Trains, Planes and a sleeping Swede

Well I think it might be best to cut a long story short!
Yesterday at half eleven I got into a car, then I got onto a train, after 3 hours I got onto the tube, then I got onto another train. Then I arrived at Heathrow airport. By this point I already felt as though I had travelled long enough to at least be in another country. After 4 hours of hanging around I got onto a plane to Paris only to be told seconds after boarding that the flight would be delayed by 20 minutes. That's not so bad. We were told that the delay was due to the amount of air traffic but whilst we waited the horrific grinding noise the plane was making made me think otherwise. After an hour and twenty minutes of god awful 'on hold' music and fear of being strapped into the plane of doom we finally took off. Only a short 2 hour flight to Paris where I would be changing over to Johannesburg. As each minute passed I know my chances of arriving in Paris in time to catch my flight were getting slimmer and slimmer. We landed in Paris 20 minutes before my next plane took off, by the time I managed to get off I only had 10 minutes to spare. As I stepped of the plane a member of the 'Air France' crew ushered me down a set of stairs onto the runway bit (where the planes park?) and bundled me into the back of a van. I figured she was tring to get me to my plane on time, but she could have been kidnapping me, I couldn't understand a word she was saying. She drove like a maniac, dodging other vans, busses and luggage carts before arriving at the departure gate for my flight to Jburg. I was very grateful for her efforts, but when I arrived the flight had been delayed so it was all a bit unnecessary. I had another 45 minute wait before the flight finally boarded. It was the Airbus A380, which I later found out is the largest plane in the world. I've never been on a double decker plane before! The novelty soon wore off. I was sat next to a youngish Swedish girl, who was really sweet, but she fell asleep straight after taking off and slept for almost the entire 10 hour flight. I had the window seat and couldn't get out! The plane wasn't crowded and I wanted to move so I could get comfy and have a kip, but I couldn't. For a while it was because I didn't have the heart to waker her, but 6 hours in I did try gently rouse her from what looked like an amazingly deep and wonderful sleep (I wasn't watching her sleep, that's creepy, it's an assumption I made after one or two sideways glances in her direction!) but to no avail. She was out for the count.
Again due to delays when I finally arrived in Jburg I had about 30 minutes to get my onward flight to Cape Town. This time though, as I was changing airlines, I had to go through customs, get my visa, collect my luggage and check in all over again.
I really had no idea I could run so fast.
Bearing in mind my combined luggage weighs approx 4 stone and at this point I was 30 hours without sleep or a shower and 24 hours without a fag I'm surprised no one died.
I got on my flight to cape town. I had no one sitting next to me, we took off on time and I wasn't forced to listen to some random nobody singing Celine Dion 'My Heart Will Go On'.
Upon arrival I got the shuttle bus to the hostel, had a shower and a fistful of cigarettes. Feeling refreshed and looking forward to some shut eye, but with only the offer of Macaroni Cheese for tea if I stay here I think I'll venture out for a wander before it get's dark.

Trains, Planes and a sleeping Swede

Cape Town, South Africa