Sad

"I would love to go to Europe and see Europe with John>"

and then I think

My emotions and I felt like I was HOME.

I kinda had that with Ed, well now, why would I have that feeling with him.

And then looking at Aaron has been very hard for me lately but I know I have to look at something.

Go home.

With John.

Go home.

This lifetime.

Why not?

Probably not.

BUT WHAY DO I FEEL THIS WAY

Why can not the head and the heart and the pelvis be given even weight? Why must one be preferred over the others? Why must one go home at the expensive of the others?

How can I watch these things happen around me. That is fine, they will one day disappear.

WHy is there a referrandum against FEELINGS

UGH

FUCK

YEAH

NO

UGH

END

Laugh

Sigh

Now I have to pretend but I don't have to.

I am sorry but I don't know for what.

It is sad the way I have lived my life. But I can't be sad or they will kill me.

written by  napulelehuameae on March 14, 2008 from Eugene, United States
from the travel blog: My Life
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