Bollocks - Blogabond

The weather hadn't been too bad over the last week so last Friday I checked out of the nice, cosy hostel I'd been staying at in St Kilda that fed you three times a week and had heaters and beds and drove the two hours down to Phillip Island for two nights of camping and generally being a tourist.

It rained all the way.

I did think about staying in a hostel instead of pitching my new and untested tent but through steely resolve/ grim determination/ utter stupidity (delete as appropiate) I stuck to my original plan and booked into a campsite in Cowes which had a bath as well as showers. This wasn't why I booked into this particular campsite but it certainly helped its cause because when you've spent the night in a tent in South Melbourne in spring you need a hot bath and a cup of tea and possibly minor surgery for the frostbite.

Aside from the Penguin Parade and a few Big Things, the main things to do on the island are made up of Australia's favorite type of tourist attraction; Rocks.

If you give a rock a name and put it on a map people will come and they will marvel and take photographs then three months later they will try and remember why they have so many photos of rocks. Here they have The Nobbies and The Pinnacles.

The Nobbies

The place is full of bloody seagulls! Lets face it, seagulls are the chavs of the bird world and walking along the boardwalk is like walking through (Insert Name Of Any Major British City Here) on a Friday night. It's really intimidating and you honestly wonder if you're going to make it back with your eyes intact. You wouldn't take food up here unless you had a death wish.

It must be nesting season an all because there's loads of young ones wandering about and you know how most animals, no matter how ugly always go through that Cute Stage? Seagulls don't. Even as babies they look like they're going to beat you up for your chips and spare change.

Other things to look out for at The Nobbies is the Blowhole (which is another rock formation, no surprise there then) and the seals which you have to look at through a telescope. The seals are sat on a rock called Seal Rock. Bet you didn't see that one coming did ya.

The Pinnacles

Its... well... it's some rocks. I don't know what else to say about it. Maybe they look nice at sunset or after a few beers or something. It was while I was walking up to these things that I saw my first killer snake in the wild though so that was cool.

Penguin Parade
If you leave Phillip Island without freezing your tits off to watch the penguins you will be ridiculed by your peers and possibly beaten with sticks.

For a mere $17.40 you get to spend an hour sat on a cold, stone step staring at a beach waiting for the Little Penguins (the smallest penguin in the world) to parade across whilst your eyeballs slowly freeze and you begin to lose all sensation in your fingers.

Nah, don't listen to me, I'm a cynical old wench. There's not many things in this world more amusing than watching a group of foot tall penguins trying to get up a sandy hill. It certainly put a smile on my face.

At least it would have done if my lips hadn't seized up.