waking with hangovers we went on a bit of an explore around bondi and generally spent time really confused about time, why it's warm and november and why australian men seem to have taken a liking to wearing speedos....

beached it pretty much everyday spent time walking barefoot around and ever insearch of more smoothies and a clue to help us actually figure out what the hell we are gonna do till xmas.

indy's our hostel, gave the answer to some of this in the form of dickie our strange receptionist saw the fact we were clearly too busy being cheeky buggers, boy watching and wandering which way the city was to plan anything so booked us stuff and we did. also got so much free stuff here and so became red carpet tour......

met random conglomerate of people including many dickheads who think trance house is firstly a form of music and secondly applicable to play at 7in the morning in hostel.

shared room with two girls from Blackpool and i use the term loosly as so were they. lynds had a few testy moments of 'i want to hit them kat, please let me they need slapping'. she didn't but she really was right. sess pit of room also contained a candian who's first hobbie is talking at people loudly at time of day about utter noting and second was throwing up in the bin, a guy who thinks cycling round oz is a good idea a stoner fisherman but thankfully there was also dave.

comando dave is army man and used all of his skills of country protection and turned them into control of crazy englich girls skills. basically became yet another person of many to come who would look after us.

guru showed us Sydney, bars, blue mountains which are beautiful but is actually a massive canyon that robs you of your legs to climb out of. thousands of vertical steps. thousands i tell you.

we decided Sydney was cool definately could turn into home and managed to go on runs through art exhibitions, see sights, get pissed, shop, go trekking, learn how to eat pie (thanks guru) be slightly debaucherous and dance our little asses off at strange, strange, under ground clubs, secure flat for xmas and new year and get the ball rolling for trip in a week.

so onward on journey into somewhere started wiht Sydney as base

written by  lynds-n-kat on October 31, 2006 from Sydney, Australia
from the travel blog: Lynds and Kats red-carpet-tour of Australia
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pool "by the beach"

night fever night fever but don't know why

punch. enuff said.

errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, cant move. have big hunk of metal on back.

remember to breathe, remember to breathe. concentrate.

ooooooooooohhhhhhhhh shit

we met some boys......:)

lynds birthday night

coffs harbour sing along session

lynds, anne-marie, dom, luke n kat....coffs crew

a big bird (island) and kat

whos the fitties on the rock???

marine thing that is not a porpoise in the porpoise pool. hmm.....

trouble in form of two irish ladies

kat on the pull

coffs beach...place of run

percy the pelican (lyndseys new boyfriend)

four days we'll stay. still there ten days later in the best hostel we have ever been in. they cook for you get you pissed and drive you round.

after the intolerance of indy's at Sydney we were compensated for sure here.
is all kinds of beautiful the beaches and views etc.....

started well here and were introduced to the whole world of pain the next day that is aussitel punch night. was awesome as was also lynds birthday so the 'reception boys' got cake and much merriment was to be made with thirty or so equally drunk people.

met some fabulous people and it seemed although coffs was blatantly a sleepy little town we could def wake it up..... usually with vodka, goon and tropical juice in a quanity of your choice (free stuff yey!!) and embarrassing games drunken trips down the beach and (in the sea) and really badly timed karaoke as in any time is badly timed.

punch debauchery, and the trouble that enevitably happens when alcohol, me and lynds, some equally alcohol 'liberated' irish, boys and a dance floor are put together, happened more than enough.

learnt to dive with more than promiscuous christian and crew.
me and lynds suddenly found ourselves in the classroom at seven in the morning hungover and with charts and numbers trying to concentrate on things that would save our lives, laughing as pissed still and wandering just how we have ended up back at school and what the hell is a o-valve, why does it sounds so rude and why do i have to check if mine leaks.
the most amazing fun especially when you make up ridiculous underwater signals and have intersting whole in crotch of suit to contend with at very embarrassing moments...

here was where the blessed tea on tap was discovered and we wasted many a day being british, consuming the tea supply in coffs, sat in our hangovers by pool with hyperactive boys and irish ladies that had mess for brains but in a really good way. we were just and morally inept foursome around alcohol. but again in a really really good way. hmmm....

