad at us. Now, I realize why that was. A house full of 8 to 10 little kids…is tough to handle. But it was always there pleasure to do it.

So many thoughts going through my head today. I realized that this was the first time that I’ve watched someone die. It’s always been I would get the call that so and so has died. Watching my grandfather today…I don’t know if I could do it again. I don’t know if I can watch someone die. It’s hard. It’s been the hardest thing that I have had to do. Strange thing is that I’m glad that I got the opportunity to be there. My grandfather, as he passed, was surrounded by his family. Surrounded by the ones who loved him…and the ones that he loved. If I had my choice of how I wanted to go…that’s the way I would want to do it.

After my grandfather passed…it became a celebration. Death in my family isn’t about mourning their passing…but a celebration of life. There is a time where we do say our good-byes. Where we mourn their loss. But usually right after that…it’s time to celebrate their life. We gather outside and began telling stories of our grandfather. Each time someone took a shot…they had to tell a story of our grandfather. Sometimes it was sad…most times it made us laugh. Family is an amazing thing.

Today was also special in another way. I’m very thankful that both Rob and James were in town. It’s sort of my grandfather’s way of telling our family and showing our family that it’s ok that I’m gay. When Rob and James came up to Sacramento in July, my grandfather was in the hospital. At that point, he was given six months to live. Rob came in with me to the hospital room and I introduced me to my grandfather. After Rob left the room, my grandfather asked if Rob was my roommate. I said no…Rob was just my friend. He then asked me, “Is Rob your friend?” I knew at that point that my grandfather was trying to ask me if Rob was my boy friend. I answered, “No, he’s just my friend.” My grandfather either didn’t hear me or didn’t believe me that Rob was just a friend. Either case, it didn’t matter. He then told me that Rob and I should buy a house together. That in his honor, we should plant tomatoes and cili in the back yard. When these were ripe, that we should have him over and make him dinner.

This was my grandfather’s way of telling me that he is happy for me. That he’s accepting of me. That he’s giving me his blessing. For my grandfather to tell me that Rob and I should buy a house together…he’s basically telling me that we should get married. That it’s ok if I would be marrying a guy. That’s the ultimate blessing from my grandfather.

The reason for the tomatoes and the cili is that these were my favorite things to eat that my grandfather would make. My grandfather grew both tomatoes and cili in his backyard. As a child, he would prepare the tomatoes with bogoung or patis. So very very good. He would also always have a jar of pickled cili. When I left for college, he would always ask when I was coming back to visit. Whenever I would visit, he would make sure that I went home with tomatoes and a jar of pickled cili. It was my gift from my grandfather.

As I said goodbye to my grandfather today…I told him thank you for his blessing. Thank you for helping take care of us. Thank you for all your sacrifices. My grandfather was an amazing man. He fought in WWII. Was shot in WWII. Brought his family over from the Philippines and started over here with nothing. With nothing…he managed to gain everything.

Ok we’re off…and the guy at the drive through…not hot and not worth the 20 minutes to get our food.

Ta ta!

Cilantro Margarita (James)
]]> Sat, 24 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208413 0 37.30222 -120.48194 Miles to Sacramento…can you feel the excitement?

The car is cramped. So much stuff…I guess that’s what you get when you have two people on vacation and one moving across the country….oh well…onto better subjects.

God that guy at dinner tonight was BEAUTIFUL! He was about 5’ 11” 150 lbs…scruffy….sort of light brown hair….His haircut was awesome too. He had the mow hawk, but not a drastic mow hawk. I’m totally going to do that to my hair once I return to San Diego.

Oh and there was this 16 year old there….hehe J

Till later.

Mrs. Darcy (James)
]]> Fri, 23 Dec 2005 00:00:00 GMT http://www.blogabond.com/TripView.aspx?tripID=35867 http://www.blogabond.com/CommentView.aspx?commentID=208412 0 35.37333 -119.01778
One thing that I don’t bring up very much is my childhood. I spent a lot of time with my grandparents. They offered me a second home when times were not so great in my own household. Grandpa would always have a Klondike bar waiting for me. We would watch WWF, even though I hated it. I don’t know why – grown men in tight clothing? I would think that it would be right up my alley at the time. But no, I just thought it was silly. Grandma would always be there to play games with. We used to play gin rummy, Uno, dice, Trouble and Sorry. These were all games that I was 100% out to win. In Trouble, for instance, I would stop at nothing to make her pawn piece be sent home. For me, it wasn’t about winning the game, it was just to see the reaction on her face and hear her call me “You little shit!” or some other naughty word that generally doesn’t come out of her mouth. That’s what made it so funny. I did my best to make her use swear words.

My trip began with saying “see you later” to a number of people. Len was not easy for me because he is dealing with a lot of the same stuff that my grandmother is – just on a different level. He constantly deals with good days and bad days. There is a part of me that feels like I am abandoning him by going. Joe, comes next. This was tough for me. I have grown attached to the boy. I would never say that we were the perfect fit. I think that’s what I like about it. There’s something there that makes me want to look into his life and see what makes him who he is and do what he does. I’m not his general type either. Sometimes the ideal of the ‘perfect’ match evolve. My thoughts are quite different than they were last year. My coworkers were next. They were a little easier. I have spent a bit of time with them lately, and although I will miss them, I will have the same conversations with them as I have in the past – just over email / phone. Vineeta was different. We had a little bit of a rocky start. Now, I know that it was hard to say good-bye, so I just left quickly. She would seriously make me cry pretty easy. I haven’t had to say anything to James yet. We have one huge, emotional trip ahead. There’s so so much to say on this subject, but I’m going to hold out for now. I’m sure there is much more to come later.

I crossed the San Diego county line today. That was the last sign that this is all happening. San Diego doesn’t feel like my home anymore. My bed/furniture is just where I left it, but I am not spending my time there. I’ll be coming back to ‘visit’ until the final days. Things are going to be different. I’m not sure how. I’m not sure when. But this trip is all ready changing me. I’m sure it will all be for the good.

Rob
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