Bed and Breakfast

THings are happening with John.

I can feel pains in my heart.

I have figured out what is happening in Australia and what part my legitimate ancestors have played.

How am I going to retrieve my truth though? If I believe John has it, how can one have it, for this long when you KNOW they have it???? Ah, that has been a question for a very long time.

How can I feel the way I do and have it be detemental to my health. How can live his life, the way he does??? I am beginning to doubt he is a true gypsy at heart, and this also it not his truth. That is why he did not continue to do it throughout his life as much as he did.

Did I give it to him? How much does his ancestry actually have? And how gave it to? And why can I not get it back? And why are things going sour as they are when I seem to already know the outcome to this whole event?

Why can I seem not to manifest an event different than the one last summers ago>

Ok, well, I know what I am going to be looking at now. I have super karma with his whole family. It will give me what I need to look at next but what is this thing hitting me in the head????

I need an whole outlook of this whole thing. Well, that is something I have not alot of , why do I suddenly feel like everything I felt I wanted is no longer worthy of reaching for and why do I feel like I have nothing to put in it's place?

Well, of course, because that is the same thing that happened before. Great/I did not have to experience this again. Great. How am I going to keep in my life after I get my truth back? Well, how are we all going to feel. I do not need another person killing himself over me. But I guess, what will be will be.

Ok, maybe if I can change my sight, I can change the outcome. But what is that I need to not have the same thing happen again all around.

Oh shit, I just remember Buddha day related to the day I die. The day I......welll....THAT just put EVERYTHING into perspective. Maybe related to the day he ascended, oh well, that just answers everything doesn't.

I need to get out of this I know everything rut, it's really getting me down. Ok, and remember visionary intensive you went to with Australian people which had to leave early. That probably speaks to something.

I'm going into my sick of looking mode. Sick of Looking at John stuff just sick of it, it's tires me it hase gone on for years and years and years and years now why does my ancestry continue to belive the so called desried outcome will be different?

Can't we just move on to something else, if he isn't changing with me which he obviously ISN"T

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

get it through your head Francine......I don't even want to be a gypsy anymore, and that says something. I want property by the sea. Right on the seas, lots of acres, maybe a bed and breakfast, yeeeeaaahhhhh,.....thhhhhaaaaaat sounds nice

written by  napulelehuameae on March 14, 2008 from Eugene, United States
from the travel blog: My Life
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