Family (James) - Blogabond

In July, when my grandfather was given 3 to 6 months to live, he asked to die at home. To do this meant that he needed 24 hour care. To grant his wish, each of my family members took a "shift." This meant staying at his house either during the day, over night, or just a few hours here and there. When I was asked to take a shift, I declined stating that it would be too difficult to get to Sacramento on a regular basis. I always regretted this and felt guilty for being one of the few older grandchildren who wasn't helping out.

Today, my mom asked if I could stay the rest of the week. One of my aunts is sick...and won't be able to take her shift during this week. Even though my grandfather has passed, my grandmother still needs constant attention. Thus, the shifts continue. Without hesitation, I have agreed to stay in Sacramento for the rest of this week. I need to be here. My grandparents took care of me and my cousins when we were younger. They practically raised us. While I couldn't be here to repay my grandfather by taking care of him, I can at least help out for this week and help take care of my grandmother.

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The memorial service and funeral for my grandfather was beautiful. I wasn't planning on saying any words at the memorial service, but did. I'm glad that I had the opportunity to publicly thank my grandfather for sacrificing all he did so that I could have a better life. It was also very heartwarming to hear all my other family members speak so highly of my grandfather.

One of the most touching remarks came from a distant cousin, Carmelyn. While I may say distant, I mean that only by blood. She and her sisters were also one of the many cousins that my grandparents took care of after school. That was the beauty of my grandparents. You didn't even have to be from his line...they would still open up their home and take care of you. Anyway...Carmelyn took all of our childhood memories of being at my grandparents house after school and reminding us of what fun we had. It was poignant, funny, and wonderful. She and her sisters also took old pictures, scanned them, and put them to music. She played these pictures at the luncheon after the funeral. It was a great honor for my grandfather.

I always forget that my grandfather is a WWII vet. I don't know why I forget this as his right arm was crippled from a gun shot wound. But prior to placing my grandfather into the wall, the salute to veterans was played. I cried more at that moment then I did in the past two weeks. Just an FYI: My grandfather wasn't burried. He asked to be placed in the mosoleum wall facing south so that he will always have the sun on him. He was always cold.

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New Years Eve

Since the funeral was on New Years Eve, I ended up celebrating New Years with the family. All 897 of them. Exageration of course...but we were all together. We had a champaigne toast at the stroke of midnight. But since there are 897 of us crammed into my grandparent's living room...and not having enough champaigne glasses, they gave champaigne to groups of 6 and we were to share it. While I was with my family this New Years, it ended up being a great celebration.

After the New Years Toast, we ended up playing Scattergories. We divided ourselves into teams of six. Scattergories is so much easier and more fun played in teams. I was very surprised by my little cousins (about 7 to 12) who were coming up with the most clever of answers. I don't know how one of my little cousins knows what impotence is...but he's (age 11) the one that came up with that answer for the clue "things that are soft" beginning with the letter "i."

Alright...i've got to jet.

Till next time.

James

written by

James Coloma on January 4, 2006 from Sacramento, United States

from the travel blog: Rob & James - Cross Country Trip - December 2005 to January 2006

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