LAX - Blogabond

Los Angeles, United States

Ok. Planes, however large they look when you're standing next to them are actually pretty small. So when there is a group of less than *how to phrase this without sounding offensive*... intelligent, loud mouthed over bearing individuals who insist on shouting at each other from 6 inches apart for the duration of a polite conversation it's kinda hard to escape. Someone needs to invent a life jacket that you can remove from it's cover under your chair, inflate by pulling the red tab or using the mouth piece and all of a sudden you won't hear these annoying people. But really the flight, despite that it was 14ish hours, was fine. But... and there's always a but, here is the kicker, border control there is HARSH, if you EVER travel to the states, please follow:

Step 1)
ENSURE that you RUN as fast as you can to the front of the line, push people out of the way if necessary, particularly if they are infirmed or elderly, these people will only hold you back. Remember, in America only the strong survive anyways so you don't need to feel too bad for too long.

The reason for Step 1 is because the immigration "officers" are SO slow, the amount of crap they have to do is huge, so it follows that it takes a LONG time.

Step 2)
Despite being at the front of the line it'll still take FOREVER because unless you're a US citizen there will probably only be a couple of booths open. If this is the case fill in your GREEN and WHITE forms. Double Check them. QUADRUPLE TUPLE CHECK THEM. Do not get anything wrong, they will send you to the back of the line, they aren't joking!

Quick story:>

Now it might just be me that answers questions that are asked literally, but when the question reads: "Where will you spend your time in the US?" and the answer to that question is "At LAX because I'm in transit to Canada" it follows that you would write "LAX" in the answer box. NO NO NO NO NO. ARE YOU SO STUPID (or should I say STOOPID?) THAT YOU THINK THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE GOING the man asked me... I simply said "Oh, sorry, I'm jet lagged". Of course in my brain I'm thinking, well, I answered the STOOPID question, so aren't you the jerk bag? But I didn't want to be sent home, so I complied.

Step 3)
Don't bother looking for a sign. That tells you anything. There aren't any.

Step 4)
If you're not planning on staying there to see all the wonderful stuff that I'm sure is there behind a curtain of rude, arrogant and generally unhelpful airport people (I'm sure past the iron curtain of the airport there is plenty of nice things and people... well, it looked like that in Borat) then enjoy your stay :)

Oh and don't leave your laptop in it's case when you're going through the gates, they'll draw their guns and I don't mean draw them with Crayola crayons on scrap paper.

I never thought I'd star in a teen movie, or even be an Extra, but it seems that LAX is EXACTLY like the movies, and the general population of the airport was EXACTLY like the movies. "Pledgers" on their way to Spring break, "Soccer Moms", "Jocks", "Nerds", amazing! It was kinda cool in a really odd sorta way. Of course there were plenty of foreigners too, but in general it was everything that I thought was TV, and nothing that felt real.

Anyways... OFF TO CANADA!!! WOOHOO

written by

haveyouseenmypassport on March 10, 2007 from Los Angeles, United States

from the travel blog: To infinity!.. and... beyond... uh.....

tagged Us, LAX, Border and Control

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1 comment...

Los Angeles, United States

Hi all!

Thismorning I wrote a blog, however, when hitting the save button it said error on page and i lost everything!

Therefore the short version:

Departured from S'sisco thru Santa cruz to Morro Bay (7hours drive)
Slept in an motel called the Holland inn...

Following morning drove to Malibu..
Went to the beach.. got a motel... whent to a club called "MoonlightShadows"
It's a Star hangout.. I was not on the list bullshit my self in..

Nice lady's.. drinks,, lady's,, food,,, lady's..view..lady's and did i mention the lady's?
(What happens in Malibu stay's in Malibu)

Thismorning drove to Long Beach.. and now I'm at the airport awaiting my flight to Fiji.

I will not have a monday 18th August because of the time differance.

Dont know where i will sleep... but i'll find out when i gett there..
I do know I want to go to BeachComber Island (That's my boat's make)
Pic's will follow..

Keep posting comments!

I'm getting a drink now! (or two)

Ciao Kris

written by

Kristian Kossen on August 17, 2008 from Los Angeles, United States

from the travel blog: Trip around the world

tagged LAX

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Miami, United States

Before we even got to Miami we had a connecting flight to catch in LAX, little did we know that there would be fake Airport personal , giving out directions if you looked lost ,which we did. One promptly came up to us and asked "you look lost where are you trying to go?"
After we got our instruction he put out his hand and said that will be $5 please ??????????

http://apple-ipod.ruqqa.com

written by

joefriday on September 26, 2008 from Miami, United States

from the travel blog: My First big Trip to the US

tagged LAX and Miami

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Los Angeles, United States

Ok so today is the big travel day. I flew up to Los Angeles previously and had a layover for a night. My wonderful friend Chelsea picked me up and I was able to have a night in LA with her. So today is the big day where I head to Asia for almost four months.
Some of the reality of this trip still seems to take time to slowly sink in. It's been something I've been working on doing for almost two years, and now it's finally here.
When I flew out of San Diego yesterday, as the plane took off, it hit like a ton of bricks that I'm really gone. I no longer belong to San Diego. I no longer belong to anywhere. It's a strange and exciting, liberating place to be.
While sitting here in LAX it's all of a sudden vividly real that I'm leaving for an extended period of time. It's exciting and scary all at once. I'm so grateful that I've developed the gift of really liking myself finally and and enjoying my own company. The last couple years were life changing and I did a lot of work to really get to know who I am and become someone I love, and am so happy for that. I know that this trip will hold amazing adventures, and having the ability to like being on my own will make it not scary as it otherwise would be.
I'm filled with gratitude for everything in my life and all the people I've encountered so far. So, so long California. You've been great. I'll be writing and letting you all know what's happening once I land.

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