North Island Day 4: The Bet

The trouble with free campsites is that sometimes they attract people who want to stay up all night and make noise which is fine unless me and my mates aren't the ones making the noise. Last night it was a group of Kiwi kids who, at one point at about 1am, drove a car through the busy site honking the horn. Their arguments which were conducted between 1am and 2am are as follows:

One of the lads is going to be "fucking killed" by the others and they made their way through the site looking for him. Loudly.

Girl number one seems to be after Girl number two's fella. Girl number two gives her blessing at the top of her voice with the words, "If you want sloppy seconds you can fuckin' 'av 'im!"

Girl number two is apparently having Sloppy Second's baby.

They made up and began singing to each other. No. Really. Actually singing.

It beats watching Eastenders anyway.

Anyway, first stop today was Karangahake Gorge for a bit of a walk before breakfast. It's a really nice walk, pretty short an all so you can do it before breakfast and not starve to death. There's a part of it called the Underground Pumphouse and they recommend you take a torch. The only torches I have are the ones I picked up from the $2 shop that are about as bright as Paris Hilton but we took them anyway and ventured into the cave.

Now Imagine Two Screaming Poms...

Clearly we both watch too much horror. We didn't even get halfway in, Andrea hanging a bit behind before that kind of fear you haven't felt since you were five years old and thought the gremlins were behind you overcame us and we legged it out of the cave like the soft bitches we are.

God I hope no one saw us.

Next stop was the less sinister Paeroa, home of the "world famous in New Zealand" Lemon & Paeroa soft drink. We bought a bottle and pulled the obligatory tourist poses in front of the big bottle.
L&P is a very very NZ thing and it's really popular. We don't have it at my bar in Auckland and when we inform customers of this we're met with a look of stunned horror and you have to leave them for 5 minutes while they recover and rethink their lives and their mixers. I haven't really tried it before, I'm a coca cola whore but we left Paeroa with me swigging the stuff from the bottle. I felt so Kiwi. I'll be referring to flip flops as jandals next and chasing after sheep on a Saturday night.

Luxury, Mate!

Tonight we'd be in Waitomo on account of the fact we'd booked ourselves in for some black water rafting action the next day, we were staying at a Top 10 campsite which had all kinds of exciting things such as a hot tub and a pool and no mozzies. There must be some kind of relation between the price of a campsite and how likely you are to get eaten alive by things you can't see until it's too late. Anyway. We got drunk and this is where The Bet was born, designed to get Andrea to do a bungee jump.

THE BET
If Andi does a bungee jump in Taupo I have to get a full minge wax. As in total. As in, not just the little bits round the edge to stop your dreddlocks sticking out of the sides of your bikini bottoms, every single hair on my private parts brutally torn from their roots. However, if Andi bottles out of aforementioned bungee jump she has to be my bitch for the duration of the trip.

Is It Legal To Sign Contracts....

...When You're THIS Wasted??

Shortly after the bet was made I text everyone I thought might have had a wax to gauge the pain on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being fine, 10 being Kill Me Now. So apparently it's about an eight or nine.

I'm so doomed.

written by

Koala Bear on January 16, 2009 from Waitomo Caves, New Zealand

from the travel blog: Tiny Little NZ Road Trip

tagged RoadTrip, LovinIt and NorthIsland

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pffft you must know a whole bunchload of wussbags, waxing is nothing, I give it a 4 maybe 5 but maybe that's because I've been doing it since I was 14. Now laser ie IPL which is my new thing for zapping the crap outta that hair... now that'll make you jump... :)

written by OneTormented on January 28, 2009

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