was also place of being caught in brawls, getting lost somewhere in Japan for ages in the botanical gardens (seriously kat we've gone in a circle we're back at central america again..) rope swings ,dolphin spotting, birthday shopping, (free stuff yet again just for being born love it) foam parties, boy trouble (pretty much interest verging on marriage proposals and stirring up interst where we shouldn't. oops. our bad.) and lessons of just how much wine is not advisable to drinnk before a) punch night and b) going out into the public domain.

there's so much i could say but if you ever want to damage yourself alcoholically, stalk sharks with insane locals, lose an obscene amount of clothes in circumstances unknown or waste some time doing the funnest nothing known to man with other people. this is your place....

oh me and lynds can no play volley ball.

written by  lynds-n-kat on November 12, 2006 from Coffs Harbour, Australia
from the travel blog: Lynds and Kats red-carpet-tour of Australia
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kat is how small?

you know we belong together....

byron bay beach and mountainy ness (and the fucking schoolies)

hostel bar byron

byron bay walk up to lighthouse

lynds on a beach (with newly grown beer chin)

wategos bay, byron

me and lynds as east as you get in oz

so we had high hopes for byron... sexy, chilled out little bay of semi hippies that we could live up red carpet tour but no!!!! no i'ts full of schoolies who are running a muck stopping us from getting to the bar and we (i especially are literally loosing myself in the crouds of them due to height deficiency.

bay is beautiful though and we did mamoth trek to light house which proudly had 1901 written on it. impressive till lynds realised that her house is older view was another of those post card ones that we are near immune to now.

hostel is no where hear aussitels brilliance for a start we have one bathroom to share and two german girls spend there whole time in there. and if they're not in there they're trying to get in there.... hmmm.... sounds nothing like germans.

has cool bars that me and lynds have been asserting ourselves in. usually in very embarrassing (but stylish of course) dancing on tables and drinking much of the all too flowing beer that has become regular fixture in diet.

atleast i came home each night and have complete memories. names will not be said but it's kat typing before slander is cast onto the innocent.

found awesome live band as well at a bar called the rails but were too late to hear it all but just in time to hear absolute gem of a line from a schoolie when were caught with no where to run at the bar....

"i'm not having the best time cos i have a girlfriend. just thought i should say that incase you thought i was being a sexual predator"

lynds did usual laughing in someones' face so not choke on beer... i did a quite blatant looking up and down of the prepubesant squirrel features next to me and sigh of you poor deranged little boy. needless to say he sloped off....

and so at a total loss of what to do surrounded by the deviant rich kids we went on mamoth bar crawl so as to dilute the pain oh being surrounded by the same ones for too long, hitting any and i think most drinking establishments in byron... was very healthy and i think my dad will be proud.

so we're moving on to somewhere... but first need a shower so will need an army the size africa to remove greta and gunter features from bathroom or will stay with schoolies forever..... no!!!!!!!!!!!

written by  lynds-n-kat on November 21, 2006 from Byron Bay, Australia
from the travel blog: Lynds and Kats red-carpet-tour of Australia
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this we have decided is a far easier way to track our travels and let people read what were doing, out of choice, not by evil and most irritating emails, addressed to 'enough people to fill a town hall' (Oscar Lawrence, 26.11.06, pp 12)

We are currently resting our sunburnt arses in a little town called Noosa, about 2 hours north of Brisbane (or for my girls, Bris-Vegas). Got here yesterday, actually no thats a lie, the day before......and have been busying ourselves with such activites as kayaking, lounging on beaches, getting drowned repeatedly by waves that dont leave enough time between them for you to get back up again, eating pies (thats just me, kat watches), and waiting for kat to get her sorry hungover arse out of bed (fault of cocky norweigan with ' i can drink a beer faster than you' challenge.)

i am awake, not out of choice, but fault of very loud French girls who are very excited to have arrived, and a dry-cornflake eating man in the dorm. (which most of you probably know is enough to cause me to murder)

tomorrow....Australia zoo...yayyyyyyyy!!!! Even though its waaaay to pricey, and cannot afford in the slightest.....we feel the need to pay tribute to the late and great Mr-Irwin and pay our respects. (though i have in a sense already done that by accidently whacking a great big stingray when kayaking in shallow water yesterday......thought it was a croc as made great big fuss wiggling away...naturally a screaming session ensued and kat thought i had died....but all was ok. im not dead...although i am very sunburnt, and sunburn on arse feels like death)

anyhoo....running out of time here. Were in Noosa, its hot, too hot, and sunny, and there are lots of palm trees and pelicans and norweigans.

