El Neato!!!

We had an awesome vegetarian extravaganza last night and Nuttter is still in heaven.  The staff were so suprized to see us they took pictures and made us fill in a guest book. Too funny.

Speaking of food, I decided to splash out yesterday in Dumaguete and get a filet mignon. 

NOTE:
Never ever ever order a steak in a country with no cows.  

Not only was my filet mignon simply an eighth of an inch slab of frozen london broil, but it tasted not completely dissimilar to cardboard AND it was the equivelent of three of any of our total dinner bills so far.

So, degected, I left Nuttter in the hotel in search of a whisky. Yeah, good luck with that!!! Honestly, you would have thought that the Speyside region of the Scottish highlands had never been invented.  

I eventually found some Chivas Regal in a dodgy bar, so, sitting next to some 300 pound Swiss giant of a man, downed it and then went to (I know) McDonalds for 2 burgers! To nullify my crying stomach that was still coming to terms with the "thought" of filet mignon and the "reality" that it was forced to digest- or "let ferment" might be a closer analogy.

AAAAARGH I AM SO SICK OF ALL THESE COCKS!!!!

Every single place we go to seems to have a cockeral tethered to it somewhere, mostly underneath where we are sitting and I tell you now that I would not hesitate to cut the head off of every single one of them given a machette and two minutes.  

Let me explain why in one numeral and two letters. 4AM. from 4am until noon these friggin creatures cock-a-doodle-dooing is enough for the most patient man - or in lieu of him, me - to lose his marbles.

Right now for instance I can hear at least 7 of them and one is four feet away from me.  My death stares only seem to make him louder. 

So our eleven oclock departure time comes. And then goes. Not until 11:40 do we finally all cram into a Nissan Urvan built for fourteen people, revurbished for many more "Asian statured" peeps and housing - today for this eledged five hour trip - seventeen. This includes Nuttter, Groovespook and Adriane, a six foot Romanian stuck in the back!

The first five hours of our five hour bus trip were pretty sweet really. The driver tore through north Palawan as if the Philipino Police were chasing us whilst firing their M16's.

Then, during our last stop, the driver - a wisoned old man with a disconcerting perma-smile - let out air from all the tires. Hmmm I thought. Curious. Until we hit the dirt road. Then I realised why he let the air out. Never in all my born days have I been so glued to the "road" ahead. This guy - and he would make a brilliant rally car driver - continued the  "being chased by cops with guns" theme on roads NOT SUITABLE BY A LONG STRETCH!!!!!!

Needless to say I left finger nails in the seat in front of me.  What sucked about this the most was the view we all just ccould not look at.  We have all seen pictures of massive islands of rock surrounded by turqouise seas but has anyone been forced to ignore said views for fear of flying off the road? 

Anyone on the private van from Puerto Princessa to El Nido has I will bet.

We got to El Nido and wandred around searching for accomodation. Finally found a sweet cabin 10 minutes out of town, got settled and trundled into the first beachside restaurant we could find and ordered a whole grilled Red Snapper. GORGEOUS!!

I then made the mistake of attempting to get a martini. Ugh. First try they gave me a glass of vermouth. Second try was half a glass of vermouth with a splash of vodka, which is where I left it.

Amd so to Tuesday. Feeling refreshed and vibrant from walking out the door and seeing a view that puts most postcards to shame, we took a tour on a small outrigger to a number of the small islands around the locale of El Nido for some snorkeling.

To describe what we saw today, picture the most amazing aquarium you have ever seen, make it the size of Manhattan and dive in. Every tropical fish you have seen in schools of ten to over a hundred, oblivious to us ungainly white snorkelers peering into their pristine world.

Those awesome little Neons that everyone thinks are so cute? Pests compared to the schools of Angel fish beneath them and the Parot fish below them. 

We swam through thousands of neons, darting to avoid our flippers and all catching the sunlight at once as the swam around at lightning speed. Awesome.

Molusks and bright blue star-fish and space-like, spikey things creeping around along the sea floor amongst luminous yellow, blue and white corals.  Visability of at least thirty feet.  We spent the whole day in awe of the coral and the giant, magestic, molten rock mountains covered in forest. Protecting all this natural wonderment from the ravishes of the open sea. 

Coming up for a break from snorkeling, it's like looking at Tolkien's Mordor, 500 years after Frodo and after the sea has risen eighty feet and some serious climate change.

We just got back to the room, it's raining and the freshness is so nice. We are both a little burnt but still totally blissed out. Who knows, we may have to devour another hour old whole fish for dinner!

The tour today was so we may be doing something very similar tomorrow.

written by  Groovespook on July 27, 2010 from El Nido, Philippines
from the travel blog: Nuttter and Groovespook go Philippine island hopping
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