Over and out
Lynds (and kat from her unconcious position near loud-frenchies)
xxxxxxxxx

written by  lynds-n-kat on November 26, 2006 from Noosa Heads, Australia
from the travel blog: Lynds and Kats red-carpet-tour of Australia
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anyhooo.....thought id write a little note about this fabulous place we went today called Australia Zoo. Its a small place, if you compare it to the size of Queensland, so was lost pretty much 90% of the time. Miss Hale was obviously very useful in contributing to directions off very-colourful-and-chessington-world-of-adventures-reminiscent-map. Actually, saying that she did get one direction right, cant remember which one but i remember the shock.

Now...not a big fan of zoos. Animals in uber-small enclosures being made to perform for food etc.... (hippy mother can u tell? )....but Australia zoo i was really impressed with. as was the northerner. Very few of the animals were fully enclosed, and you could wander between the kangaroos grazing around, just having a chill session. All of the shows were really nicely done (if u get me)...and were primarily educational not performative (ie...dont stand next to water if you dont want to get eaten. i sense that particular statement was for the benefit of the 'whooping' americans occupying the stands)...which made us feel a little more comfortable.

On a less joyous note, the tribute wall to Steve Irwin was a sobering part of the trip, and actually really sad. Obviously Australia Zoo was his lifes work, and as we learnt in our 'educational' trip, where he grew up. There were loads and loads of khaki shirts and all sorts on a wall for him and messages to his family. Very sad.

anyhoo....

Saw the legendary crocodile show (obviously the late-departed was not doing it, but it was cool nevertheless), wild birds, snakes, fed an elephant, cuddled the kangaroos (who were super friendly), patted a koalas arse, got chased by a wombat on a mission, laughed at kat trying to 'fit in' with the kangaroos, and ate some chips. And a pie for breakfast.
Good day all round.

written by  lynds-n-kat on November 27, 2006 from Noosa Heads, Australia
from the travel blog: Lynds and Kats red-carpet-tour of Australia
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anyway, getting sidetracked, this is lynds, not katie, therefore you will possibly understand this 'blog'

just got back from fraser island. what a fucking experience. can barely even put into words what a fantastic time we have just had. i have an aching stomach from a constant state of pissing-myself-laughing, gripping my seat in fear and the consumation of a quantity of alcohol that i am more than certain borders upon illegal in some more civilized nations of the world.

the scenario:

fraser island night one

the porn: see photos. lake mackenzie. my bad potentially. some unfulfilled career ambitions.

lake macenzie

the problems:

pretty much tthink it's karma for not actually dying in some strange high tide crashing into a wash out incident on fraser though. funniest thing was how uplifted we were when the magic eight ball siad it would turn up again in time which it clearly wont as a ball filled with liquid and answer based on strange mystical magnetic pulls in suspension and pure luck.
oooh maybe it will then.....

spent the day looking for camera and sleeping and cleaning the crap off from fraser still. weather is getting hotter and here (rainbow beach) is the best place in the world to slob out which we are doing with both style, pride and complete and utter heart.

now spent two days by pool drinking tea and blissfully waining the day in semi conscious state and warming ourselves under the december sun?!? i just can't get head round that one i'
m afraid and have tried lots really!!!

certain boys from byron have not only rocked up not onlyy at our hostel but in our room no less..... joy....law of sod i believe. eeeeekkkk

alcohol comsumption has plumeted as comatose sitting condition is bringing around a much needed detox... a little too late we fear from looking at some photos and considering beer volume which has been not unlike a niagra for the last few days (fraser)

am peeling like an over ripe tomato in places and lynds has become ongoing meal for the flying things of the whole of queensland.

are going to see the carlo sandblow tonight but as usual for us someone is driving us there and we dont really know what it is.... should be fun though

written by  lynds-n-kat on December 2, 2006 from Bundaberg, Australia
from the travel blog: Lynds and Kats red-carpet-tour of Australia
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we are now in a beautiful town on 1770. is tiny and there are a lot of people who have both eyes and there enitire family close together.

is dead chilled though and we thought it time to get off (rather large) arses and start doing things again after slump at dingos....

yet again we are being followed up the coast and have met up with old friends, and made some new in the form of the local weirdo group of hippies! wade and linc at the surf center who helped us stop fannying around for a change and gave us a surf lesson.

surfs up

surfs up

they were the ultimate surfere dude stereotype. cvlonde hair to shoulder, too much stoning slow speech and a mamoth 15mins no less to take the boards of the truck which had interupted stories of the expected waves and last nights piss up to halt progress.
however, they knew what they were doing and made sure we did and to be honest. after a few of their tips and pointers.

awaiting for surf lesson

was fucking awesome and seriously addictive. i challenge any reformed crack addict to try get out the water after catching a few good waves in.

after surfing went on to do run that day on the beach (of course) consume the best toasted sandwhiches known to man (a george foreman in. a hostel kitchen.- medal and big hat to whoever thought that one up, am sick to death of only eating things that boil or react with hob only to eat)
then and i quote "quick shower, pop over to the meditation class and cup of tea before bed"

yes, there is no way you can turn down the opportunity to go to a free meditation in the middle of middle of know where oz and have your chakras and light of your door to the kingdom of heaven re-aligned, with some locals and by some tarot reading french woman who believes she is a crow and can fly up to the moon.

seriously though apart from the "pick which animal of mother nature is leading your life." pack of cards. really now?! we were pleasantly surprised and actually was a zoning out experience. could have been the emence day of two hour surfing followed by run and the dimmly lit room though... was weird to suddenly find ones self in a a pre school hall in some small town concentrate on a candle flame and going "ommmm."
but from our hearts, which are our eyes in our chests, obviously. another one of those how did i find myself here, must not have been concentrating scenarios.

genereally, good day all round. we even have our very own chicken salt now. ( is it salt that chickens use or made of chicken or made by chickens nobody knows....)

written by  lynds-n-kat on December 5, 2006 from Rockhampton, Australia
from the travel blog: Lynds and Kats red-carpet-tour of Australia
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we arrived at the harbour and were introduced to our world racing champion 83ft fuck off boat and the crew of three. shannen who was our acdc loving skip, first mate junior who thinks that salad cream is mayonnaise and josh the general cabin boy and ship's cook who knows what mayonnais is.

we were an unlikely bunch of 27 (there was no way names were to remembered but we tried) and it soon became apparent that an 83ft yaugh does not sail itself and that slave labour still continues in this world in the form of continual winching of sails.and dropping of sails and gear changing and boom shifting. that's what we were for. so we boarded and with in minutes and every other minute i was on my bum or my face as i have no sense of balance or anything on a boat (this actually got better as goon was drunk) and lynds eyes to the sky "where's the sun for the sunbathing on the boat".

yet again we were pegged as troubkle from the start but although it is slightl dangerous to put me near something you can fall off and lynds near german girls with faces like slapped arses. we were brilliant company compared to happy and happier, the german couple who never smiled spoke or acknowledged the theme park like haven we were travelling around. (germans)

im bringing sexy back....

spot the girlies

as the trip was becoming over cast the evening moonlight was spectacular throught the clouds me and lynds sat at the bough listening to the animals on the island and imagining being peter pan.

nice innit?

the fish were really curious and kept following us and ncircling in a very plotting something very cunning fachion. (can't spell)

dispite it not being really sunny boat life is great. and we had sailing on 'kat please tie your bag to the boat. please' extreme angles. and evenings discussing the benefits of having a wailing wall with the isrealis and why ice hockey is important to the social structure of canada. no really this drunken ramblings may be important to the future on mankind. that was adrian the irish's imput. and to be fair he can't keep a simple rythum to play 'names of types of' so "actual results may vary......."

the last night was mellower with slow passing of the time back on the goon till the early morning and lots of games of guess what i am now and 40-40 at four in the morning. (turns out Slovenians are bloody good at hiding. think rok is still on there somewhere)

it was an all round amazing experience and memorable for the views, baeutiful white beaches and an ever present of feeling of the sea is awesome, in the true sense of the word.

end of blog

written by  lynds-n-kat on December 10, 2006 from Airlie Beach, Austria
from the travel blog: Lynds and Kats red-carpet-tour of Australia
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